Family Matters
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

MIL Vent

Yes, I know, there are probably hundreds of threads on this exact subject, but MILs drive us crazy, am I right?

 Anyway, my SIL and her family are flying in from across the country tomorrow to visit for a week, and my husband's grandma on his dad's side (his parents are divorced) lives a few hours away and can only visit on Saturday evening. So, we planned a family get together for Saturday evening for their dad's side of the family.

 Then, my husband calls his mom and asked when she would like to have a get together for her side of the family, and that we are available any day this week except Saturday at 4pm. So then she decided that SHE wanted Saturday at 4pm... and Saturday morning, Friday evening, or any time on Sunday, or any other day of the week was not acceptable to her. (She doesn't have a job, she doesn't have any plans, and her whole family already said they were free all weekend.) 

 Then, today, the MIL calls and says that she planned party for my SIL on Saturday at 4pm, and that "she will just have to choose which family she would rather see." 

 How EVIL do you have to be to do that to someone? 

 And this is the woman who cornered me demanding that I admit that I am using her son for his big d*ck, and when I refused to "admit it", she told him that I was going to break up with him. ON HIS BIRTHDAY.   

Re: MIL Vent

  • Why do you guys keep in contact with this woman?  What does your H have to say about her? 

     Man, if I had a MIL like that, I'd send her a birthday card with a picture of me fellating her son with a big thumbs up.

    Our Wedding Website
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic image
  • We literally see her like 4 times a year and she lives 20 minutes away. Every time we try to make plans with her, she cancels on us like as we're getting in the car to leave, and then later complains that DH is a horrible and ungrateful son because he never visits her. So we put up with her on major holidays, and in this case, a yearly visit by his sister. I feel so bad for him (and his sister)... No one deserves a parent like that.  :( 

  • None of that explains why they still put up with her.
    fiizzlee = vag ** fiizzle = peen ** Babies shouldn't be born wit thangs ** **They're called first luddz fo' a reason -- mo' is supposed ta come after. Yo Ass don't git a medal fo' marryin yo' prom date. Unless yo ass is imoan. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Then yo ass git a all-expenses paid cruise ta tha Mediterranean n' yo ass git ta hook up Jared Padalecki on tha flight over while bustin yo' jammies. But still no medal.
  • Seriously - you're giving this woman way too much power and it seems like she is taking it and running with it. She makes plans for you for Saturday? Don't show up. If she says anything, "Sorry MIL, we told you specifically that time would not work with our schedules." I don't see what the big deal here is, she doesn't get to dictate your lives - you are grown ups.
  • I dunno about EVIL. It just sounds like she is an incurable crazy b!tch. Much like the poster below I would just ignore her, eliminate any expectations of normal when it concerns her and when you are forced into a situation with her just plaster on a smile and nod along with whatever nonsense she is spewing.

    Did you laugh when she was demanding that you admit that you were using her son for his *cough* sizable asset?

  • imageJess91192:
    And this is the woman who cornered me demanding that I admit that I am using her son for his big d*ck, and when I refused to "admit it", she told him that I was going to break up with him. ON HIS BIRTHDAY.   

    Um, and you're upset that she won't be hanging out with you guys, WHY?

    image
  • Yeah... not sure why you keep reaching out to her.  SIL visits?  Let HER make plans w/ her mother on her own if she wants to see her.  

    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
    DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10

  • imageJess91192:

     Then, today, the MIL calls and says that she planned party for my SIL on Saturday at 4pm, and that "she will just have to choose which family she would rather see." 

    What usually happens when you don't choose her?

    My darling daughter just turned 4 years old.
  • stay firm "unfortunately you made the decision for us by planning the party for when we have other plans". Reiterate that you tried conveying your plans to her early so that plans would not overlap...you wanted to see both families and did what you could to make that happen. Then express hope for the future "I hope next time you'll work with us"
  • I think you are giving your MIL power that she doesn't need.

    First of all, if you wanted to gtg with "her side of the family," I'm not sure why you didn't reach out to these people on your own and plan a party.  I sense some jealousy over your dad's family and competition, but you played right into her hands.  The conversation could have gone "Hi mom, with sister visiting, we'd throught we'd throw a party on Sunday afternoon.  How does that sound?" 

    At this point, H should tell his mom he has plans for Saturday.  So sorry.  If he wants, he can plan an alternate party for his maternal aunts/grandparents on a different day and invite her like any other guest. 

  • I think you simply need to tell her sorry we already have plans that day.  Next time plan the gtg yourself and just tell her when/where it is.
  • you have to stop giving her that kind of power. 

    Instead of saying "hey MIL lets' go to dinner together."

    try "hey MIL, DH and i are going to eat here, we'd love it if you can join us."

    Then if she cancels at the last moment. "aww, that's too bad maybe next time." and then go enjoy your dinner.

     

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • She actually referred to her own son's d!ck? No.
  • " And this is the woman who cornered me demanding that I admit that I am using her son for his big d*ck, and when I refused to "admit it", she told him that I was going to break up with him. ON HIS BIRTHDAY.  "

    you seem surprised at how she's acting now. why?

    Friday, December 28 2012. The day I had emergency appendix surgery in Mexico and quit smoking. Proof that everything has a good side!! DH and I are happily child-free!! No due date or toddler tickers here!! my read shelf:
    Alison's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf) 
  • imagembcdefg:

    imageJess91192:
    And this is the woman who cornered me demanding that I admit that I am using her son for his big d*ck, and when I refused to "admit it", she told him that I was going to break up with him. ON HIS BIRTHDAY.   

    Um, and you're upset that she won't be hanging out with you guys, WHY?

    This. Exactly. I'm sure her son (your H) can see how bat*hitcrazy she is, and why on earth would you want to spend time with her? She'll figure it out when ultimately, no one rsvps yes to her events. Let her cry and moan and complain all she wants - she's creating this mess, not you!!
  • imagembcdefg:

    imageJess91192:
    And this is the woman who cornered me demanding that I admit that I am using her son for his big d*ck, and when I refused to "admit it", she told him that I was going to break up with him. ON HIS BIRTHDAY.   

    Um, and you're upset that she won't be hanging out with you guys, WHY?

    This. Exactly. I'm sure her son (your H) can see how bat*hitcrazy she is, and why on earth would you want to spend time with her? She'll figure it out when ultimately, no one rsvps yes to her events. Let her cry and moan and complain all she wants - she's creating this mess, not you!!
  • I'd like to know exactly what her son has said about all this?


  • imageNukke:

    Why do you guys keep in contact with this woman?  What does your H have to say about her? 

     Man, if I had a MIL like that, I'd send her a birthday card with a picture of me fellating her son with a big thumbs up.

     

    I literally laughed out loud for a good minute.  


    Daisypath Wedding tickers
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards