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I think I need to make an appointment...
I've always had severe anxiety (ALWAYS- I had seizures at 2/3 because I "overreacted" to falls). Through the years I've also turned into a mild hypochondriac. I say mild because I'll freak out and think I have some serious illness, then can talk myself out of it pretty quickly.
Lately though it's gotten worse. I'm not sure how it happened, it's been so gradual. It hit me the other day when I was watching "Mystery Diagnosis" with a friend. I started (mentally) freaking out. I don't even remember what it was over.
My Mom got food poisioning a few weeks ago and now I HATE the thought of eating out because I'm firmly convinced I'll get it.
And trust me- I can admit how stupid and ridiculous this is. However, it's getting harder and harder to talk myself out of it.
Nothing major in my life has caused this to happen- there's been no drastic change. Same medications, same job, same friends...maybe I'm afraid that life is too good so I'm expecting something horrible to happen? (I do have a tendancy to do that as well) I don't know. All I know is I'm making an appointment with my therapist and psychatrist. I'm kicking this in the butt before it gets to a point where it controls me.
For years I let my anxiety control me and take over my life- I'm NEVER doing that again. Ever. It was hell.
Sorry, I don't know why I posted all this. I guess I just needed to get it out there. I'm generally a pretty rational person- I know how much emotions can mess with you, so I don't base my life off them. Then when my emotions get out of control it's kinda scary.
And also sorry if this is a little rambly.
Re: I think I need to make an appointment...
Are you under more stress at work? Having a stressful time in your relationships?
Most of those shows make it so easy to convince yourself that you have some horrible disease. It will say something like, "The symptoms of the deadly icky virus is a headache and pain in your right butt cheek." Then all of a sudden your right butt cheek starts hurting.
Call your doctor or a therapist (EAP?) and set up an appointment. Tell them exactly what you said here. Nothing to be ashamed of, everyone has a quirk.
I think that you should print out what you said above and bring it with you when you go see your doc or therapist this way you wont leave any of the above out when you talk to them.
No change in stress levels- work's amazing, friends are great- still non-existant love life but I'm honestly OK with that. haha
I'm on Prozac & Wellbutrin already- I'm thinking the therapist is my best bet. I saw her for a while after my divorce, but when I lost my job last time I had to quit (not making enough $ at the new job and not having insurance on top of that)- now that I've gotten a raise I'll be able to budget her in again.
You and I are anxiety twins. I have ALWAYS been anxious and easily upset over minor changes/perceived failures/and constantly thinking the worst is right around the corner. They are hard thoughts to control, even when you KNOW you are being totally irrational.
Yes, make an appointment. My therapist has helped me immensely, and although I still think like a maniac sometimes, I have more good days than bad now, and it can only get better. Your whole life changes when you learn to see things more positively and I really hope you can find someone to help you make peace with your thoughts.
I think your therapist is your best bet too.
I've seen someone off and on for the last 5 years and have my anxiety under control that even when it flares up, I don't let that make me more anxious, which was a big step for me.
I hope you're able to get in to see your therapist soon and that the sessions are helpful!