Starting Over
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Topic of the day: Online Dating-POLL
While we're on the topic...
OK ladies...I'm officially making the plunge and doing the online dating thing. I did it a while back through Match and honestly had a good experience with it, I just wasn't ready for a relationship and wanted to "try" it out. Now, I'm either doing eHarmony (a girl at work just signed up and wants someone to do it with her) or Match. I like the appeal of being able to choose who I find attractive via Match, however, I like the idea of all of the questions eHarmony asks and that interests me as well.
Cost aside, what did you have a better success with (success can be however you define it-more dates, higher quality dates, long term relaltionship, etc.)
Thanks!
[Poll]The Nestie formally known as....
Re: Topic of the day: Online Dating-POLL
I did eHarmony first -- it was okay and I did have some sucess, but didn't like the format of the way the site worked.
Since I left eHarmony I've been on OkCupid, and while I've been a date or two it's a lot of weeding thru people since it's a free site. A couple days ago some 14 year old kid contacted me, and I've gotten several emails from 18/19 year olds.
Match.com seems like a great site, and I like a lot of the men on there, but so far I'm not having much luck with them communicating back -- working on it...
I was on Match for two different free 7-day trials, and it was okay.
I was on OkCupid for a few months, and I liked it much better.
I had the most dates through OkC. I think the guys on Match were more "legit" by percentage, but they were also more boring and I didn't like any of them much.
I met more D-bags on OkC, but I also met two guys that were awesome and that I really liked and had on-going things with (and still do with the second one).
I paid for Match.com, and went on a few dates. Most people on there seem more educated, and like they are actually looking for a match.
I also used Plenty of Fish. OMG the stupidity on there is amazing. It was worth it for the entertainment value. I actually did meet my current H on there.
I've been on them all, lol
E-Harmony never matched me up with anyone in my state. Really liked Match for a while until they started changing everything. Got tired of paying for it, so I went to okCupid. I really like how you can get really in-depth with the questions there. That's where I met my current SO, and we're going on 3 months.
You hit the nail on the head! You cant go into it thinking each message may be from Mr Right, you need to just have fun with it and if you meet some friends or fall in love BONUS! Yes for a woman on the sites it can be very time consuming, I would actually de-activate my account on and off because the messages were overwhelming.
I did them almost all as well lol.
POF was mostly guys just looking for flings I felt like. I did meet one or two really nice guys on OKC...
I met my current BF on match. I paid for it and I think you get out of it what you put in. I went in with an open mind and tried to just have fun with it. I met a few good guys and a few creepers.
Coming out of lurkdom to agree with this. I was on two sites - Match and eHarmony - and for both I went into it just looking to have some fun and meet new guys. There were some real weirdos on there, but I just tried not to pay attention to them and focus in on the ones I was interested in.
I get what achase was saying though about it feeling like a job - especially in the beginning (or when I updated my profile pic) it could get a bit overwhelming.
I also agree w/ the PP who said eHarmony is pretty restrictive - sometimes I liked it, but mostly I didn't. And I started to notice that quite a few of the guys on EH were also on Match. Not all, but maybe 1/3 to 1/2.
I don't want to be a Debbie Downer either. I met my stbxh on eHarmoney. I thought it was the greatest site ever. I think it still can be as long as you feel really good about yourself and know how to watch out for red flags.
I won't be going the online path in the future when I feel ready to date. I just want learn how be myself and life the lifestyle that I want. The type of lifestyle I want would require seeing a friend who wants similiar things in person before I start dating. I would feel online would force the dating mind too fast for me from a friendship point of view.
I think that's the right mindset everyone should have, no matter what means they go about dating!
I've spent the last year + with just ME. And now...I'm ready to share that with someone. I've created great friendships online (thank you Nest!) so I figured, this is an easier way for me to meet someone with similar wants, etc. rather than going out, etc.
I just wanted to add that if this is how you feel about it, you might try OkCupid. Obviously you can see everyone's pictures, etc., but they also have a "Questions" tab -- you can answer questions as well as see other people's answers to those questions. It kind of tells you how compatible you are based on how you both answered those questions. There are about a billion questions, but you can answer only the ones you want, and skip the ones you don't like.
They range from religion to politics to lifestyle to personality. I found it really interesting and helpful.
Good luck, either way!
I voted special snowflake because I really think it is regional.
I met my XH on match and had a lot of success with match when I was in my 20s but that was like a decade ago before there were so many sites. Then again I met my last bf on match too but I weeded through a lot of junk to find him. I hated eharmony so I strongly vote against that! I've had some decent luck with POF but where I live now there is no one on POF. (lots of people when I lived in NY). These days I am on okcupid b/c I am too cheap to spend the $ on match. I am meeting date number 2 from OKC tomorrow but so far he looks promising
I think part of it depends on what area you live in. I did match and eHarmony. Match felt like a "bar online" to me ... I didn't like the vibe and while I met a few nice guys on there, no one that I really hit it off with.
I also went on several dates with guys form eHarmony and I felt the quality of men there was much better. It is a bit time consuming, but I met my bf on eHarmony and we are prepping to move in together, so I guess I feel like it was worth the time. We've been together a year yesterday.