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How long did you keep your PG a secret?
Because I may or may not be keeping that secret. I am way superstitious and lame for thinking that I will jinx myself if I tell people then something bad will happen. We told our immediate families right away last time because they would have known the first time I turned down a fun drink after the beach. And I was sick right away. I know telling them had nothing to do with it, but less than a week later I had a m/c. Now I am super paranoid. I would want their support either way, but I dread the thought of un-telling them again - especially my family. My grandfather died on Christmas day and it has been really hard. So I know it will cheer up my parents, but I don't want to upset them further if something goes wrong again. (I am 7w4d - so still very early). I haven't been feeling great and I know they are picking up on it (since we've had a lot of family gatherings in the last few weeks between the holidays and funeral prep), so the surprise factor is kinda out the window, I guess. We had an ultrasound yesterday - saw the little flicker on the screen so that eased my mind a little. I just wish I had a little of the naivete' back so I wouldn't constantly be worrying and be able to enjoy this a little bit more.
Andplusalso, today is my birthday and was the first day that I woke up with a real case of m/s. I spent a good 10 minutes gagging in the bathroom before work. But one of my students just said to me, "however old you are, you look great for your age". He, of course, is my visually impaired student. So there's that, ha.
Any words of wisdom?
ETA: I'm obviously out to no one yet, so please keep this off FB to the few FB friends I have on here 
Re: How long did you keep your PG a secret?
Congrats!
I told a few very close friends right away b/c I was an idiot and couldn't read the test. Also told my sis b/c she's an ob/gyn.
All family knew by 9 weeks. Told work at 13 weeks.
We were very lucky to not have any problems and I think it was probably risky to tell people that early. I think a past mc would make me wait, though, personally b/c I would hate to un-tell people.
I hope things go great for you - they say ms is a good sign! Good luck with whatever you decide.
Congrats!
If I were PG, I think I personally would wait until the end of the 1st trimester regardless. That has always been what I believed. If I could keep it from DH that long, I would too lol. He can't keep a secret and all of FB will probably know 10 seconds later.
First, congrats AND happy birthday!
I was in a similar situation because I miscarried at 9 weeks and had already told everyone. Having to tell everyone you're no longer pregnant is horrible but when we got pregnant the second time around, I told my family at around 7 weeks because I knew I would need their support if something went wrong again. Luckily, all was fine and I think we started telling the rest of the world around 11 weeks after I saw the heartbeat a few times.
I don't think there is a right answer here. I think you just have to do what you are comfortable with. I didn't want to hide my pregnancy the second time around because I was so happy and I felt that baby deserved my joy as much as the first one when people were starting to guess.
Happy birthday, and congratulations!
I had to tell my best friend right after I found out, b/c we had planned a wine tasting thing and I had to cancel.
We told parents after the first ultrasound.
Everyone else found out in the 2nd tri.
First - Happy Birthday!!
Second - Congratulations!! I'm so happy for you and I hope you have a happy and healthy 9 months.
Third - I was a hermit, plain and simple. When I found out, I was literally 3 or 4 weeks pregnant. We waited a week and told parents and siblings and best friends. Told extended family after we heard the heartbeat. Told the world (including work) after the first ultrasound at 12 weeks. I also got pregnant around this time last year so the holidays had died down and there weren't many family gatherings. I just declined all invitations.
My hubs on the other hand, couldn't keep his trap shut and told a bunch of his cousins at the Philly Beer Festival a full month before my u/s and didn't even remember telling them. When we called to tell them, they were all "umm that's old news".
Happy Birthday and congrats!
With DS I waited to see and hear the heartbeat, so family knew around 9 weeks and the rest of the world found out at 3 and 4 months. I've also had a mc and even though it makes the announcement that much more scary, I personally will still stick by my see/hear heartbeat rule for family for future pregnancies. I would say don't tell them to distract them from your grandfather's passing esp if it will make you more superstitious/anxious (sorry about that by the way. I lost my grandfather at Thanksgiving so I understand how everyone must feel). But if it feels right, go for it. Best of luck!
congrats! happy birthday!
we waited until the NT scan. i had an u/s at 8 weeks and we saw a heartbeat but dh was working in a different state and wasn't there. we wanted to wait until we got out of the first tri. it ended up that my mommom was diagnosed as terminal the day before my NT scan. i told my mommom the night that we found out she was terminal. i wanted her to know immediately while she was still kind of with it. we were going to tell all of our parents and siblings at my bday dinner that weekend but my mommom died and we ended up just telling them sort of ad hoc that weekend.
whether you tell them now or wait, it will still be a great feeling for them and make them really happy. babies seem to know good times to arrive.
Happy birthday and Congrats!!!!
I hope everything goes well for you.
Congratulations and also Happy birthday!
We told a few close friends and my Mother right away, told other family after we saw the heartbeat for the first time 8 - 9 weeks), and then other important people as we saw them in person.
We put it on Facebook and told everyone else after we got the results from the first part of the NT scan.
I know it's scary - I was afraid to 'come out' fully in case something went wrong too, but we were ok telling close friends and family early as they are the people we would want to know if something had gone wrong anyway.
Congrats and Happy birthday! Who knew morning sickness would be a nice bday present?
