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Ducks in a row.
So after my domestic violence fiasco, I'm getting myself straight and getting all of my ducks in a row. BF and I have been speaking, but spending a lot of time away from each other. We talked about working it out, but I told him that we need to sit and discuss our relationship because I'm not sure it's the best place for us to be right now. We will be having that discussion this week sometime when we can make some time to sit with each other. I'm thinking about taking a break, or at least limiting our time together for a while so we can both get the help we need.
Today I called my attorney and asked why the heck I haven't received my divorce paperwork in the mail when they said they sent it one month ago. Oh, because my attorney sucks and he never sent it. "Will be sending it today" he says. Well get on that shiit, please. I actually requested that he emails me a .pdf so I can print it, sign it, and get it notarized. Let's get a move on, please.
I called 5 psychologists today, looking for someone new. No one is taking new patients, or if they are they do not fit into my schedule. I'm waiting on one woman to call me back because she is interested, but I don't think she accepts my insurance. Go figure. Hopefully I can get that worked in soon.
I also called and made some medical appointments. I have been having some OBGYN issues and my back is really messed up again, so I called and made an appointment with my gyno and with my neuro surgeon to make sure I don't need surgery again on my spine.
I also had a fantastic job interview yesterday. Fantastic. I'm waiting for them to work out the financial aspect of the offer and call me and let me know if I can take it or not. It's a company I used to work for 6 years ago, got laid off, and now they opened a new office in NYC and I'd be doing work for that office out of my area as an offload technician. I asked for my leaving salary, which is $4 an hour more than their starting salary, but I ROCKED that interview and I know the people interviewing me so I think they're really trying to make the money situation happen so I could leave my current dead end job.
Other than that, I'd like to crawl in a ball and sleep for the next week. My body hurts so bad from that fight that I feel like I got hit by a truck. I had some friend therapy last night with my two girlfriends and just sat and cried for a few hours. I just feel terrible about the person I turned into at that moment. I don't think that my BF was right in what he did by raising his voice and intruding in my personal space in the shower, but what I did wasn't right by any means. I turned into a monster. He really is a good man, but we have some communication issues, and I'm hopeful that we can work it out, make some space in our lives for ourselves, and work on our shiit separately. I really do see a future with him WAYYYYYYYYY down the road.
Anyone have any advice on how to choose a psychologist? I don't know anyone currently in therapy, so I can't ask for references. I've been basically going down the list of who my insurance covers and calling each one. How do I know if they're good or not? My current therapist sucks. I hate going to him, and he doesn't help me at all. Our meetings make me very frustrated.
Re: Ducks in a row.
I go to a licsensed social worker and have had great experience with her. There have been some threads about the difference between a psychologist, LSW and a few others who practice talk therapy. For me, it was a matter of finding someone who had night hours and took my insurance and less about their degree.
Glad you're getting things in order. Best of luck!
I got an appointment with a new psychologist for tomorrow. Thankfully there was a cancellation or I would have to wait until after the new year. I'm going to try him out for a few sessions to see if we fit.
Also my post nuptual agreement is in.my.hands! Yeah! That is two good things about today.
I'm quasi clear-headed today and focused. I don't feel good about myself at all, but I'm making a concious effort to succeed.
Thank you for your support.