My mum can't quite manage her life. What to do?

I'm starting to worry about my mom, but I don't know what to do. My mum has always been really spontaneous, which is usually great, and not so good with finances, which is never great, but she's been getting a lot worse since my dad died. She's very young, only 61, and her family has zero history of dementia or Alzheimer's, so it's hard to imagine that her mind is going, but it's still on the list of concerns because of the steady decrease in her decision-making.

What she did lately was, after several years with her house on the market trying to move to a nearby city so she'd be near vital services and spend less on gas, she decided to put her house up for rental and rent out an apartment halfway across the country near her father and siblings. Seems reasonable? She decided to do this after her sister recommended an apartment out of the blue, which she then signed a 6-month lease on, starting only two weeks later, without visiting it in person.She did this without talking to me about it, even though she'd spent the two months prior begging me to purchase plane tickets to visit her home for the holidays (I asked her to visit me and my family since she lives alone), so for all she knew I could've bought expensive holiday plane tickets out there that would suddenly be useless. Fortunately, I hadn't. Her move also would make it harder to visit me and mine, but we agreed to not do that this year.

In fairness to her, at least she didn't sign her lease or anything before she got her renter to sign his. But that's primarily because her boyfriend is an experienced landlord who gave her his basic lease. She told me that she was "glad to have the lease, but I just completely trust" her renter. And the boyfriend? He said he's okay with her moving halfway across the country since he's rich and can visit every couple months...but he's already somewhat unhappy with it, and she barely consulted him, despite telling me a month ago that they'd upgraded their relationship to permanent.

She also bought a really nice car trailer to haul her clothes and stuff in, since she's leaving her furniture in her outbuildings back home anyway. I guess that's a pretty good decision, except the trailer cost several hundred dollars ... and she told me once she arrived that she'd decided to hire movers instead. Because she doesn't "have anyone to help", except she moved there to be close to her 5 brothers who are all younger than her and lifelong farmers, big guys. So the trailer was used and not returnable, and the movers cost another several hundred dollars. And she bought all-new furniture anyway! If she were going to hire movers, she could've at least moved her furniture. Some of it definitely needed replacing because my dad was the opposite of her and irrationally refused to buy things they needed, but she's an all or nothing person.

She also gave away her cat of several years to a friend because the cat wouldn't like an apartment, which is true and fair. This is after purchasing a(n expensive) purebred puppy a year ago then giving him away to a neighbor kid because he was too much energy for her, then adopting an adult dog a few months ago, then giving him back because she couldn't control him. At least she's in an apartment now and can't spontaneously bring home animals who she'll halfway abandon. She has had one small dog and that cat the whole time, so she's not lonely.

Now that she's there, she already told me she's not sure if she likes it. She just decided she's going to try to visit me and my family over the holidays, despite the big price jumps happening lately, and despite okaying me to leave her alone this holiday because she'd already made plans to visit me in only 2 months for my birthday, plus of course she's surrounded by her family so she's not alone. But no, she's told me she's broke from moving, buying a trailer, hiring movers, buying all-new furniture, but now she's gonna pay another several hundred bucks to fly back across the country to see me, when she had before refused to do that.

Money-wise, this is NOT affordable for her. I realize for some people it might be affordable, if not necessarily advisable. Her apartment costs about the same as she makes in rent on her old place, so her bills are all the same (yes, utilities and all were all worked out by her boyfriend; renter pays them). Good. But these incidental expenses based on her stupid, spontaneous decision? "Oh, I have a home equity line of credit. This will only cost me another $50 per month to pay back". Maybe. But credit is unreliable, home equity is complex at best and she's certainly not building any by renting it out and not putting any money into it (the renter may buy it though). She has the $50/month, but honestly, barely. She's pretty close to just scraping by. She refuses to work even part-time, has never worked more than part-time, has never used her degree, and wanted to pursue a master's last year on student loans, which I was able to talk her out of based on whether it would pay for itself (no way, because she won't work, even if it could) and whether, if she needed the challenge, she could just take a cool job (she said yes, but didn't). She's not eligible for Medicare yet and the state won't give her insurance because she's too young and refuses to work even part-time (new state might, but she's probably too proud to apply; her family would eat her alive for doing it), so her health insurance costs almost all her money. She doesn't even get all the meds she needs to be comfortable, although at least she gets all the necessary ones, because those still cost several hundreds of dollars a month, which of course she can't afford, but that $50 is still $50 between her and her meds.

This is a very judgmental rant, believe me, I know. I'm torn between judging her and worrying intensely. In fact, the worrying makes the judging worse, because there's nothing I can do to help her but I focus on it anyway. Please, does anyone know how to convince a parent with poor life skills to consult them before making large decisions? Or to get help from real people? She had a financial counselor for awhile who her friends recommended, but her snobby friends recommended a guy who was basically a stock broker, so not someone prepared to counsel a brokeass old lady who can barely manage her utility bills let alone her late husband's retirement accounts. I canNOT help her financially. My SO and I are moving across the country ourselves soon, and I work a shitty job because I have to go back to college, since she refused to pay for my last semester after my dad died and I was only eligible for new loans with variable uncapped interest due to her high "income" (that loan, spontaneously pulling money out of retirement, etc), terrible credit as a cosigner and my being a semester behind from caring for my dad and loans hate 5th year seniors. Anyway. We're broke. So's she. But at least we largely  make good financial decisions, and she won't listen to us about doing that too.