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To file or not to file? (sorry, its long)
Background: So XH and I settled in September and basically, he is supposed to be paying me $263 a month towards our settlement (for three years) plus $100 contribution towards DS's health insurance (which I carry from my employer). We are supposed to split everything else DS related 50/50 by submitting receipts for reimbursement. He's supposed to pay me on the 1st of the month.
In november he was late, then when I submitted a receipt from the $164 dentist bill I paid, he emailed me saying "well Ive been paying for stuff too. I thought it was just going to be a wash and blah blah blah." I told him I had no problem paying 50% but I needed him to send me copies of receipts (he's a super slacker and has probably lost them all already).
Now we're at the end of December, he is almost $300 late and in 1 week, he will be over $600 late (because he will owe me for Jan too).
(Deep Breath) Ok. So here's my question. I emailed him threatening that if he didnt get caught up by the 1st, I was going to contact my attorney and we would be filing a motion for contempt. My attorney is a super slacker and I'd really rather not have to work with him but I cannot afford a new attorney. So, if he doesn't pay by the 1st, should I proceed with filing the motion or not? Should I consider doing this on my own through the courts or should I just babysit my attorney in doing it? Any other ideas or suggestions?
Re: To file or not to file? (sorry, its long)
This. In my state (for child support) the non-custodial parent needs to be 12 weeks in arrears before the courts will even consider filing for contempt.
Splitting things 50/50 sounds great, but I think in reality it works for very few people. What's his incentive to pay once you've footed the bill? I know he's technically violating a CO, but you have to go through a huge amount of trouble to get it back. The amount you pay in attorneys fees will make it not worth it until it's a much bigger amount. And it just gives you so many opportunities to have things to argue back and forth about....I paid this...oh yeah well I paid this....etc.
Honestly, I think you'd be better off with a more traditional child support arrangement where he doesn't have the option to pay you and you're not constantly fighting over who pays what.
I put a clause in the settlement agreement that if either party needs to take it to court in order to enforce the terms of the agreement, that the prevailing party would be awarded reasonable attorney's fees. So at least I will not be out of pocket there. I would just rather avoid it if all possible because I hate the idea of having to babysit my attorney.
As for the "arrangement" we had regarding our son, it was unfortunately the only terms he would agree to in mediation. Otherwise it would have been a huge fight. He also gets paid a lot of cash, under the table, that he does not declare, so he would look like he makes a whole lot less than he actually does, so I didnt want to push the issue if he was willing to reimburse expenses paid. Ugh im just so frustrated.