Nestie Spotlight: Shansbride

kayleeb · November 2011

1. Hobbies?

2. Favorite thing about being a mom?

3. Favorite day of the week?

4. Favorite food to cook/bake?

5. Would you prefer a beach vacation or a vacation somewhere mountainous?

WendyToo · November 2011

What are you looking forward to the most about thanksgiving?

Do you do black Friday shopping?

And then I'll break the ice with a category of questions im sure a lot of us want to ask, but don't want to ask.

What has been the most surprising thing about life without Shannon?

BoyMom21 · November 2011

Have you heard from S's mom at all?

Nestie you are the complete opposite of?

Has anyone asked you or said anything that really made you angry lately?

Meal you cook the best?

What's your favorite thing to do when you get time alone?

tbvenable · November 2011

Favorite places to shop for home decor and clothing?

What do you consider the decor style of your house?

ShansBride · November 2011

kayleeb:

1. Hobbies? I like crafting and baking

2. Favorite thing about being a mom? I love seeing my kids interact with eachother. It melts my heart. I also like seeing them disovering new things. I love when I can actually see the lightbulb go off over their heads

3. Favorite day of the week? Wednesday. My bigs have MDO/Pre-K and I get some time to run errands.

4. Favorite food to cook/bake? Cookies. Chocolate chip cookies without the chocolate chips

5. Would you prefer a beach vacation or a vacation somewhere mountainous? Probably mountains because this girl does not look hot in a swimsuit!

ShansBride · November 2011

WendyToo:

What are you looking forward to the most about thanksgiving? Honestly, it being over. I am really dreading dealing with my family. I do like to eat though.

Do you do black Friday shopping? H and I used to go together. This year, my parents are taking my bigs to Dallas, so I think G and I are just going to stay in.

And then I'll break the ice with a category of questions im sure a lot of us want to ask, but don't want to ask. I would like to say I am totally fine with talking about him and his death. I like talking about him actually.

What has been the most surprising thing about life without Shannon? Realizing all the things he did that I didn't realize he did (I guess I realized it, but didn't really acknowldege it--things like taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, changing lightbulbs, etc). My BFF and I used to joke about how if we died our husbands wouldn't be able to function because of all the things we do that they don't even know we do. After he died, I called her and told her it goes both ways.

ShansBride · November 2011

BoyMom21:
Have you heard from S's mom at all? I called her to tell her I was going to keep some of the pictures and mail back the rest and then I called her to tell her after I sent them. I thought about calling her on her birthday a few weeks ago and thought maybe she would call me on his birthday, but she hasn't made any effort. She did say she would like to meet the kids, but I'm not holding my breath or anything.

Nestie you are the complete opposite of? I don't think there is one, really. I have a lot of similarities with most everyone.

Has anyone asked you or said anything that really made you angry lately? My parents have been really making me mad with always talking about how much it sucks that S died. I know it sucks, but I am trying to find good in and not dwell on the bad.

Meal you cook the best? I am not a super great cook, but I can do pasta. There isn't much you can mess up with pasta dishes.

What's your favorite thing to do when you get time alone? I have a few friends who don't live in Oklahoma and I love when the kids go to bed and we can just chat on the phone.

ShansBride · November 2011

tbvenable:

Favorite places to shop for home decor and clothing? Probably Target on both. I don't have a lot of home decor stuff though.

What do you consider the decor style of your house? Contemorarily eclectic maybe? I like really contemporary stuff and H liked traditional so we sort of tried to mesh the two together. I think it's pretty minimalist too.

WendyToo · November 2011

And since you're a captive audience today and the resident expert, I'll ask a selfish question for me: now that more children is a possibility (and in the long term plan), what doctor/hospital would you recommend if I wanted to keep the option of a vbac on the table? I'll be moving to far east OKC in the next year or two (before another baby) if that influences your decision.

And some more background,

Were you induced with V?

Did you do any meds with that labor?

Is med-free a requirement for a vbac? (I was induced and I don't think there's any way I could have done that med-free, but I do think I'm stronger mentally and physically now, so who knows, but that is seriously my biggest fear about a vbac).

ShansBride · November 2011

WendyToo:

And since you're a captive audience today and the resident expert, I'll ask a selfish question for me: now that more children is a possibility (and in the long term plan), what doctor/hospital would you recommend if I wanted to keep the option of a vbac on the table? I'll be moving to far east OKC in the next year or two (before another baby) if that influences your decision.

OU. That is the only hopsital where every doctor and midwife oversees VBAC. Anyhwere else (St. Anthony, Moore Medical) if your doc isn't there you will have to fight to not get sectioned. Keep in mind though, there are some changes happening with VBAC and ACOG now so you might (hopefully will) have more options in the next couple of years

And some more background,

Were you induced with V? Nope. I had a scheduled c/s at 38 weeks for a breech baby.

Did you do any meds with that labor? no labor

Is med-free a requirement for a vbac? (I was induced and I don't think there's any way I could have done that med-free, but I do think I'm stronger mentally and physically now, so who knows, but that is seriously my biggest fear about a vbac). no, not a requirement at all. Actually, in our VBAC group, I think there have been about 10 VBACs and 7 of them were medicated (mostly epidural). My reasoning for wanting med-free is first, because I wanted to be able to feel my body. If my uterus was ruptering I wanted to know it! I also feel like one intervention leads to another and to another and to another and would land me back on the operating table. Plus, the risk of rupture is higher (though not a ton) with pitocin and I know that more often then not epidurals relax the uterus so it stops contracting meaning you get pit (and then the pit contacts the uterus too much making the baby go into distress which gets you a ticket to the OR). I don't mean to sound like drugs are lal bad, they are not and they can sometimes help labor, but it just wasn't a road I wanted to go down if I could avoid it.

