International Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Random husband vent time
My H has no sense of direction. NONE. He has driven back and forth to my parents' house dozens of times, and he still insists on using the GPS. He literally doesn't know the way without it. It's not complicated and even if it were he should know it by now. I am so sick of giving him directions to places he has been 100 times! Ugh!
Anyone else feel like venting about their H?
Re: Random husband vent time
It is so frustrating that DH would be perfectly happy staying at home, indoors, all day every weekend and evening, with the exception of going out to eat. If it were up to him, weekends would be wake up, eat, mess with computer, go out to lunch, come home, nap, mess with computer, go out to dinner, come home, watch movie on TV, bed. Lather, rinse, repeat. It's exhausting always being the one to make the plans.
This is EXACTLY my darling husband! It is like that part of his brain is missing. When we lived in DC, you could either take a right or a left to get out of our apartment complex. Right would take you to the highway. Left would take you away from the highway. He took the wrong turn every.single.time. We lived there for 2 years.
Best part is he still trusts his directional instinct even though 90% of the time he is completely wrong. I sometimes wonder if his commute really is bad or if he just gets lost on a daily basis.
My Israel Blog!
My DH never sees that anything in the apartment is dirty and if I ask him to vacuum/clean the bathroom/dust he only will do something like 50% of it and then expect to be praised about it.
When we came back from being in the US this summer the floors were so dirty and as soon as we walked in he said "Wow, it's so clean here". He was the last one at home since I had been in the US weeks before home. He had mopped the floors once and was just wanting to hear praise about it, 4 weeks later (granted no one was in our apartment, but the cat...who sheds, so the floors were dirty).
Ugh. It's incredibly annoying.
Please add me to this list! My husband would get lost going around the block if I was not in the car with him. Somehow I can get more places than he can and I have lived here 4 years...he has lived here his whole life. Buying the GPS was the best gift I ever got him.
We are going to SD Year 12 graduation next Saturday. I knew I was going to have to be around his ex, no big deal.
Then I find out TWO days ago, that we are going out to dinner with them (the ex-wife, the e MIL and the ex GMIL) on the day of graduation. He doesn't seem to get that I'm not all into playing one big happy family when we aren't. I asked why she can't have two graduation dinners, just like every other child of divorced parents. I got a "she only has one graduation day". Grr.
He seriously needs to get over the whole absent parent guilt thing.
Okay, my DH is fantastic with directions, like he has a gift. But, he is one of those crazy, scary German drivers (for those of you who have driven in Germany) Its like another person takes over as soon as he sits down in the car, and as soon as we hit the Autobahn, he has to drive as fast as possible, and needs to "push" all the slow drivers out of the way. I hate it.
I keep telling him that he cannot drive this way once we have our LO, but his father is even more aggresive when he drives, so DH thinks this is completely normal behavior.
I have a vent. DH goes away for a week every 2 months. I hate that he goes away. It's hard work being home alone with two without family support. Plus, last time, M cut her first 2 teeth. This time, she's just cut #3 and working on #4, she's got a cold, her sleep is like a newborn again (4 wakings a night), W has been a handful last week (half term and full of cold so cranky as anything), and now I'm full of cold.
Do I ever get time off before or after he goes away? NO. He knows I want it. I tell him. He says, we'll try blah, blah, blah, but never does anything, leaves his stuff (like packing) to the last minute, says how much he'll miss the kids, can he have time with W (so can I take M while cooking dinner so they can have an outing), etc, etc.
I know full wlel that he'll come back absolutely pooped (but having had 6 hours or more of uninterrupted sleep for 4 nights) and need to have a lie in, tiem off, etc. I have had exactly 2 child-free hours since M was born, and very little before that. I know he works hard and working isn't a rest, but I need time free from kids to be 'me' again.
Vent over.
I totally know what you mean, and I am sooooooo glad that DH does not drive like many Germans. Sometimes he worries me when he drives 160kmh on a pretty much empty Autobahn on a sunny day, but the rare times I get into a car with a different German driving and am scared for my life, I am reminded of what a cautious driver DH is.
