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Is it me or is this stupid?
So my office is planning a 'family day'. A chance for everyone to bring their partners/spouses/kids and meet each other with drinks, snacks and a speech by the boss. I actually think it's kindof a cool idea, since we're a small organization and all know eachothers partners/kids names and we're all so involved in our jobs.
They're planning it on a weekday, just after regular Dutch school hours, from 3.30 'til 6ish.
I think this is stupid. This means FO will have to take a half day off work to meet my co-workers and not even get dinner or something.
I mentioned this in our management meeting, stating that it;s a weekday and most employees have partners who do have jobs, so we should either do it in the evening with dinner or so, or on a weekend. They all looked at me like I'm crazy and if people know it now they have more than enough time to ask for the day off that day.
I don't want FH to have to take a vacation day to have a beer with my co-workers and hear a speech by my boss. I'd rather have him use that vacation day to go on a weekend trip to some other city or so.
Half our management team are people who either have no partner, have a non-working/retired partner or have a partner who works for the city as well and can just put an appointment at our office in her agenda and get paid to come visit us. The only objective there was to have it after regular school hours.
Is it me, or is it insanely stupid and very insensitive to organize it this way and force people to take a vacation day to have a beer with their spouses co-workers?
(Sorry for the length, I'm in p/o-mode!)
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What I'm looking forward to in 2012:
Eating our way through (northern) Italy on vacation
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Re: Is it me or is this stupid?
That's insane. We had one of those (and I work for a big organisation) and I didn't even tell DH. I can't see any way that he'd want to take time off work to come to my work. I'm not very ambitious and it's a big company so it didn't matter at all, so it kind of depends on your situation to how important it is.
I don't socialise with coworkers ever (I'm all about work/home separation) so I'm probably totally biased.
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks, Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks
I'm sure they're looking at it from the European perspective of "its no big deal to take a random holiday because we have a bazillion days off per year anyway" and not the American "make every day off count, don't waste a minute."
But I think if you have a problem with it the solution is just to say "I'm sorry he can't take the day off" and leave it at that. If there are fewer people who would be bothered by the scheduling than there are people than it would be ok for (you mention many wouldn't have an issue with it, right?) then I'd try not to get too bent out of shape.
We're a REALLY small organization, 25 people, which includes all part-timers and management and stuff.
I know that if I don't bring him/don't go myself, it will be frowned upon/considered VERY antisocial. At the same time I know that there are at least 2 other people, but probably a bunch more, who's partners/spouses have full time jobs and will need to take up vacation time for this. I guess I'll talk it over with them, see if we can make sure we're all not the ONLY one who doesn't show.
I just get really peeved off that they go out of their way to accomodate people who have children, but don't take the people without children into consideration at all.
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What I'm looking forward to in 2012:
Eating our way through (northern) Italy on vacation
<a href="http://www.thenest.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Home DI wanted to say something like this but every time I typed it out, I just sounded irritable! I really hate this, they do it all the time at my work too.
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks, Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks
So true.
Since it starts at 3:30 could your FH leave work at 4 or 4:30 and catch the end of the event, and only need to take 1-2 hours of vacation time, rather than a half day?
I guess it's a trade off however you look at it. Personally, I'd rather take a half vacation day than spend one of my weekend family days at a work function or have to pay a babysitter for a no-kids work evening function (but I happen to loathe DH's no-kids work evening functions). And there's no way in heck I would take DD to a work event in the evening when she's likely to be tired and cranky.
ETA: Just re-read this and realized I'm one of those "insensitive to people who don't have kids" folks. I don't mean to be, but the way things have worked out with my job & DH's, both of us have much more flexibility than DD does when it comes to scheduling. For an event like this, DH would likely just pop out for an hour or two and not be charged with taking "vacation time" or he would tell me he couldn't make it at all because work was too crazy for him that day. With DD, there's really no way I would chance an utter meltdown in a professional setting by bringing her to something at 7 or 8 pm. It's possible your event organizers followed the same rationale.
That does suck. I agree to talk it over with other coworkers in your similar situation and try to get you all in the same boat.
Is it possible for your SO to come a bit later? Maybe if he leaves work at 4pm, he could still make it for some social time but not have to take any time off? I guess it depends on how flexible his office is, but it's usually no big deal if I have to leave 1-2 hours early one day, and I don't need to book official time off.
Cecilia arrived 12 October 2012
But if they had, say, a brunch on the weekend you'd still have your family day. Yes, you will be at a work function, but you will be with your family and get to mix and mingle. It's not like you'd actually be working during this time.
It seems a little crazy to me that they wouldn't have a social function on the weekend, but I guess it would just depend on what's culturally acceptable. Where I'm from in Hicktown GA most people don't mind you taking off of work early once in a while, but where my friend grew up that was pretty much unheard of unless it's an emergency situation.
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Thanks for all your replies. The problem is that my FH as well as the partners of 2 of my co-workers work long days. FH is never home before 8, so is co-worker 1's FH and co-worker 2's DH might be done with work around 6ish, but has an hour and a half commute.
If they'd say we start a 3.30 and go on until evening, maybe add dinner, it'd be fine for people to just join later. Kids could come earlier, adults with jobs could come later, we might not all be there at exactly the same time, but well, that's what you get for doing it on a weekday.
FH's employers are very awesome about emergency leaves, important (milestone) things and stuff like that. They won't have him take vacation time for anything like that. I don't want him to jeopardize that relationship for a stupid 'having drinks with co-workers' event.
To me it really is more about the principle by now - why am I worth less consideration because I have no kids??
My food blog
What I'm looking forward to in 2012:
Eating our way through (northern) Italy on vacation
<a href="http://www.thenest.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Home D