Sex & Romance
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condom alternatives?

The not-so-short long story short: I'm on a doctor-supervised diet program, which is great. I'm losing weight. Yay. I am also on the pill for birth control, and I never miss a day and I always take it around 9pm. Obviously if I missed any, using back up BC is an automatic must.
However, despite being perfect with my pills, my period got a little wacky last month---it showed up like halfway through my pack of pills, and then when it was supposed to show up, it was shorter and lighter than usual. I'm not really sure what that means, but it's making me paranoid now.

When I spoke to my doctor about it, he did say that losing weight can make women who couldn't get pregnant before get pregnant now (especially women with PCOS, which he said I likely have). That's not surprising and I already knew it.
But when I said "I shouldn't have to worry since I'm on the pill, right?" He gave me a rather iffy look and told me that in his program he's known three women who have been on birth control and still gotten pregnant (!!!). For all intents and purposes, I'm going to assume they were responsible with their pills and it wasn't because they skipped any, but instead because their bodies got out of wack from losing weight and it interfered with the hormones in the pill.

So as a precaution I thought we'd use back up birth control until I reach my goal weight and my body is more regulated with itself again. I really, really do not want to get pregnant. I've been researching other methods of BC besides the male condom, which neither of us like very much.

Does anyone have any reviews on female condoms? I'm a little weirded out by it. What about other forms of BC, like spermicides, sponges, or diaphragms? Any notes or personal experience on how easy they are to use, how easy they are find to buy, and how reliable they are?

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Re: condom alternatives?

  • Hi! I don't usually post on the Nest, more on the Knot, but I have an answer...

     

    The female condom is super safe and super effective. It's easy to use if you're ok using tampons, etc., meaning you to have to insert it. They should be available at drug stores with other condoms but if they aren't you can get them from your doctor, health department, Planned Parenthood... In fact: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control/female-condom-4223.htm

     

    I have a feeling they're a little more expensive than male condoms but that may not be the truth.

     

    Hope this helps!

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I've used a diaphragm for a while.  It takes some getting use to, but it's easy once you do it a few times.  It's a no-brainier to get it in place - it literally just expands and slides in.

    However, there are some unconvienent aspects to it:

    #1 you need to leave it in place 6-8 hours after sex (which all depends on which spermacide you use).  If you have sex at night it's no big deal, but one time we did a quickie and then left for the rest of the day and I had to leave it in much longer than expected.  I don't like to do this because it does put you at risk of TSS.  I really didn't want to have to take it out in some public restroom somewhere.

    #2 you need to dig in there and pull it out, so if you're not comfortable with reaching up your vag for things, this takes some getting use to.

    #3 you can put it in place 20 or so minutes before sex, but that means it has to be planned.  So if something spontaneously happens, you have to say BRB and go throw one in.

    In all, I thought it was a great alternative to condoms, both male and female.  You can't feel it once it is in place.

  • Diaphragms, sponges and spermicides are very easy to use; you can add them to foreplay.

    There is also NFP -- many women use it to avoid getting pregnant.

    There is also vaginal film and the female condom.

  • What? I do not understand what your doctor is saying. Sure, it is easier to get pregnant if you are at healthy weight, but the chances of getting pregnant while on the pill is 1 in 100. You may have been spotting halfway through your pill cycle and confused it with a period. Some pills cause heavier spotting than others. 

    Pick up a copy of Taking Charge of your Fertility to help you understand your body better.  

     

  • 1st of all, congrats on the successful diet :-)

    2ndly, get over your condom aversion - there are a whole bunch to try and they are the most inexpensive and easiest OTC birth control.  Charting, etc takes a while to get the hang of.  Sponges, foam, etc are messy.  I'm surprised you are willing to consider a female condom (which is kind of like a plastic sandwich bag) and a diaphram, but don't like male wiener socks.  Or try an IUD - Mirena or Paraguard.

    GL! 

    Natural m/c Oct. 2005
    Dx: balanced translocation and LPD
    TTC since Oct 2011
    BPF 02/19/12 ----> EDD 10/31/12 ----> natural m/c 02/28/12 (4w6d)
    And we're on to IVF, BCPs starting 10/17, stims 11/7: Lupron, Gonal F ---> too high estrogen, coasted for a few days then added 2 doses of Ganirelix; lots of measurable follies; 9R, 5M, 4F, 1 passed PGD, 1 3B blast transferred 11/23; PIO til ET, then PIO and Endometrin BID; +HPT 12/2 (9dp5dt), Beta #1 12/3 297, Beta #2 12/5 739/progesterone 69, Beta #3 12/12 ___

    All welcome
  • imageCNYBride05:

    1st of all, congrats on the successful diet :-)

    2ndly, get over your condom aversion - there are a whole bunch to try and they are the most inexpensive and easiest OTC birth control.  Charting, etc takes a while to get the hang of.  Sponges, foam, etc are messy.  I'm surprised you are willing to consider a female condom (which is kind of like a plastic sandwich bag) and a diaphram, but don't like male wiener socks.  Or try an IUD - Mirena or Paraguard.

