Trouble in Paradise
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
I finally found BF's weakness
He's not a good gift-giver. Sigh.
He's so proud of himself that I don't have the heart to ask for a receipt. Just tell me I'm an ungrateful b!tch and to suck it up.
This is my siggy.
Re: I finally found BF's weakness
it sucks to hurt feelings, but you have two options:
1) pretend to like the jewelry and set yourself up for a lifetime of mother earth shiit
2) bruise his ego now but save yourself from a lifetime of mother earth shiit
This.
Yeah you should be honest, otherwise you'll end up with a LOT of this jewelry!
Make sure it has pictures!
I broke my cellphone charger and when I went to buy a new one I went ahead and got a car charger tot. When I told DH, he looked a little concerned. I pressed him and he admitted that he had gotten me a car charger for my cellphone for Christmas.
Really? A charger for my cellphone? For Christmas?
I mean, I guess it is nice to have a useful gift. At least it isn't horrible, offensive, taking up a huge amount a space in my house.
Growing up, my father would leave a Sears catalog on the kitchen table with pages earmarked and things actually circled in red. Now he just e-mails me a link.
I hate that BF won't tell me when he doesn't like a present. Why waste money on something you will never use. I'd rather give him the money and return the item, and then he can buy himself something.
So, I think you should tell him.
Lol I'm the opposite. It's joint money, I want useful things damn it!
I find it SO hard to tell people I don't like a gift.
The first Christmas I spent with DH's family, I was SHOCKED because as BIL and SIL1 opened a present, they would look at the thing, go "eh", and toss it in the "to be returned" pile. For real. Sooooo the opposite of how I was taught to open gifts, lol. Thankfully H and SIL2 don't do that.
I usually suck it up and wear the gift, regift it, or surreptitiously return it without a receipt.
I say tell him, you don't want him to think that you're in love with something. This is the same as people who promote communication in the bedroom. Your SO is never going to learn what you like if you keep faking it.
On a side note, my H's family are all really really good gifters even when they go off list. They know it too. So it's drives me BSC when they give a gift and instead of including the gift receipt quietly or something hand it over with the announcement of "The receipt is in the box in case you don't like it." Dude, I'll notice, you've done that AND TOLD ME for every gift you've given me in the past 12 years. And I have yet to return a one. I'm probably being all pearl clutchy, but it annoys me.
This is what I do.
Except for the wearing part. Or the regifting part.
Ok, fine. I might wear it once, but that is it.
And then he goes shopping with me next year where I say things like, "Ooooh, I REALLY like this one!"
To be clear, I don't do this with H, that's my more general gift-dislike action plan. H is a really good gift-giver. If he gets me something I don't love, I wear/use it for a while immediately afterward and it either grows on me (like the second watch he got me, which I now adore) or I slowly stop wearing it (like the earrings he got me five years ago) and only take it out on rare occasions.
For year, H had been buying me yellow gold jewelery thinking that the only options were silver or yellow gold... and that gold was more precious so the choice was obvious. A few months before we got engaged, I had to suck it up and talk to him about it. I knew we were probably getting kind of close (didn't realize how close) so I finally had to break down and say "H... I hate to say this... but if you ever purchase an engagement ring for me... and this is no pressure... but I would prefer... if you could... to make it white gold as opposed to yellow gold".
I just would've been so heartbroken if I had to receive a yellow gold engagement ring. H felt badly (and still talks about getting all my previous jewelery rhodium plated)... but he's SO happy that I get what I want now.
Currently Reading: Don Quixote by Miguel De Cervantes
I told him - he took it well and handed over the receipt. I think I feel worse about it than he does. Especially because I want to smack him upside the head for spending that much money on hippie-chic jewelry. It's stuff that belongs on a retiree that's into outdoor tai chi. Not to mention I almost never wear jewelry anyways, so he was kinda doomed from the start.
He gave me the puppy-dog eyes and said "I guess I should have bought that purse you liked at the mall." Yes, yes you should have.
Ah well. If this the worst I have to look forward to, then I'll take it.
Sounds like a good outcome!
Good for both of you! You can take the money and go buy that purse and all is right with the world.
I'd find a way to tell him. Praise how beautiful it is (lies!) but just say it isn't really your style.
My old boss's wife used to give me hideous jewelry for Christmas and my birthday. I would always wear it once later that week, and then give it to my mom so she could either wear it, or take it apart and repurpose it with her jewelry making hobby.
Well, at least he got you jewelry, which is a good start right?
I would start showing him the types of jewelry you like from here on out... My DH knows the jewelry styles I like because i point them out randomly throughout the year.