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Two weeks from today (this is whiny and AWish but I need some love)
This time in 2 weeks I will on a flight from London back home...for good. My visa is up and I have to leave and I am dreading it. I want to get all my whining out here because a) I know you'll understand and b) I'm trying to cry less around BF because when we're together, I think about how in such a short time we won't be able to hang out whenever we want anymore, and I cry. I do not want him thinking I am crazy (although he has been so good about it).
I'm happy to be going back for Christmas (especially since BF is coming too), but once the holidays are over and he goes back to Scotland, I kind of feel like I'll fall into a big void of depression.
I don't have a job to go to, I'll be living at my parents with my sister (who you all know I am not a fan of). I have 2 friends left in the whole city and one of them is going to be moving early in the year.
Every time I try to pack or organize my things, I end up crying because it seems impossible to me to leave my life here, and I'll never be coming back.
BF has told me that he wants to be with me and while it'll be hard, we'll stay together and Skype and see each other when we can, but then I feel like it's only a matter of time before he finds someone here.
I know that this is massively whiny, but I need to get all this crap out. And if anyone has inspirational stories of how they maintained long distance relationships and lived happily ever after, I'd love to hear.them. And...ya know, puppies and rainbows and smiles will all be nice too.
Re: Two weeks from today (this is whiny and AWish but I need some love)
Meggers, I don't have any tips for you or any good advice but I have a "smile" for you...
Awww meggers hon--that sounds so hard and so emotionally draining. I know how much you have enjoyed your time abroad and I really hope things work out for you, professionally and personally.
You sound like you have a great BF and even though it will be hard to be apart, I really believe you guys can make it work with some extra effort. Good luck my dear and know we're here for you IN or not!
My Israel Blog!
Meggers:
I was in your exact situation a few years ago. I was living in Spain but I only had a student visa. I tried really hard to find a job but nobody wanted to do the paperwork so that I could get my working papers. I had to go back to the States after five years of living abroad. I was lucky enough that I was able to live with my parents in their house and that I got a job a week later. However, I did leave behind my BF and it was really hard to move back after living abroad for so many years. I had like two or three friends but I really didnt fit in.
So I think you can be as whiny as you want. This situation sucks. However, I am glad that I went back because I managed to get a really cool job. And I did end up marrying my BF and moving back here. Going back home, will help you step back and look at your life a bit. You can evaluate what you want in life. Sometimes job options are better in your home country. Maybe, you can go back to school or start a cool new hobby. Maybe, you and will BF will realize that you want to get married.
Sending you lots of hugs and vibes!!!!!
Boo
There is always marriage
HA! This was what I was going to say. Worked for us
Sorry you're feeling blue though.
I agree with dulcemaria.
I was also in this same situation several years ago. It was tough to leave but my relationship with my now DH grew so much while we were apart, we knew that if our relationship could make it through that, we could make it through anything
. Plus, although I was dreading moving back home after years of independence (like you), I found a great job which gave me what proved to be invaluable experience. So, in the end, it all turned out for the best.
So, hang in there, stay strong, good things will come from this move I sure of it. Don't look at it as the end, just as another step in life's ladder.
**Hugs** I know it's tough, but you're strong meggers, and if you at any time are starting to lose hope or feeling especially down, you know we'll be right here to raise your spirits
Irish-that is one gorgeous baby.
Thank you ladies so much! I really try to stay positive about it, and BF has told me in no uncertain terms that he wants to be with me, so at least I have that. He also has plans to come to Canada again for my birthday in a few months.
I'm hoping that in the new year I can really focus on getting a job that I enjoy. I have no idea what that is, but it will be better than the temping I've been doing for the past couple of years. I know I could get around the living at home with sister issue by moving out, but my short term goal is to find a job and save as much money as I can for both travel to visit BF, and also hopefully to buy a place to live.
Ugh it's not like I didn't know this day was coming for a very long time, but it's still so hard to leave the entire amazing life I've built here.
I'm so lucky to have you guys
Us, too
We spent one year long distance while we were engaged. It sucked, I don't wish it on anyone. But you CAN get through it to the other side so don't give up on him just yet.
We've only been at it for two months, but Skype is amazing. The two weeks I was in Antarctica with no high-speed internet were actually the hardest time for us, because we were so used to "seeing" each other every day. We'll actually just carry the iPad or laptop into the kitchen while we're making dinner or leave it on if we're working, because that way we can just be together and feel like we're in the same place.
I wish I had some more long-term wisdom, but I'm new to this too!
My FI and I have been together for 6 years and we've never lived together. I know what leaving feels like. Trust me, it will be hard but it is do-able. Skype is a life saver in this situation! Just know that any time you are feeling down, you can come post on here and get some happy vibes from us
Oh, and I like the sound of that marriage idea as well ; )
Rambley Blog
Sending (((big hugs))) your way, meggers! If there is will and want and love on both sides, you two will make it work
Stay strong, we're here for you! Think of all of your new possibilities
Ahh, meggers, you're not being whiny and AWish. You're handling it better than I would, probably.
I have no other words to offer you than: You'll figure it out. You'll put your life in Canada together. You'll figure it out with your man. As much as it feels like the end of your life as you know it, it's not.
Somewhere, some day, everything will kick ass.
My goodness that isn't whiny at all, I would be devastated if I had to leave that too! When we left South Africa I went through a mourning period as well, it is tough when you love somewhere so much.
DH and I have done a lot of long distance, it is tough but sometimes it makes the relationship that much stronger, good luck!
Sorry Meggers :-( Edinburgh is at it's least lovely right now though so it's a good time to escape. I'm sure it will be lovely having the holidays with your boyfriend and family but I know it will be hard after.
You are a hard worker and I'm sure have learned a lot while temping (seriously, best job training ever! I temped for a couple years and it was amazing what you can pick up) so I know you'll find something amazing! ((hugs))
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks, Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks
Hi Meggers! I was in your position a few years ago - headed home to my parents without a job lined up and a boyfriend back in Norway. It was hard. Really hard but doable. The worst was not knowing when I would see him again so having a plane ticket (or him having a plane ticket) even 6 months in advance helped a lot! My laptop was old and didn't have wireless and my parents did not have a good enough internet connection to make skype usable. What helped then was writing letters. I probably wrote a letter about my day every evening before I went to bed and then mailed a week's worth every week. DH says reading those letters helped him stay connected to my life and to me despite the fact that we never saw each other on skype. Being active/staying busy also really helped me while we were on separate continents.
It is doable!