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College Matters
My H starts Spring semester this week. on his 7th year trying to wrap up his undergrad in engineering. The past year or more have been a real struggle as he's lost interest in school, Withdrawn from most/all of his classes when his midterm grades weren't passing, even a couple of flunked classes.
He's super clever and book smart. the problem is entirely motivation. The worse he does, the more he hates school, so he does even worse... vicious little cycle.
We've talked about school several times and he wants the satisfaction of finishing and getting into his career field - he's really interested in the engineering work his now-graduated year mates are doing. He just doesn't see any light at the end of the tunnel for him.
How can I be motivating, and keep him on track, without acting like his mother??
(there's also a general lack of understand on my end. I love school, am always excited about shcool, am taking night classes to work on a master's degree while I already have a full-time job in my career field, just because I want to... Just a different perspective on the problem that makes it really hard to understand my H on this topic).
Re: College Matters
You can't make anyone be motivated.
What is he doing while in school? Is he working at all?
Could this be a sign that maybe this really isn't the profession he should be in?
I did my undergrad in engineering as well, to be honest, I didn't particularly enjoy school at the time but I figured it was because I just didn't like school, but that once I got out I'd like my profession. Because of that I really didn't do that well, just enough to get by and graduate. This was not the case, I hated it, and now Im switching careers entirely, am starting a new profession, and I LOVE the classes Im taking and do well in them because of that.
Im not saying this is the case for him, but has he considered it?
i bet humiliation would be a good motivator. get him a cape made that says SUPER SENIOR. give him nicknames based on notable perpetual students in movies and television (Dauber from Coach, Bluto from Animal House, for example), make him a nice string to attach his mittens in the sleeves of his coat so he doesn't lose them...
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
Don't most engineering fields require more than just an undergrad to be able to find a decent job?
Some do, some don't. It's pretty unecessary in my field unless you want to teach. For biomedical eng, it's all but required.
What decent jobs DO require though, is good grades if you're right out of college. Taking 7 years to finish and failing classes is not a good sign for the job search.
we all fall down sometimes
brass and ballet flats