Starting Over
dmndsr4eva
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
What is the deal with men who can't keep it in their pants?
I know this is such a general debate. I do feel like I have finally found someone who I can fully trust. However, he did tell me that at the end of his marriage he knew he needed to get out fast or he was going to end up cheating. Because him and his wife had no intimacy. He did say that he tried talking to her and fixing things to no avail.
Obviously my ex was in the same boat where he was so horndog crazy over his coworker that he either did cheat or had to hastily get rid of me so he could bone her.
Why are men this way?
"How often does the other woman get a happy ending?" Chuck Bass, Gossip Girl
Re: What is the deal with men who can't keep it in their pants?
Head--------------------------> Desk
This isn't an 'all men are cheating bastards' problem, this is a 'you have bad taste in men and need to work on it' problem.
Have you ever posted anything on here about your life and/ or current bf where you weren't given the same advice? Everyone here has told you repeatedly that it is too soon to be in a new relationship and this dude has way too many red flags anyway, but you respond by saying he's hot- so what exactly are you looking for?
Either DTMFA or accept that you are bound to end up as miserable in this relationship as you were in your last one.
There are many many many men out there that cheats!
You need to create boundries to what you allow to put up with and the type of men you hang out with to avoid cheating men if that is what you desire. If you can't recognize which men cheats and which men doesn't, therapy will help with you in this department.
The fact that you state you've "found someone you can fully trust" followed by telling us how he was thisclose to cheating before he got out of his marriage is just further proof of how NOT READY you are to date. Why would you trust someone who said that?
You give me a headache.
When I realized that I could see how people cheated because their spouse wasn't providing any kind of intimacy whatsoever, I knew it was time to leave.
I'm female for the record.
Yup. This. All of it.
3/12 5 mi -- 49:22 Pace: 9:52
5/1 Half Marathon -- 2:11:22 Pace: 10:01
5/22 10k -- 56:29 Pace: 9:00
5/24 3.6 -- 29:03 Pace: 8:18
7/10 15k -- 1:44:46 injured Pace: 11:14
10/29 5k -- 28:24 Pace: 9:04
Agreed. I don't know that this necessarily makes him a bad person as long as he REALLY learned from it. I know it was a huge wake-up call for me, and I vow to make every effort to never put myself in a relationship where he or I would allow our intimacy to deteriorate to that point. I think that's a huge part of being self-aware.
I'm with you guys. If he really, truly was not getting any intimacy, even after trying everything he could to fix it, then I can see how the temptation would be there. And it's a good thing if he recognized it and got out of the marriage before cheating happened.
That being said, it can be used as an easy excuse. "Oh, poor me, my W wouldn't pay any attention to me, so I HAD to hook up with the OW!" when in all reality, perhaps the DW was trying to keep his interest, but he wasn't interested anymore. Or, in this case, perhaps the guy was tempted to cheat because he's a DB, not necessarily because he wasn't getting any from his XW.
Diamonds, you have some DEEP issues. One of them is not listening to the sound advice you're getting here.
And your post makes no sense. 1st part is basically "he is a great guy!" and 2nd part is "and he can't keep it in his pants and admitted he would cheat".
This was the case in my marriage, too.