September 2009 Weddings
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A funny puzzler...

So, we were confronted with an icky situation yesterday that I'm interested in getting the Niners' opinion on.

We have season tickets for the Bears and we're playing Detriot on the 13th. the game was originally scheduled for noon but thanks to the NFL/FOX's flexible scheduling the game has now been moved to 3:15. The issue is that we rsvp'd to attend a wedding two hours away with the reception starting at 5pm.

Our original plan had been to go to the game, leave around three, change in the car and drive down to the reception site, missing the ceremony but joining in for the rest of the festivities. This clearly cannot happen with a 3:15 start time with the game.

So, what would you do?

Things you probably want to know:

We can't/won't sell the tickets so we'd be giving someone $350 worth of tickets and parking for free; by the end of the season we'll have already missed 2 our of 8 games because of commitments that came about prior to the schedule coming out

These are not super good friends of ours. I would say we see them quarterly but always have a good time and enjoy their company. If the roles were reversed they would never give up $350 to come to our wedding (trust me on this one). However, the entire group of friends will be there and we probably won't get to them again until January.

Lastly, I can't take the Monday after the wedding off so if we did go we'd be driving the 2 hours home at 11pm so I could be at work by 8:30 Monday morning.

Jay and I have pretty much come to a decision after a long discussion about it but I'm interested in what you gals might do in this situation.

Happy Hump DayStick out tongue

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Re: A funny puzzler...

  • Call me rude, but since they're not super close friends, I'd go to the game!

    BUT - why can't you sell the tickets?

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  • Go to the game!!!
    White Knot
    Stand up for something you believe in. White Knot
  • I'm a HUGE sports fan and if I were in your shoes, I'd jersey-up and head to the stadium, my friend! Have a great time! :)
    Dave and Kathleen - 09.12.09:

    image 

  • Well I I know that I wouldn't give up my Packer tickets if there was a wedding the same day!

    Besides, January is not too far away to get together with everyone again. Go have fun at the game!! :)

    ExerciseMilestone
  • I'd go to the game. January isn't that far away to see your friends, and a 2 hour drive that late at night would suck.
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  • 1) I would never buy $350 worth of tickets for any event... not even for the Red Sox.

    2) You already RSVP'd for the wedding, so as we well know know they're planning on you being there which means they're shelling out cash to cover your plate.  Not going would be 100% rude, unexpected time change of the game or not...

    3) I would assume you considered the 2-hour drive when you RSVP'd to the wedding, so I don't think that is a valid point to not go either...

    Sorry, but I just don't understand missing a wedding for friends who, though you may not see them often, you mentioned enjoying their company, because of a football game.  It seems selfish to me, choosing a sports event  (and not even a playoff game, at that) over a wedding you already responded to... but maybe that's just me in the minority here.  *shrug*  $0.02 given

     

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  • Wait a minute... I just realized you said Bear tickets. For that I change my answer. Go to the wedding and forget the bears! lol
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  • imagemichelle142:

    Call me rude, but since they're not super close friends, I'd go to the game!

    BUT - why can't you sell the tickets?

    We can't sell the tickets for two reasons: 1) we tried contacting many friends last night to see if they were interested but no one was due to the hefty price tag; 2) I won't sell them to strangers because if they act a fool in our seats our season tickets could get revoked and that is not a risk I'm willing to take.

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  • Sorry V, but my $0.02 is that it's kinda rude to skip the ceremony and go to the reception anyway, so you probably shouldn't have RSVP'd to the reception in the first place.

    If it were me, I'd send a card and gift with regrets, and not go to the wedding.

  • imageMBMcC421:

    2) You already RSVP'd for the wedding, so as we well know know they're planning on you being there which means they're shelling out cash to cover your plate.  Not going would be 100% rude, unexpected time change of the game or not...

    this is the part that gets me.  We had several people bail no/show who had RSVPed yes, and I was pissed that my parents had to shell out money for their plates and they didn't even come. 

    I'm with Ames, you probably shouldn't have RSVPed yes at all, but that's kind of irrelevant now.  If you're not going to go (which it sounds like you've already made up your mind), I'd at least call and tell them ahead of time so they aren't expecting you to come and you just not show up.  I mean, it's probably too late to avoid them paying for your dinner, but at least they can know about it ahead of time.

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  • imageMBMcC421:

    1) I would never buy $350 worth of tickets for any event... not even for the Red Sox.

    I can appreciate that but we save up for this all year, it's our thing. I personally would never spend money to go to video game convention or spend money on video games but I would never say that someone shouldn't spend their own money on what they enjoy.

    2) You already RSVP'd for the wedding, so as we well know know they're planning on you being there which means they're shelling out cash to cover your plate.  Not going would be 100% rude, unexpected time change of the game or not...