And since I don't know how to quote twice -- Shekels, you made me laugh out loud wondering if your DH gets lost every day on the way to work!! hahahahaha!!
Welshgirl- After a vent like that, I just wish I were there to give you a hug and offer to babysit because it sounds like you really need some time off
I hope that you get some 'you' time soon!
My vent is that H is always involved with sports and doesn't understand that him talking to me with the game on and him talking to me without the game on is not the same thing. He will go on and on about how wonderful it is to watch a game and have me there talking to him but doesn't even think (despite the fact that I am vocal about it) that it might be a little less wonderful to me. He has football (american) practice twice a week, plus occasional games on the weekends and on the other nights he wants to watch football on television. AGH! I'm not sportsy and never have been so the fact that I let him hog the tv and computer all the time should be taken into consideration. If I ask for 10 freakin' minutes without the game playing before I go to sleep, I don't think it is that ridiculous (seeing as we had been watching the redzone channel for more than an hour!!!)
I am so sorry Welsh! Your husband is being ridiculous and I think you need to not give him a choice. Just tell him, don't ask, that you will be getting the lie in, or you will be going out for 2 hours and please be sure to feed M and W at this time, etc. I have so many friends whose husbands travel weekly for work and they all get a break when their husbands get home. It is sharing parental responsibility, and your dh needs to step up to the plate. How have you only had 2 child free hours in almost a year?? He really, really needs to give you a break, and I say at this point you just take one. Go see a movie by yourself. Go shopping. Take a nap. Just tell him it is what is going to happen.
Ok, apparently I'm the scary German driver in the relationship over here. I LOVE going fast on the Autobahn! Sigh...good times.
As for DH, he's the type that will expect praise for cleaning, cooking, etc. Umm...do I ask you to throw me a parade every time I do a load of laundry?! No! So STFU and just do it without acting like you deserve a damn medal!
So, the morning that DS wakes up in horrible mood, I mean so bad that neighbors on both sides were woken up, that DH not only leaves early for work, but seriously was planning on leaving by just yelling up the stairs, "see you I am going to work." Um, I am still getting dressed, could I even get a kiss or something?
Oh, I adore going fast. I was driving a few American women to a class a few years ago, and they were all commenting on how "cool" I was that I was driving so fast, and one said, "I feel like I'm in a race car." The high speed does not bother me in the slightest, its the approaching slow left-lane drivers at high speeds, jumping on breaks, pulling up alongside, and getting in "fights" on the Autobahn that drive me up the wall! When we have an open lane, I don't really notice the speed.
Oh Welshgirl I know how you feel. I lone-parent a good portion of the time right now- (DH has only been home 3 days this month!!! ) and it's very hard. He always promises me a day off and when the day comes, something always comes up like a sickness, etc...but now I stick to it and go. I make my plans and that's it. We pick the day and there is no going back! I usually only take about 4 hours off- not the whole day, but it's something at least. We also have a babysitter a few hours during the week so I can go to dr. appointments, etc and that helps immensely. I can even sneak an hour here and there to sit and have a cup of coffee alone...it's something to look forward to. As they get older it gets easier I am noticing! I feel for you though!
I adore my husband. I really do. But I'm going crazy with him in hospital.
He is not the most organized type of person. He asked me a week or two ago to bring him up his personal dvd player. This is a dvd player I have not ever seen in the two years we've lived together. I looked for it once before because he was going to give it to someone and I couldn't find it then. Now he wants it in hospital. I tore the unit apart looking for it and I finally found it after several hours of searching. BUT! I couldn't find the power cord for it. The power cord with it only plugs into a cigarette lighter in the car. He swears there is a normal power cord for it but for the life of me I can't find it.
Now he is a bit of a computer nerd and he has bits and pieces of gadgets and gizmos and cords in various places throughout our unit. I searched everywhere and tore the place apart doing it but still no power cord. Found a couple that ALMOST fit, but none that quite did.
He actually had me bring him the dvd player and the ALMOST fitting cords, as if he thought maybe it was me and they really did fit, only to say nope, they don't fit and have me bring it all back home again.