We told our immediate families after we saw/heard the h/b- about 8 weeks. For my 2nd pg our families pretty much already knew I was pg since I had not been drinking. Eventhough the surprise factor wasn't completely there everyone was still excited and happy for us. So, don't worry so much about the surprise for everyone else. They'll still be excited and will have their suspicions confirmed.
As far as friends go, we waited until I was about 12 wks along before telling them. And in FB world- I went public around 20 wks- after our big u/s- but most ppl knew by then. I liked to wait as long as possible- I'm the superstitious type too.
Good luck! Enjoy this time and try not to worry yourself too much.
TJW arrived 7/28/11
Congrats and good luck! Happy Birthday! and I'm sorry for your loss.
I really think it's personal preference. With T3, my girlfriends knew right away because we had a concert the next night and they would know by me not drinking. With T2 and T3 we told T1 and our parents around 8-9 weeks after the first doc appt, after we told them word got spread very quickly but we didn't mind. I have a very close family and if there were any hardships, I would rather them to know so they can support us. I told work around 11-12 weeks and mainly because I popped pretty quick being they weren't my first pregnancies
Jonathan Dean 4.5.08
Anna Capri 5.4.11
Thanks, ladies, for the great responses and birthday wishes. Sorry for the post and run - I had to run to class, and you know, teach.
DH is of the mindset that the people we will tell in the near future (our immediate families) probably already assume since I haven't been drinking and they know about my loss and that we had been TTC for a while now. I did try to fake-drink on NYE and DH ended up getting wasted because he was secretly gulping my wine in addition his beverages. I think I want to tell my best girlfriends this week at girls' night because they were so supportive with my loss - even though they had no idea I was PG in the first place. Plus, one of my BFFs is also PG and we are due about 2 weeks apart - she is the only one who knows and that's because she had a loss too - so we've leaned on each other the past few months.
I think my biggest hurdle will be keeping this from my co-workers - we are a very social group - I just can't keep blowing them off! My saving grace right now is that just had 2 re-excisions for pre-melanoma done yesterday and I tore cartilage on my ribcage from coughing. So not drinking while "on pain meds" is working for me now...but what about 2 weeks from now? I really would like to hold out until the end of Feb if I can.
I will definitely be okay with extended family until the 2nd tri. We don't have too many big family things coming up so I should be good for a few weeks.
Congratulations and happy birthday!
With DS, I told a few close friends and my sister right away. I told my parents around 8 weeks and let it all out around 12 weeks
With DD, I told a few close friends and my sister, and meant to wait until 12 weeks to tell my family and everyone else. At a family party my SIL asked when we were going to have another and she figured it out from the look on my face. My dad happened to be standing next to her and overheard. So then the cat was out of the bag. But for everyone else it was 12 weeks
It's not so much that I wouldn't tell people if I had a mc, it's that you pretty much have to tell everyone right away. If they didn't know I was pg to begin with, I could let people know as I felt comfortable talking about it
GL!!
DS 3.12.08
DD 7.11.09
DD 8.01.13
Congrats Tracy!!!
Personally at 10 weeks we have not told anyone besides immediate family and a few very close friends .. (besides my nest post yesterday, obviously). We told my mom at 5 weeks because I was having some issues, and she's a nurse and I wanted her support. We told his parents at 6 weeks. And we are currently in the process of telling the rest of our families and a couple close friends.
I am considered more high risk because I have PCOS, so I was seeing an RE for weekly monitoring during the first tri. That definitely made me more comfortable because I could see things progressing. I am assuming you've also gone for beta #'s and an early u/s due to the previous miscarriage? If so, hopefully those things will help to put your mind at ease a little bit.
We plan on telling other people and openly talking about it probably closer to when we find out the sex. Maybe a little sooner. But I'm also big on not sharing too much personal info with the world, so I don't feel the need to shout it from the rooftops.
Yes - I had 2 beta draws last week and then an ultrasound yesterday. The betas were great according to my OB and the ultrasound tech gave me very little info other than the heartbeat was within normal range. I see my doctor next week but I don't think they even try the doppler at 9 weeks. So I'm not sure when I will see or hear it again, other than the 20 week scan. We haven't decided if we are doing the NT scan yet.
Congrats and happy birthday!
I told a bunch of internet friends I'd never met the night I POAS at 5 weeks - fellow women cycle instructors..
Told a few other friends shortly after.
Told parents at 8 weeks after u/s and hearing hb. I actually didn't want to tell family that early but DH's grandmother was very ill and he thought the family needed good news.
I told my spin classes at 15 weeks (most of them were starting to suspect) and work around the same.
Honestly I probably would've waited longer for work except it was getting harder to hide.
we told immediate family right away. (actually, dh was in disbelief that i was pregnant so i went to my OB and confirmed it by ultrasound first, ha)
I ended up telling my boss and staff fairly early because I had a lot of bleeding in the first tri and was upset/needed to run to the doctor.
Everyone else (ha), after the NT scan
congrats on your pregnancy if I haven't said so already.
I waited until about 2 1/2 months to tell most people.
really its up to you.
sorry to hear about your ms. i had to constantly snack and sip on seltzer for the first 2 months to feel ok.