Trouble in Paradise
doglove
member
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
WTF?
I was just responding to that post when it was DD'ed. Here's what I was going to say in response to Kuus's response:
ReturnOfKuus:
And I'm a little alarmed by the idea of one spouse saying "I feel so isolated and disconnected from you that it's hard to stay monogamous and committed" and the other saying "Oh well, can't be helped - I need to keep my grades up."
This poster has posted before regarding the doucheyness of her DH. Everytime it's the same and I feel like banging my head against a brick wall when I read these posts.
Re: WTF?
ugh!!! why???
Since they're both undergrads, put me down as "too young for marriage/kids".
I wonder if his first name is Mike.
Kuus- I was in the middle of responding to her to say that I can't disagree w/ your assessment of his schooling. Yes, he needs to study. But I was raising an eyebrow at the fact that he has to study all.the.time in order to do well.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Currently Reading: Don Quixote by Miguel De Cervantes
I think a lot of it has to do with expectations; if she is used to him being home all the time and doesn't have a job/independent activities to keep her busy, is home sitting with the baby some of that loneliness doesn't come from his unavailability, it comes from her expectation that he fill her time. That said, he needs to find a balance and if she's lonely she should bring it up and he should set aside time for her, but she sounds kind of needy/clingy to me. There are definitely programs that require a ridiculous amount of work, but there are also people who have to put in more work for programs that might come naturally to others. Especially if this is his first semester he might tone it down once he gets the hang of things.
I also have concerns that if he is going to be a nurse there are inevitably times he will work a lot (I have friends who do 4 days, 12 hour shifts in a row); having to be independent and make quality time for one another is going to be a reality of his job going forward so they need to sort it out.