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working moms, talk to me about schedules
How do you do everything? Can you talk to me about a normal day schedule for you?
This is mine so far without DH since he's not always home (and this is based on 1 1/2 weeks back to work). I've cooked a meal on Sundays that have lasted until Wednesday... so all I have to do is microwave it.
5:30- wake up & pump
6- shower & get dressed
6:30- get my bags organized (clean pump parts & pack them up)/ boil water for oatmeal & tea, feed animals
6:45- wake S up, change & nurse her
7- let dog out & get everything packed in the car
I drop S off by 7:30 & get to work by 8.
I get out of work at 4:30, get to my car by 4:45... pick S up at 5:15 & home by 5:30/5:40. I have to walk the dog and then I play with her for a bit, nurse her a few times and then she's in bed at 7:30. I have to factor in bath & reading time into that equation too.
Last night, I ate after I put her to bed since I wanted to optimize my time with her. After I put her to bed, I clean out my bags and pack my lunch for the next day. I pump once before I go to bed.
I guess after she goes to bed & I do those other things I should do laundry (especially once we start CDing... any day now)... I haven't done laundry all week. Eek. I know there are other things that should get done that aren't and that's ok... and it's obviously easier if DH is home...
I know things will get easier... but holy hell, that's non-stop all day! I'm trying to figure out how I can run errands after work or make something for dinner ...
Re: working moms, talk to me about schedules
When James was that little, we put him to bed later since he would wake up a bunch anyway. If he took a late afternoon snooze, I'd either sleep myself or do a few chores. I didn't have to be up as early as you, so that might have affected our schedule. It was certainly easier with DH around to help with chores and holding James while I made dinner. (I tried to keep a few freezer meals like stuffed shells, meat sauce, and soups at the ready just in case.)
At S's age, James was still too little for the sling (which I plan on making yours in the next couple of weekends, I swear!) but I LOVED my mei tai carrier that allowed him to be on my chest hands free while I did stuff. The evenings were rough because it was his tough time of day where he probably wanted to nurse the whole night and was generally cranky. Wearing him helped with that too- I could stand at the stove, swaying and cooking, which kept him nearby and happier.
And really, sometimes I had to plop him in the swing or baby bouncer seat because I just plain needed to get a few things done. Sometimes that meant letting him cry for 10 minutes while I was right there. You've gotta do what you've gotta do to get things done.
We bottle fed so that was so much easier. I have always had to be to work at 8 so I would get up t 615, shower/dress, then get T ready about 645. 7 am was downstairs with a bottle and feeding/letting the dogs out. We were out the door by 730 (725 if I wanted Dunkin).
At night, it hasn't changed. I pick T up around 445 and get home around 5. We hang out for about a half hour before I head to the kitchen to do dishes and start dinner. We eat around 630 (when DH gets home from work) and then more hanging out from 7-730. Bath starts at 730 and she's usually in bed just before 8. Then I internet/tv/whatever until I go to sleep, about 9/930.
Mornings now are different, where I work from home. I'm up at 715, shower and am downstairs getting my breakfast and dealing with the dog about 735. I dress T (every day except Wednesdays, I have to drive to the office so DH is in charge) and put her back in her crib for playtime while DH showers. They head downstairs right about 8 am when I start work.
I just have to say that, having a kid is non stop. I used to be able to take a nap after work then fix supper. not anymore now of course! lol
I also don't cater to T's schedule (like some mom's are adamant that their kid have a nap at whatever time every day, etc). Meaning that if I need to get something done, I do it. I'll take her into account of course, but if I need to go to the store, I do it after work, after I've gotten her. I'll make the trip shorter if she is in a bad mood, but she has always been really flexible. She has let me run her around all day and still seems to be ok. I know not every kid is like mine, but it sure helps!
When he was that age this was our schedule:
6:00 wake, I shower and Seth gets him dressed
6:30 nurse and pump at the same time (I never cleaned my pump parts until I got hom at night)
7:00 out the door (I would often spend a lot of time at daycare. Sometimes I woud nurse him, just play, sit and chat)
7:30-8:00 work
10:00 pump
1:00 pump
3:30 pump
4:00 leave for DC
4:30 nurse
5:30 start dinner
7:15 bed time starts
He only gets a bath twice a week.
It was definitely overwhelming at first! I can only imagine how it must feel to be doing it on your own right now. We got up around 6:45, would nurse in bed; MH would get him ready while I showered and got ready, get my pump and bottles ready, and take him to daycare at 8am, work by 8:30am.
Left work at 4:30, pick him up, home around 5pm. Nurse, take care of milk/pump parts, work on dinner, throw diapers in the wash, etc. For the first 6 months, I did not do a bedtime or bedtime routine. I kept him downstairs with us until we went to bed. He pretty much slept til 7-10pm and then went in his bed, but I just felt like my time with him was so limited that I needed those three hours of holding him or watching him sleep. Then I'd nurse him and put him in his bed and went to bed myself.
Maybe you could take advantage of some help from family or friends on the weekend and do some extra cooking/cleaning so you don't have to worry about it as much during the week?
My morning routine is a bit different because DH takes care of Adrian. We wake at 6:45, nurse. 7:00 is potty and book routine. Then take care of cats, dog, chickens. Then check the Email to see if had any cancellations for the morning and could go in later. Usually no luck with that, so I make breakfast for everyone (including DH...because I want to, not because I have to), clean up the dishes, pack my lunch, throw in a load of laundry, get Adrian dressed, wake DH up (He goes to bed at 1:30am after his shift). And out the door at 8:30.
Although my morning routine is more lax than most since I don't have to go do daycare drop off, my evenings make up for it. As much as DH tries, he just can't multitask. He takes excellent care of the baby but really struggles with doing any housework at the same time. On my hardest day coming home, I get home between 6:15 and 6:30 (thankfully just once a week) and kiss DH goodbye as he goes to his martial arts class. I finish feeding the baby, do bath, play for a bit, bedtime routine and he's in bed by 8. Then I spend about a couple hours cleaning the mess from the day, folding laundry, cook for the next day, doing dishes, etc. DH is really working hard on trying to get more helpful...but I think it takes him all day to just clean up after breakfast and lunch while chasing a little one. Just getting home an hour earlier on other days really makes a difference.
What has really helped us is making double and triple batches of everything when I cook. We always eat leftovers for a couple days and we have a portion to freeze. And then I pull out the freezer stash on those long days.
When I went back to work, we decided together that it wasn't worth it with me working so much with DH's horrendous work schedule (tons of overtime is required...plus he gets ordered for overnight shifts and such). I am fortunate that I've been able to reduce my work hours by 12 hours less than my former full time status. Even though I've reduced my hours, I think I will always struggle emotionally that I have to work. I long to stay home full time.
I felt like I couldn't remember enough details of when Eli was an infant to answer this but I'm forcing myself to as a memory exercise in prep for #2!
Up at 5:00, showered and had breakfast. Got Eli up around 5:30 to nurse and get dressed (once he started solid foods he didn't get that until we got to daycare.) Leave by 6:30. Drop off at daycare and head to work. I pumped twice a day- around 8:30 and 12:30. I get out of work at 2:30 most days, so I would pick him up an head home. Nurse when we got home around 3:30. The DCP we had at the time was weird about naps, so sometimes he would go down for a nap around 4. Otherwise he would hang out in his bouncer, jumperoo, etc for a few minutes while I put things away, started laundry, etc. Played, nursed, then bedtime stuff around 7 or 8.
I agree it's no-stop and it never really ends. Even now at 2.5 I get some more downtime and am able to get more stuff done while he's occupied, but it's still chaotic. You'll settle into a routine that works for you!