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Another whining post
I realize Molly's birthday is 3 1/2 months away, but I'm already dreading it (and not for the normal mommy reasons). In DHs family, when people have a birthday in the same month, they have a joint party (like niece and nephew are November, etc). I don't know why it didn't occur to me that I would probably be in charge of nieces birthday in addition to Molly. She is 1 week younger, so it will be a 1st birthday for both of them.
DH and I had talked in general about it, thinking we could get Moe's burritos catered and just a small gathering of family and friends. Oh no, we need to now invite the whole family and skip friends because they don't know niece and wouldn't feel right not buying for her. His family is 34 freaking people. 34. Thirty four! In my little house. Not including my family of... 6. Maybe 7. I still want my bfs family and his bfs would want to come, so that brings us to just under 50. There goes our small gathering.
SILs house is smaller than ours, so I sent her a message asking what she wanted to do. I know they are perpetually broke. Broke as in I offered free passes for an event downtown and she looked at me expectantly and said they couldn't afford gas (yeah, not paying for that). Everyone in the family refers to her as "poor SIL" and I'm not sure if they pity her or if it's a descriptive term. She had a great job and quit when she got married because it's the mans job to work. Well, he makes less than she did, and they moved from her house in Wyoming (suburb, not state) to Hamilton (Cincy girls, you know what I'm talking about). I thought maybe DH and I would rent a room or something, just trying to figure out if I need to secure a reservation. Her response? "Oh, I haven't even thought about that. I normally don't do anything until the day before, LOL." That's it. No answer, no nothing. Of course you don't, you don't have to plan anything.
So this is where I'm at. I'm going to throw a party for my kid. Do all the work, set up, stress, prep, figure out where the hell to put everyone, pay for everything and SIL is going to contribute a kid to get presents. DH expects it, and I'm just about over it. She doesn't do birthday parties for her other kids (twins are 22, stepson is 16, boy is 4). Yet I can't do anything for Molly without including her, and the fact that she doesn't even give a hoot really ticks me off. Like, it has to be done, but you do it and we may show up. I'm not even wanting anything elaborate! Feed them food and cake, open presents, send them home. Why is this so freaking stupid hard? I know I'm letting my feelings toward SIL get in the way, because she just bugs me.
DH seems to think it will be no problem to get 50 people in my house. I think I may kill him. Or go covert and just rent a room with a non-refundable deposit. Or go nucking futs. Grr. If you made it through this, have a cookie. Or a drink. I could use one.
Re: Another whining post
Do we have the same SIL?
I'm sorry you're dealing with this...I have no suggestions but good luck with what you decide. you're a strong woman!!