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Finance & Relationships

Would you date someone who is financially irresponsible?

I realize this term is vague, but Im curious.

For me, date = yes

Long-term, serious = no

Re: Finance & Relationships

  • If they can learn from their mistakes, sure! If they are repeat offenders and haven't learned a thing, no way.
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  • I'd have to say the same. That sh*t will ruin a relationship.
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  • imageRiver Pestie:
    If they can learn from their mistakes, sure! If they are repeat offenders and haven't learned a thing, no way.

    Agreed! But that would definitely be a huge red flag for me to watch... but then again, I can't just date anyone w/o thinking of it becoming a serious relationship.

  • Depends on their age and if they learned from their mistakes.

    DH made some major mistakes before I met him that had tarnished his credit report, but by the time I met him he paid all of his bills as they came in.

    I don't feel comfortable living beyond my means, so I don't think I could be with someone who could live that way.  I would be nervous that the whole house of cards would fall down.  However, I think I can be too conservative, so I would not pass over someone (like dh) who spends more than I do.

  • imageRiver Pestie:
    If they can learn from their mistakes, sure! If they are repeat offenders and haven't learned a thing, no way.

    Agreed.  I went out with someone who had declared bankruptcy at age 25.  I would have given him the benefit of the doubt but...Hh's living paycheck to paycheck now without health insurance and will blow $300 on a paint job for his car before getting a cavity filled.  He even had the balls to take me to Friendly's for ice cream and ask for $5.  No bueno.

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  • imageHeyNey:

    Would you date someone who is financially irresponsible?

    I realize this term is vague, but Im curious.

    For me, date = yes

    Long-term, serious = no

    I don't want to date someone just for fun so I wouldn't date someone who is financially irresponsible.  If that someone is on the path to cleaning up their finance mess and going forward with healthy financial goals, then yes.

  • I might date them but no long term. Been there, done that, couldn't afford the t-shirt

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  • Well, define financially irresponsible because that could mean a lot.  I would be very wary of this because XH was this way and it's not a good trait. If it was someone who had to file bankruptcy or something in his past but had learned from his mistakes and was doing better then I wouldn't consider that a dealbreaker.  But someone who constantly lived beyond their means, was in debt up to their eyeballs, wanted to spend, spend, spend wouldn't sit well with me.
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  • If they were
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  • If they were currently
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  • Financially irresponsible?  I guess it depends on the degree.  I think achase summed up my feelings pretty well.  I wouldn't want to be with someone who lived above his means, consistently and carelessly.  It wouldn't bother me, however, to date someone who made significantly less money than I did, provided he was self-sufficient, financially-speaking.

    So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

  • wtf nest for just adding those posts like that.

    Anyways. If they currently are irresponsbile and not wanting to change then no. If they want help then yes maybe. I definitely want someone who has the same thoughts on finances as I do.

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  • no.

    I've always found responsibility, in any form, to be very sexy.  Irresponsibility is a major turn off.

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  • imagepbear:

    I might date them but no long term. Been there, done that, couldn't afford the t-shirt

     

     THIS.

  • My BF now used to play pro hockey and he will admit that he was incredibly stupid with his money the first couple years. Now, he doesn't have any credit cards and pays for everything cash. He is really smart with his month now so he learned so it is okay with me. If he was still like that? Absolutely  not.
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  • imageSapphire70:

    no.

    I've always found responsibility, in any form, to be very sexy.  Irresponsibility is a major turn off.

    Agreed!

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  • There are some people who are more irresponsible as a single person than they would be in a relationship. I think it depends on the degree of the problem...

    Most likely I would not get serious with a person who was really bad with money.

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  • No.

    FINAL ANSWER

    ETA: This does not mean I wouldn't date someone who had been affected by the recession. But since you asked about financial irresponsibility, my answer is still a firm NO. 

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