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Teachers-How would you feel getting this email??

Names and locations have been generalized.

Ms. Teacher,
 
My name is Joe Blow. I am Jimmy B's dad.
 
I just wanted to touch base with you and see if you were open to the idea of communiating with me regarding Jimmy via email or phone as I live in another state. I have joint legal custody and if you require any documentation, I'll be happy to scan and provide prior to you communicating with me. I have had a good working relationship with his X grade and Next grade teachers Ms. K and Ms. J. They have emailed report cards and just from time to time touched base on how he was doing in class in general.
 
I know parent teacher conference time is here and I'm sure you are extremely busy, however once you've had the opportunity to do your face to face conferences would you be so kind as to communicate to me as well? As is the case in some divorce situations communication between the parents doesn't happen like it should so I would like to stay informed and help support and encourage Jimmy every chance I get.
 
I take as active a role as possible with the distance that we have. I work with him all summer and each holiday or visitation weekend with regards to reading especially. We've worked on telling time, math, etc in the past. I am a firm beliver in "if you don't use it (knowledge) you lose it" so we work very hard to make it fun and use his skills every chance we get. I got a lot of use out of the school/district website especially in X grade. It had updated newsletters weekly and during my nightly phone calls I could interact with Jimmy regarding what was going on that week in class etc. It doesn't seem SCHOOL NAME's website is quite as updated but I do follow the calendar for events.
 
If there is anything I can do to assist the class, even from my state ie. donations,etc., please feel free to contact me. At my household we've been collecting BoxTops forever and if SCHOOL uses them I'd love to send them on to Jimmy's class.
 
In closing I want to thank you for the work you do and although work schedules and traveling to pick up the children doesn't always coincide with school hours, I hope to have the opportunity to meet you at some point this school year and visit the class.
 
My phone number if you ever need anything is xxx-xxx-xxxx
 
Thank You,
Joe Blow

Re: Teachers-How would you feel getting this email??

  • are you feeling strange about the email?

    I dont see anything wrong with it.  My husband has 2 sons that live 4 hrs away and has made similar intro emails.  Some teachers are pretty general and only reply to emails, others will keep him in the loop and are a bit more proactive.  Now that the kids are in HS he doesnt do it as much.  Also, we are lucky the boys mom shares information with us as well as the boys.

    As long as there is no legal documentation saying NOT to communicate, then I dont see any concern.  In my daughter's school it is the parents responsability to identify if there is any sort of court order NOT allowing the sharing of information to BOTH parents. 

    Check with your principal if you are concerned.  You can also ask the mom if there is a restraining order/court order. Otherwise, would you ignore a dad's email if he did live with the child just didnt have the flexibility to meet with you?  

  • If you are unsure, talk to your principal.
  • I would talk with someone in admin to make sure this really was his dad.  I typically email parents after meeting them in person first.  That is not possible in this case, but it could be good to just make sure the address is legit.

     

     

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  • I think it's a little weird but probably harmless.  Talk to your principal and the teachers from last year.  They will all be able to let you know if it's legit and if it helped/hurt "Jimmy" at all.  
  • I think it's fine, I applaud Joe for reaching out and being proactive. My hubby has a daughter that lives out of state and had to do a similar letter. I agree with the girls verify of course first that Joe is who he says he is, but once you do allow him to be as active as he can be in his child's life. :-)
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  • If his father has joint custody, you are obligated to communicate with him just as you would with any other parent. Definitely check with your principal and his teacher last year (be sure it's actually dad).
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  • I would first check with the front office/guidance to make sure there were no legal issues at hand. If everything checked out ok then I would feel 100% comfortable communicating with the parent.
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  • imagerikkib143:
    I think it's a little weird but probably harmless.  Talk to your principal and the teachers from last year.  They will all be able to let you know if it's legit and if it helped/hurt "Jimmy" at all.  

    You think it is weird that a father would reach out to his child's teacher to ask to be kept in the loop?  OK.....

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  • I find it odd that he is just now writing in November. However, I think initiative is good whenever it takes place. 
  • I think it is OK.  Definitely check everything out, discuss with the principal of your school, and as a safety measure, keep copies of every email sent/received from the parent, in case there are any issues later on.

    Personally, I think it is great a parent wants to be a parent all the time, even though they are not living in the same area as the child, and is being proactively involved in their child's education.

    Anniversary
  • Now, you did post this on the 9 to 5 board... maybe you should have visited the Blended Families one.

    You'd be amazed at how many parents are MIA from their kids' school lives due to being far away.  They want to, but either an initial email or call may have been missed, they never got any answers from previous teachers or schools, or perhaps they are just making the initiative as they truly want to be a part of their child's life.  Maybe they've tried umpteen times and thought direct contact would be one way to go. 

    I don't think this is weird, not at all.  I would, however, definitely contact the principal and the guidance counselor on this and def keep records.  If you go on the BF board you will hear "document, document, document".  I know as a teacher that you do this to begin with (in certain situations are required).

    Glad to hear the father's proactive-I hope it's def a positive thing in this (or any situation) and not some scheme... Good luck to you! 

  • Oh, I see you did go on BF!  Great! 
  • Do you have an official parent contact list? I can access my students records and see who I am allowed to talk to regarding said child. If you don't, you need to verify before you respond or you could be sharing confidential infor with someone who isn't authorized. But this email is not weird at all. You just need to get it verified before you respond. Heck, he could be the bio dad who has lost all rights and isn't allowed any info on his kids. S just check it out first.
  • Definitely check with admin and the counseling dept to see if they have any information regarding the situation and to ensure you are following correct procedure. I don't find this to be an odd situation at all.
  • i wish i had more parents who cared this much, honestly.  i would check with what's on record to make sure it's legit, and then get in contact.  sounds like a dad who's doing his best to stay involved in his kid's education.  i wish there were more of these.
  • I'm confused by this post.  What do you mean "how would I feel"?  I don't see anything wrong with this email.  What is your issue with it, OP?
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