Trouble in Paradise
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Who's your "type"? Did you end up with your typical choice?
Who do/did you usually go for in terms of both looks, personality and personal viewpoints/philosophy?
When you were dating, did/do you vary or do you usually go all over the place? Ex: boisterous vs. shy, type A vs. type B, artistic vs. scientific mind
Did you end up marrying/LTR with your usual preference?
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Re: Who's your "type"? Did you end up with your typical choice?
When I was dating I'd mix it up quite a bit but the ones I always ended up having the serious relationships with were pretty similar now that I think about it. They were all more very out going/ little nerdy but still athletic, love the outdoors, good morals and from a good/happy family.
and yes I ended up marrying one just like that too except with the things that the other guys were obviously missing.
I don't really have a "type" I'd go after so much as "types" I preferred to avoid.
Looks-wise, I have a lot of different "types," though for some reason I never found myself attracted to/getting together with anyone either really tall or really fair -- maybe I thought of these types as being more high-maintenance/full of themselves.
I don't think I would have wasted much time dating any "artistic" types either.
Once a guy gets past my filtering criteria, I was pretty open-minded in a "Show me what you got" sort of way.
DH is definitely among my main type preferences -- strong, skinny, and not too hairy.
Looks: I always date guys with big noses
I don't think it's a "thing," but it's a common thread for sure. Also, all were skinny. My H is 6' and 155.
Personality: Before I started dating my H, I dated confident, outgoing guys who were super self assured. My H is much more reserved and less confident than those guys, by a lot.
Personal viewpoints/philosophy: All of the guys I've dated have been liberal atheists (like me). My H is a vegetarian and an animal lover (like me), and we agree on almost all philosophical/political issues. We also agree on things like having kids (we don't want any), how to spend our time (volunteering, etc), and the like.
I guess H isn't completely my dating "type," but it seems like that worked out for the better.
My Lunch Blog
I like guys that look like teddy bears. I like guys with dark hair and dark, puppy dog eyes. I like guys with big forearms, great lashes and who can fix anything that goes wrong.
I married him.
Currently Reading: Don Quixote by Miguel De Cervantes
Looks wise I did. I prefer lighter skinned tall stocky built black men.
Before DH I dated a lot of douches. DH was not my regular type at all. I figured I would give him a chance since the douches I usually dated were not working out at all. I usually dated more outgoing smooth talking wannabe players. DH was a little nerdy, awkward, more responsible, shy, and really nice. The one requirement I have is a good sense of humor. I can't imagine being with someone that I couldn't joke around with.
Ok, here's where I get flamed.
I married my senior prom date, and my junior prom date (and my freshman and sophomore homecoming date).
I've been with my H for just under 12 years now and we've only been married for 3 months.
So, I can't say I had a dating type. Although, the things I find most attractive are lean muscle, good strong arms, dark hair and eyes, and deep voices. I married that. I also tend to be in close friendships with loaners, so I assume I'd want to date one too, and he is definitely that. There are subtle and almost imperceptible signs of his mood that you learn once you're around him enough and he's not very talkative, so I think the rest of the world thinks he's completely checked out 24/7.
I have also always been attracted to a lean build, angular features, physical ability, confidence, and intelligence, but I dated all over the map and married someone who wasn't very bright.
I don't think I really zeroed in on what I wanted and needed in a relationship until I had been divorced for a while and made a few more ridiculous relationship choices. So I didn't have a "type" unless you can call "wildly inappropriate candidates" a type.
Physically, Mr. Bang is the "type" I would have ranked as most attractive in the past - he is built like and somewhat resembles Adam Levine.
He's very personable, confident, and I'm sure he's smarter than me (and I'm cool with that). We agree on the big stuff that is important to both of us and are just a really good fit.
I would definitely have to say that my "type" was tall/lanky. I liked guys that were in great shape but weren't bulky. I am a sucker for pretty eyes too... doesn't really matter the color.
My husband is 6'1" and he was a runner, so he definitely fits my "type".
For the most part yes, I ended up with my "type."
My preference was more for dark-haired guys, muscular, athletic and smart/ambitious.
DH is all of those. I think the only real difference is that he is a bit shorter than my preference (he's 6'0''), and he played soccer vs. football (I liked bigger guys muscularly, and soccer players tend to be less muscular).
As far as personality, he's right there--friendly, funny, outgoing. And we're exactly in line with person viewpoints/philosophy/religion/political leaning.
So yeah, he pretty much hits every checkpoint on the master list I had.
