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How long until you felt like you were settled in at a new job
I just started a new job 2.5 weeks ago (my first job in my career field after college). It's very similar to what I was doing while working on my degree, with slightly more freedom and quite a bit higher salary.
I'm having a hard time really feeling comfortable so far. I work in a small department (less than 10 people) who all share one large office space with individual desks (no cubicles) of all women... who like to chitchat and gossip. I am not a chitchat/gossip, so I find it hard to relate to anything that they're talking about.
It's not that I want to be antisocial, but I'm not there to meet my new BFF, I'm there to work, talk with my constituents, and get the job done. I'm not opposed to being friendly with them, but I'm not the type to be friends with coworkers. A bunch of them have FB requested me, and I'm not 100% positive I want to add them, but I don't want to be the wet blanket of the office. They've all been there for much longer, and most of them came over from another business after a round of layoffs, so they've known each other for 3-5 years.
The last two weeks have been a whirlwind of HR paperwork, orientations, meetings, training and more meetings. While I've had information thrown at me, I'm still not confident I could have a conversation with a constituent about what is going on with the organization beyond vague details.
If you made it this far, thank you! Please tell me this too will pass, and eventually I won't feel like the ugly duckling. I may DD this later- you never know who is reading these boards.
Re: How long until you felt like you were settled in at a new job
Everything passes, you just started less than a month ago. I'm just started a new job too (this is my fourth week) and while I've acclimated to my department so far, this department is a lot less social than other jobs I've had.
I agree with not adding co-workers to your FB list - if I ever have to vent about work, I don't want co-workers knowing. I had ONE friend from work that I friended on FB and even that was after a lot of thought - and she's one of my very close friends.
Anyway, no one says you have to be best friends with your co-workers - just treat them cordially. I'm very fortunate that some of my closest friends have been made through the workplace, and even then, those friendships really flourished AFTER I left work.
Just give it time my fellow Michigander.
I started a new job a month ago today and I'd say right now I feel 75% comfortable. But a lot of my uncomfortableness is just the nature of the job--I'm an event planner and work for a university so a good number of the events I had/have coming up had the planning process started by other people. Coming in mid-way through the planning process is difficult. I constantly had to check with my co-workers to see what had/hadn't been done. But now that I've gotten through most of the those events and are about to start fresh with just my own events, I feel a lot better.
I've always worked in higher ed so I agree that it usually takes a year to feel comfortable..to go through the whole calendar, especially since most everything in higher ed is repetative each year.
TI, IUIs, IVF = c/ps and BFNs
It can take days or months to be comfortable in a new position.
In regards to the FB thing, if you aren't comfortable do not add them. If one of them questions you about it just nicely let them know that you prefer to keep your social and work networks separate. I was loose about adding people in the past and have had to block some folks from seeing my page, but that is my policy going forward.
pinterest
I've been around for 11 months and I'm still not comfortable, if by that you mean have friends in the office that I can gossip or have non-business conversations with, or FB friend. I would give myself 6 months to feel confident in my job and the processes that the company uses to get things done.
In the mean time, on the personal front, I would find opportunities to mingle, even if they don't feel comfortable or like a waste of your time. The investment of your personal time is what makes friends and business relationships. It sounds like they're friendly enough with you (or at least nosy enough) to FB friend you. Start off easy by blocking most of their access and see what they post. It might be an excellent ice-breaker into other friendly conversation. GL!