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HELP this is serious.
So, here's the situation:
My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and living together for this past one. For the past year, our sex life has not been good, and I don't know why. I'm never in the mood, and it seems ike all the foreplay in the world cant turn me on. I havent been enjoying sex. It feels like a chore and sometimes I feel kind of mad and annoyed about it. I love my boyfriend and really dont want to feel this way about our sex anymore.
There are a variety of factors that could've contributed to the problem..
First of all, I get UTIs from sex all the time. I've been prescribed some prophylactic antibiotics, so its been less frequent nowadays. Maybe now that were so "serious" living together and all, I feel like Im allowed to be more concerned about getting a UTI and hell understand? Or maybe the UTI thing is just an excuse to not have sex bc it hasnt been good and i feel like its just not worth the risk..? I just dont know..
Secondly, I've NEVER been able to orgasm with anyone else. I can't even do by myself without my vibrator. So maybe its the sex not being worth it? I used to feel satisfied even though I never orgasmed, but now I just feel kind of sad and defeated..
As I mentioned before, sex hurts. Its been painful for perhaps the last year. It feels like burning and stretching no matter how much lube we use. I dont have any kind of infection, but Hes been really good about it, taking it slowly and all and letting me pick the positions, and I feel so bad that its not getting better.
Lastly, Im not too keen on oral sex. We do it sometimes, but it doesn't do much for me 
I know that there is a lot going on here, but I hope someone has experienced something remotely similar and can give some solid advice. This is really serious. I love my boyfriend and I feel like our relationship is practically perfect except for the sex.
Hopefully one of you long term ladies can help 
Thanks!
Re: HELP this is serious.
Also, has anyone been to a sex therapist?
See a urologist --- he might want to do a test to see if you're harboring bacteria -- they call it an IVP.
You might also have a condition called interstitual cystitis.
I also suggest you try masturbation with your own bare hands.:) See what touches turn you on.
Ditto the recommendation for a urologist. I had reoccurring UTIs for years and it turned out that I was harboring the infection in my bladder. 90 days of medication to make sure it was completely dead and I haven't had another UTI since.
I would also make sure that your BF is "fresh" when you have sex. The thrusting motion of intercourse can push any dirt and bacteria on his skin or in his groin area up your urethra. Have sex after a shower or ask that he clean his junk (or offer to do it for him) before you have sex.
Cranberry juice or cranberry pills can really help keep the PH in your body in check.
Go to your OBGYN for a full check up and possible ultrasound to make sure that everything is ok internally. A friend of mine had serious tumors and sex was very uncomfortable for her for years. She had an ablation and life is much better for her.
Now, on to your orgasm issue. You can go one of two routes...stop using the vibrator at all and try to retrain your body to orgasm from other stimulation. Similar to a guy with a "death grip" who can't orgasm without his own hand, you have to retain your body to respond to the subtler sensations of fingers and tongue. Remember though, most women do not experience orgasms from just vaginal penetration (and I mean 70%+ of women, so don't think you are broken).
The clitoris is located inconveniently far from the vaginal opening. You may be able to grind your clitoris on his pelvic bone, but chances are you will need to add your fingers or his fingers to the mix to get an orgasm during intercourse. Or he can give you an orgasm FIRST with his fingers or tongue! There is no Sex Rule that says orgasms must only occur during intercourse. An orgasm is a good thing no matter what the timing.
Now, on to your lubrication problem. Talk to your OB. You may have a hormonal imbalance that is preventing you from producing adequate lubrication. Or you may be using a lube that has a chemical that is irritating to your vagina. Ask your OB for recommendations.
Finally, if you can't orgasm without a vibrator, use a vibrator. Use a vibrator during intercourse. Use the vibrator before intercourse, get yourself off, THEN have penetration. There are no Sex Rules about "no mechanical devices when two people are present in the bed". The objective to sex with your lover is to have a good time. If you need a vibrator to get off, use it.
An overall good idea:
pee before and after sex and drink lots of water.
I also suggest a cranberry pill a day --- probiotic yogurts help, too. Have at least one of those a day.:)
It may be possible that you and he are passing a bug back and forth. It would be a good idea for him to have a checkup as well, for the same purpose you are going to have one.
ALL of this OP.