My physical type has usually been medium- to dark-brown hair and hazel eyes. No idea why that's the type I've found myself most attracted to. I also noticed that most of the guys I dated had similar hands...not too big, not small, but nice hands with long fingers. I've pretty much always preferred nerdy guys, too.
DH definitely fits. He's 6'3", brown hair, hazel eyes, nerdy, looks great in glasses, great hands.
My type has proven to be techie quasi-geek men with darker features, liberal, etc. Although my last two serious relationships were with average-build dudes, I prefer a little more meat on the bones.
Like interro, I've dated some guys who were not appropriate, so it's easier for me to guage a non-type for me than to really pinpoint what makes me tick.
She always said "You always get the one you don't want" and she didn't mean that in an unkind way.
Everybody pictures a "type" that they want --- very very rare if you get exactly what you "want."
That's a good point. Similarly, though Mr. Bang is a lot of what I would have said I wanted, there are also things about him that have become my "type" since we've been together, if that makes sense.
100% this. The fact that I've been with H for so long and we've had a good relationship means that something very catastrophicly bad would have to happen for me not to consider him my type. He's what I've learned to expect and want in a SO.
It's entirely possible that I find some features attractive because they remind me of him, and that overly loud and outgoing men annoy me because he's quiet.
All I can think about is Charlotte York when she met nutty Harry.
That definitely was NOT her type.:)
Yes! But he was just what she needed.
I dated quite a few gingers and then ended up marrying one. I don't think of them as my "type" though since personality is what drew me in. Physically, I always went for tall, blondish, and with a runner's physique....and then dated the teddy bear gingers when those guys didn't give me the time of day, LOL.
Personality was always the driving force for me - outgoing, smart, ambitious, funny. I liked the leaders since I tended to be an introvert. Right after XH and I started dating, I took him to a political event and others thought he was a lobbyist. My dad wasn't too happy about that. He saw the red flags. Me? Not so much.
Post-divorce, I've noticeably settled into more of a type. It's what I've always should have dated, but was too caught up with XH's charisma. Dark hair, nerdy/geeky, romantic, lean build, quiet/shy, smart. Basically your solid, boy next door/future father of my children type. I've always dated liberals though, with BF being an exception. He's so turned off by politics that he doesn't know what he is. It's a refreshing change.
I always went for the intellectuals/geeks. Mind you, I also started dating DH when I was 15, so I didn't go after anyone in a serious manner, really. But I was attracted to the "smart kids," and that is definitely who I ended up with.
Overall, I wanted someone similar to me, so I looked for someone who shared a lot of common interests.
High five! DH and I started dating when I was 14 and now almost 12 years later we have our comptuers set up side by side so we can play MMOs together.
The geeky high school sweetheart has staying power.
My DH has the broad shoulders/square jaw/clean cut look/the outgoing social nature/cultured outlook I always loved.
BUT, he's also blond and blue eyed and I had always dated guys with darker hair and darker eyes before him and had never really found myself drawn to anyone with fair colourings.
On a pleasently surprising note, I always secretly loved the idea of the Dirty Hot Rocker type of guy, and although DH does not look the part, he definitely can fulfill my bad boy fantasies!!
This is very true. I could tell you 15 guys that I wanted, and none of them look like the guys I dated and the guy I eventually married.
I ended up with my "type," blonde hair, blue eyes, outgoing...
My type overall is intellectuals, mostly gamers and computer nerds but also lit nerds and poetry nerds, too. So in that vein, yes.
I will say though that if I just saw a photo of dude at random, my girl parts in no way shape or form would tingle for my H. It's all in the personality.
I'm a fan of the fluffy shape. I love a guy in glasses. DH used to have longer hair and a beard but since he started working at this job, he has to be clean shaven and have short-ish hair. But he's got gorgeous thick chestnut hair with hints of red, and beautiful green eyes, that I would love for our children to get. (I've always done better with tall guys, the one time i dated someone under 6 ft, he turned out to be a "grade A" A*hole.)
We have similar but not identical tastes in literature, and we both love video games even though he's much better at them than I am. We tend to balance out each other I think, he's a little more aggressive when he sees something he wants, than I am. I am a little more go with flow.
DH is definitely my type.
She thought he was a pest. She would avoid him at all costs possible; called him ":the jerk" and thought he was too short and ugh.
She wound up marrying him. Definitely not her type at all.:)
2 out of 3 of my serious relationships have been a bit heavier than what I would have thought my type would be. The other one was scrawny :-)
Also, both my current BF and XH really liked chic flicks. I like that!
Overall I wouldn't say I have a type.
pretty much, yeah.
i only read the first questio and none of the follow ups, but if you're bice to me, i might give you more later.
not i think i should go to bed.
night.