Also, I want to add that labor doesn't have to be painful. My labor and birth with M didn't hurt at all. Really. As her head/hand came out it stung a bit, but was never excruciating. I never once thought I wanted drugs. (that is not to say that I am some super woman or anything, but just that not all labors are painful--if someone had offered me drugs while I was actually pushing G out I would have taken them in a heartbeat!)

WendyToo · November 2011

ShansBride:
WendyToo:

And since you're a captive audience today and the resident expert, I'll ask a selfish question for me: now that more children is a possibility (and in the long term plan), what doctor/hospital would you recommend if I wanted to keep the option of a vbac on the table? I'll be moving to far east OKC in the next year or two (before another baby) if that influences your decision.

OU. That is the only hopsital where every doctor and midwife oversees VBAC. Anyhwere else (St. Anthony, Moore Medical) if your doc isn't there you will have to fight to not get sectioned. Keep in mind though, there are some changes happening with VBAC and ACOG now so you might (hopefully will) have more options in the next couple of years

And some more background,

Were you induced with V? Nope. I had a scheduled c/s at 38 weeks for a breech baby.

Did you do any meds with that labor? no labor

Is med-free a requirement for a vbac? (I was induced and I don't think there's any way I could have done that med-free, but I do think I'm stronger mentally and physically now, so who knows, but that is seriously my biggest fear about a vbac). no, not a requirement at all. Actually, in our VBAC group, I think there have been about 10 VBACs and 7 of them were medicated (mostly epidural). My reasoning for wanting med-free is first, because I wanted to be able to feel my body. If my uterus was ruptering I wanted to know it! I also feel like one intervention leads to another and to another and to another and would land me back on the operating table. Plus, the risk of rupture is higher (though not a ton) with pitocin and I know that more often then not epidurals relax the uterus so it stops contracting meaning you get pit (and then the pit contacts the uterus too much making the baby go into distress which gets you a ticket to the OR). I don't mean to sound like drugs are lal bad, they are not and they can sometimes help labor, but it just wasn't a road I wanted to go down if I could avoid it.

Also, I want to add that labor doesn't have to be painful. My labor and birth with M didn't hurt at all. Really. As her head/hand came out it stung a bit, but was never excruciating. I never once thought I wanted drugs. (that is not to say that I am some super woman or anything, but just that not all labors are painful--if someone had offered me drugs while I was actually pushing G out I would have taken them in a heartbeat!)

Thanks. I just needed to know it was an option.

With Connor the epidural didn't slow my labor at all, but I did have pitocin and he did start to go into distress (and had some head swelling due to my cervical swelling).

5thOfJuly · November 2011

1. What's your favorite personality trait about each of your children?

2. What's your favorite personality trait in yourself?

3. What was your favorite personality trait in S?

4. Where are we most likely to find you and what would you be doing at: 2pm on a Tuesday? 9pm on a Friday? 10am on a Sunday?

llizzyb · November 2011

1. Was your scheduled C-section experience awful? Or was it just something you'd rather not do again, and let your body do what comes naturally for subsequent pregnancies?

2. Do you have any recommendations for baby carriers for me? (Totally selfish question, sorry).

3. Describe your personality in three words.

4. I love birth order theories: Where did S fall in his family? You? Do you think that impacted your marriage relationship in anyway?

ShansBride · November 2011

5thOfJuly:

1. What's your favorite personality trait about each of your children? V has such a good heart. He is always looking out for others (well, most of the time anyway). M has her daddy's sense of humor. She is always making me laugh. G works really really hard to get what she wants. And she is always smiling.

2. What's your favorite personality trait in yourself? I think my greatest asset is probably also by the worst thing and that is that I am stubborn.

3. What was your favorite personality trait in S? Probably his sense of humor. He was really funny. And he was really forgiving. I always admired his ability to forgive.

4. Where are we most likely to find you and what would you be doing at: 2pm on a Tuesday? probably a playdate somewhere

9pm on a Friday? at home, either chatting with friends or folding laundry

10am on a Sunday? ideally, leaving church, but most liking rushing to get to the late church service

ShansBride · November 2011

llizzyb:

1. Was your scheduled C-section experience awful? Or was it just something you'd rather not do again, and let your body do what comes naturally for subsequent pregnancies? Honestly, it was pretty bad. I don't think it had to be though. If I would have known more I would have done things differently to make it better.

2. Do you have any recommendations for baby carriers for me? (Totally selfish question, sorry). I think the most versitile carrier is a ring sling (love the ones locally made by Babywearing Doula Piper Nard in Edmond). I use my at all ages and it goes on and off really easily. If you are only going to get one, I'd make it a ring sling. If you are open to having a few, I really like a wrap style (maya wrap, ultimate baby wrap) for newborns, but it is sort of hard to nurse in if you are planning on breastfeeding. It also takes a longer time to put on and get off. Mei Tai style is my favorite for about 4 months to 12 months depending on the size of your baby, and then I use the ring sling for toddlers. Piper makes all of the styles though, and she offers a babywearing class where you can try them all out too!

3. Describe your personality in three words. loyal, determined, honest

4. I love birth order theories: Where did S fall in his family? You? Do you think that impacted your marriage relationship in anyway? he was an only and I am the oldest. I was more of the leader in our relationship most of the time and it took him a while to learn to share. We were both really stubborn and always thought we were right

Nestie Spotlight: Shansbride

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