    GL! 

    lol It's not so much as a condom aversion, but it's rather uncomfortable for me. He doesn't like it of course because it doesn't feel as good, but it still works for him. But for me, no matter how much lube we try it kind of just hurts me...it feels like something (the rubber) is pulling on me, and shaving didn't help either since I thought it might've been a hair problem. It makes it uncomfortable and distracting enough that sex doesn't usually go anywhere for me. We've tried a few different kind of condoms from a variety pack (not sure it matters if it's just a material problem?) and will probably keep trying them out unless I take the plunge into another option.

    But that was why I was looking for alternatives and the real point of this post was just to ask if any women had used these other methods and their opinions of them. I agree the female condom looks really creepy and it was totally at the bottom of my list! I would like an IUD but the horror stories scare me and I've heard women who haven't had a baby before usually have more problems?

    Thanks though!

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  • I <3 the film.... I have the same issues with condoms being really uncomfortable, and most other spermicides are messy. The film is a little odd to put in at first, and we generally avoid oral once it's in, but it's definitely my favorite. And by favorite I mean only b/c I can stand apart from the IUD... Okay, back to lurkdom :)
    ~Julie image Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers
  • Couple of things.

    When you lose weight it can mess with your hormones because fat stores chemicals and as you burn the fat they are released back into your body.

    I can not use hormonal bc  for medical reasons. We used condoms for a year and we decided to try NFP, So far so good. We use condoms during the most fertile days still. You may be allergic to latex or the spermicide. We use bareskin trojans and a lot of KY if necessary.

    GL and congrats on the weight loss!

     

     

  • imageDorothyofOz:
    imageCNYBride05:

    1st of all, congrats on the successful diet :-)

    2ndly, get over your condom aversion - there are a whole bunch to try and they are the most inexpensive and easiest OTC birth control.  Charting, etc takes a while to get the hang of.  Sponges, foam, etc are messy.  I'm surprised you are willing to consider a female condom (which is kind of like a plastic sandwich bag) and a diaphram, but don't like male wiener socks.  Or try an IUD - Mirena or Paraguard.

    GL! 

    lol It's not so much as a condom aversion, but it's rather uncomfortable for me. He doesn't like it of course because it doesn't feel as good, but it still works for him. But for me, no matter how much lube we try it kind of just hurts me...it feels like something (the rubber) is pulling on me, and shaving didn't help either since I thought it might've been a hair problem. It makes it uncomfortable and distracting enough that sex doesn't usually go anywhere for me. We've tried a few different kind of condoms from a variety pack (not sure it matters if it's just a material problem?) and will probably keep trying them out unless I take the plunge into another option.

    But that was why I was looking for alternatives and the real point of this post was just to ask if any women had used these other methods and their opinions of them. I agree the female condom looks really creepy and it was totally at the bottom of my list! I would like an IUD but the horror stories scare me and I've heard women who haven't had a baby before usually have more problems?

    Thanks though!

    It could be a latex allergy or an allergy to the lube used on lubricated condoms. Trojan, Lifestyles, and Durex all make a polyurithane (sp) condom. You can also try unlubricated condoms and add your own lube to see if it's any better.

    Me: 25
    Dx PCOS (June 2006, re-confirmed March 2012), Anemia (May 2010-Still fighting to correct it), Fibromyalgia (May 2011)
    Initial b/w - normal
    HSG (March 2012) revealed right tube open and looking great. Left tube deformed with hydrosalpinx.
    Lap (April 2012) Removal of left fallopian tube. Right tube open and viable, but "rather enlarged." NO evidence of endometriosis...Uterus looks beautiful and "very capable" of carrying a pregnancy!
    October 2012 - Clomid 50mg + trigger + IUI = BFN
    With all factors taken into account, RE is recommending IVF. Planning on moving forward with treatment as a single woman using DS by Summer 2013.
    After 17 months of trying, Surprise BFP #1 2.15.2008 | EDD 8.7.2008 | Lost 2.16.2008
    After 2 more years of trying, Surprise BFP #2 1.29.2012 | EDD 9.11.2012 | Lost 1.29.2012
    Surprise BFP #3 3.27.2012 | EDD 12/2/2012 | Lost 4.1.2012
    imageimage
    someecards.com - Get a colonic?!? Some older lady said that's what she did to cure her infertility...Who knew a fancy enema and a sparkling clean ass would cure my infertility.
    My Blog Pinterest
  • I've never been pregnant but have an IUD and I love it. It was a little uncomfortable the first 6 months but overall it has been a pleasant experience. My husband and I never use condoms and so far do good. Hormones don't work well for me; estrogen especially. My insurance wouldn't pay for brand name progesterone only birth control that I was on and generic caused awful side effects, so they had to pay way more for an IUD even though it is usually excluded since I can't use any other birthcontrol  except condoms. 
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