    I do plan on calling her this evening and apologizing for the change but I know from discussion with a mutual friend that she doesn't have to give her head count until this weekend so she won't be spending money on us (as far as I know)

    3) I would assume you considered the 2-hour drive when you RSVP'd to the wedding, so I don't think that is a valid point to not go either...

    We did but my original plan had been to call in sick but, and this is due to my own forgetfulness, because the 11th is Veteran's Day and a government holiday I can't use a sick day the following working day with would be that Monday. I don't have any other days to use

    Sorry, but I just don't understand missing a wedding for friends who, though you may not see them often, you mentioned enjoying their company, because of a football game.  It seems selfish to me, choosing a sports event  (and not even a playoff game, at that) over a wedding you already responded to... but maybe that's just me in the minority here.  *shrug*  $0.02 given

     I always appreciate your 2 cents and I assure you everything that you've pointed out was discussed. I guess it is a little selfish but sometimes I think it's ok to be a little selfish when you've invested a lot of money into something

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  • imagelneuner09:
    imageMBMcC421:

    2) You already RSVP'd for the wedding, so as we well know know they're planning on you being there which means they're shelling out cash to cover your plate.  Not going would be 100% rude, unexpected time change of the game or not...

    this is the part that gets me.  We had several people bail no/show who had RSVPed yes, and I was pissed that my parents had to shell out money for their plates and they didn't even come. 

    I'm with Ames, you probably shouldn't have RSVPed yes at all, but that's kind of irrelevant now.  If you're not going to go (which it sounds like you've already made up your mind), I'd at least call and tell them ahead of time so they aren't expecting you to come and you just not show up.  I mean, it's probably too late to avoid them paying for your dinner, but at least they can know about it ahead of time.

    I would never just not show and not call and like I mentioned above I am going to call her this evening. We did just find out about the schedule change yesterday morning so we discussed and came to a conclusion and are taking action as soon as we possibly can.

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  • imagelilswimmer:
    Wait a minute... I just realized you said Bear tickets. For that I change my answer. Go to the wedding and forget the bears! lol

    Ha ha ha Stick out tongue

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  • imagelaw67:

    1) I would never buy $350 worth of tickets for any event... not even for the Red Sox.

    I can appreciate that but we save up for this all year, it's our thing. I personally would never spend money to go to video game convention or spend money on video games but I would never say that someone shouldn't spend their own money on what they enjoy.

    I said for ANY event -- trust me, if it cost me $350 to walk into a video game convention, I would reconsider my hobbies... luckily for me its only $50 for one weekend a year, but I digress... I never said someone shouldn't spend their money on what they enjoy, this is just frugal ol' me saying $350 for one thing, one day, is too much for anything, IMO.  ESPECIALLY when you already committed yourself to other plans.  But again, my opinion, and it looks like your mind has already been made up, so bringing this to the board just seems like it was moot to begin with, no?

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  • imageamelianguy:

    Sorry V, but my $0.02 is that it's kinda rude to skip the ceremony and go to the reception anyway, so you probably shouldn't have RSVP'd to the reception in the first place.

    If it were me, I'd send a card and gift with regrets, and not go to the wedding.

    I normally wouldn't do have done that, the ceremony is the most important part, but we were trying to do as much of everything that day as we could  :shrug:

    We will be sending a gift and card with one of our mutual friends for sure.

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  • imageMBMcC421:
    imagelaw67:

    1) I would never buy $350 worth of tickets for any event... not even for the Red Sox.

    I can appreciate that but we save up for this all year, it's our thing. I personally would never spend money to go to video game convention or spend money on video games but I would never say that someone shouldn't spend their own money on what they enjoy.

    I said for ANY event -- trust me, if it cost me $350 to walk into a video game convention, I would reconsider my hobbies... luckily for me its only $50 for one weekend a year, but I digress... I never said someone shouldn't spend their money on what they enjoy, this is just frugal ol' me saying $350 for one thing, one day, is too much for anything, IMO.  ESPECIALLY when you already committed yourself to other plans.  But again, my opinion, and it looks like your mind has already been made up, so bringing this to the board just seems like it was moot to begin with, no?

    To be fair, and this is totally just me playing devil's advocate, we had paid for the season tickets before we even knew there was going to be a wedding.

     l think I did say in my op that we had already made a decision but I just thought it was and interesting situation to bring to the board. Like the ladies here, there was a split between the people that I talked to about this irl and I just wanted to what people would have to say.

    It's given people something to post about this morning, no? Wink

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  • I'm late to the party, but it sounds like you want to go to the game. I don't blame you in the least, especially when you've already spent that much for tickets. I think it'd be rude if you RSVPd yes and didn't show, but since you're planning on letting them know if advance and it won't mess up their headcount, I think you're fine.
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