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In case there is a DD
Advice on how to approach him maturely.
now, granted, he already knows i know. and i have texted (as he is out of town) a short list of how hurt i am. 'I' statements i got down.
but what do i do when he comes home tomorrow.
the situation i feel is a little embarrassing. i don't know if i'm being childish, and i probably am to some extent. which is why i need help to argue my case like an adult, not like a 25 year old.
last night i was saving images on his computer. we have three and go between them often, his is the best for games so i tend to use his a lot. when saving, the save window opened up the last save location.
nudes. vaginas. everywhere.
i was fine with that! i found it a little odd because he HID it, though. he has another folder i stumbled upon, but he's a man, it was like 10 pictures, i'm fine with that. but this one was hidden in a folder inside a folder inside a folder all about business, logos and his corporate work.
then i saw, a few pictures down, pictures of my friend. and his ex girlfriend's sister.
they are clothed. and i think that may be why it pisses me off so much. for my friend, he saved few photos of her in a slightly seethrough top. a familly photo where the flash showed her bra a little bit. the picture of his ex's sister is even more bizarre. you can barely see her except her mouth. i guess she was drunk and being silly, but it's clear he saved it because it looks like her mouth is in blowjob position.
a lot of facebook files of people i don't know that he's friends with.
i am livid. everyone remarks how much he worships me. we live together, work a lot, and i KNOW he wouldn't cheat on me. so why the hell is he saving photos secretly of my friend to masturbate to? i feel like he's spit in my face. this isn't just random sluts on the internet. these are women he sees daily. people i hang out with. now i feel paranoia that every woman he talks to, he's looking for something to masturbate to.
another thing is pride. people find me very beautiful, but i gained a lot of weight recently. i was always very busty (E cup at 120 lbs) but now i'm.. rubenesque lol. but the thing is, i'm nothing to sneeze at. it's not like i let myself go.
every chick he saved is someone who has no breasts. at all. and i KNOW he's not attracted to large breasts. and now i'm also insecure wondering how the hell i can have sex with someone and love someone who fantasises about my friends, and about people who look nothing like me KNOWING i was never his type to begin with.
this is long sorry. venting.
but he comes home tomorrow.
now, put on your male brains. how can i CONSTRUCTIVELY frame my case so he'll understand it. what should i say to avoid an argument. what can -I- do to get over it? any advice would be appreciated.
Re: In case there is a DD
I'm going to go put some oranges in the freezer...
She's either totally mental or dumb as a box of rocks. That's the only explanation I can come up with - the circular logic, the absolute codependence, the weird definition of what constitutes maturity/healthy communication... I just can't even reply in that thread anymore.
This might be our first case of someone who needs to step away from the therapist's couch. She clearly isn't learning anything, but thinks she is.
Why dont you guys lighting up on her? If you dont have any good advice to give than Ok but dont belittle people. Does that make you feel better about yourself? Its been months since I've been on this site (exactly for this reason) and I can see nothing has changed. How about trying to help the poor girl? You are right though..... I would'nt know where to start:)
How old are you honey? 25? Are you sure? Just curious, but if your guy is not attracted to big breasts and yours are E's why would he be attracted to you? What is your definition of a "normal" relationship. I think its way different than most. Do you respect yourself? I ask this because your clearly upset and think he is desiring your friends but you want our advise on how to avoid an argument, make him understand your case and (best of all) get yourself over it. If this does not sound insane to you then I do suggest therapy. Hey! If your happy with your relationship then who am I to tell you otherwise? Ignorance is bliss:)
Uhhh.....how old are you? Because you write like you're (as in you+are=you're) 15. If I were in the practice of giving unsolicited advice, I would advise you to consult a grammar book before expecting to be taken seriously around here. Or don't...you know, because ignorance is, after all, bliss.
*Because a
makes even the snarkiest shiit better, right?
Wow that was helpful and insightful.
I suggest a few more months away from this sight for you oh great speaker of wisdom.
This is nitpickery.
All this fuss over a little bit of a bra showing in a picture? All this fuss over flat chested women?
I don't know where to begin on this one.
This isn't circular logic, BIS...this is permanent holding pattern logic.
I like the "mouth stuck in a blowjob position." She made a study on what consitutes a mouth in a blowjob position? Guess so.
BTW. BB -- did you ever get rid of that dead weight you are living with?
Just curious.
*Mouth opens widely*
May I ask why you just HAD to come back here if you thought we were all just such horrible people? I think the best solution to your issue would be to simply remove TIP from your bookmarks and avoid stumbling upon it again. But who am I to use common sense?
Currently Reading: Don Quixote by Miguel De Cervantes
Just to warn you guys, I will be using this phrase in the future.
Not "your" when it should be "you're." Not "its" instead of "it's." That's cliche.
But, "Why don't you guys lightning up on her?" Gold, pure gold.
I'm still trying to figure out what that's supposed to mean in the first place. Did they stop teaching English in school?
I'm pretty sure she meant "lighten." It's beautiful.