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HORRIBLY rough day as a mom. Lord give me strength.

SO DD didn't want to go to cheer practice tonight. The coaches have been super hard on the team since we are in nationals season and really pushing them but it isn't like her to back down from a challenge. I figured that she was just frustrated. So after some major drama she is getting ready for practice. I go in her room to help her get everything together and she bursts into tears.

She is a mess saying it is about BFF and can barely get a word out. So I am scared and ask if BFF is ok. I finally got it out of her that her BFF tried to commit suicide last night. Thank GOD BFF's mom caught her after swallowing a huge amount of pills and rushed her to get her stomach pumped. DD saw her mom at school getting BFFs things and found out. DD is having a very hard time with it understandably. So now the breakdown over cheer makes sense.

This comes after finding out a few weeks ago that her favorite cousin who she is really close with has been being sexually abused by her dad for the last few years. I am close with my niece and even I can't see how we missed something was going on, (DD's grammy finally got my niece to talk). I don't know how much emotional stuff a 12 year old can deal with but she is definitely at her limit. We are spending the whole day tomorrow as a girls day so she has some time off from all the nightmares. I feel so bad for my poor baby, and her BFF and her cousin. My heart breaks for all of them. I have tried to be as supportive as I can be but MAN, where in the world do you even start?

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Re: HORRIBLY rough day as a mom. Lord give me strength.

  • That is all so sad.  poor kids. 
    Mom to Alex - 8.29.06, Foster - 1.22.09, Emily - 6.24.11 imageimageLilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Good gracious, that is a lot to deal with for an adult, much less a 12-year old. T&P for all of you!!

     

  • imageTexasHarmony:
    Good gracious, that is a lot to deal with for an adult, much less a 12-year old. T&P for all of you!!

    This exactly. Poor thing Sad

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  • Maybe some counseling would help her? 

  • Support and time with her mom is exactly what she needs. i am so sorry she is going through this. at 14 a good friend committed suicide and a year later i learned an uncle molested a very close family member.  i also lost my godmother to cancer the same month my friend killed hkmself. it was a lot to take, and my mom and i didnt have the relationship you guys have, or i am sure it would have been easier.  there is a book called why suicide that the school counselors gave us. a huge part of what i was dealing with was why he didnt reach out to me, and i thought i should have done something to protect him.  i also felt like i held some responsibility for the family member getting molested because i always felt creeped out by that uncle and never wanted to be left alone with him. i wish i had counseling to reach out to then. i carried a lot of guilt over that for years. it might not be a bad idea for your daughter. and if not that, i wanted to share so you could watch for signs of that survivor guilt in her so you can help her through it. i will remember her in my prayers tonight, and you too.
    "If you can't say something nice, shut the hell up!"
    - Paula Deen to 104.1 KRBE's Producer Eric 9/17/2011
  • Oh wow... That poor baby (and poor you!).  Prayers headed your way.
  • I thinks he does feel some guilt about her friend and she did say she always felt weird about her uncle and luckily, she was never alone with him or even around him much.  We spent the day together on Saturday and even yesterday and she seems to be handling it all in stride.  She knows all she can do there is be there for her cousin and friend.  So we have the lines of communication open. 
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  • imageTexasHarmony:
    Good gracious, that is a lot to deal with for an adult, much less a 12-year old. T&P for all of you!!

    Ditto, many prayers for everyone involved.

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  • Oh my goodness, that is a lot for her to deal with. The good thing is she told you, she came to you when she was overwhelmed and you can be there for her. I hope things get better for everyone.
    aka- DavidsBride2Be
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  • Again, more prayers for all of you. Sounds like you've got a great kid on your hands.
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  • Update: It has been a rough week for her.  Her friend is at school and has someone with her at all times.  They have her in counseling so at least they did that.  Come to find out that the parents screamed and yelled at her after this and told her what a selfish horrible kid she was.  NOT what she should be hearing.  I am still really worried cause I know she is ok at school but not at home.  So DD has been trying to talk to her and just be there for her.  I know she is extremely worried and stressed out over this.  Last night she had a good 45 min. sob fest in my arms.  And topping all that off, one of her other friends was just plain HORRIBLE to her yesterday.  Another girl who had been her good friend till they had a falling out was really mean to her too.  I think I am as much a wreck as my kid. 
    image
    You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted and used against you. My Blog
  • holy cow, I hope things get better for her soon, that's alot for her to deal with.  t&p for everyone!
  • imageMrs.JulesH-S:
    Update: It has been a rough week for her.  Her friend is at school and has someone with her at all times.  They have her in counseling so at least they did that.  Come to find out that the parents screamed and yelled at her after this and told her what a selfish horrible kid she was.  NOT what she should be hearing.  I am still really worried cause I know she is ok at school but not at home.  So DD has been trying to talk to her and just be there for her.  I know she is extremely worried and stressed out over this.  Last night she had a good 45 min. sob fest in my arms.  And topping all that off, one of her other friends was just plain HORRIBLE to her yesterday.  Another girl who had been her good friend till they had a falling out was really mean to her too.  I think I am as much a wreck as my kid. 

    My heart breaks for her friend.  Many continued prayers for strength for both girls.  And some understanding for those parents.

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