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Family Vent (long)
Tonight, my siblings and I hosted a 30th anniversary party for my parents at The Melting Pot, the fondue restaurant. It was beautiful, but something that happened keeps bugging me.
My mom has a huge family (28 members showed up to this party alone.) My dad... sadly not. Both of his parents and his brother are dead. All he has left is his older sister and her DH who is a complete jerk. When they agreed to come, I was elated for my poor dad because he hasn't seen her in 2 years and really has no one else.
So they show up (empty handed I might add, not even a card for my folks.) My douche uncle sits there while the cheese fondue is served and glares across the table at everyone as we indulge and talk about how great it is. He eats nothing. Apparently he isn't a "cheese" person. (News to me, and outside of vegans, I didn't know that those people existed. Even so, there was other food on the table which he chose not to eat.) He made everyone feel VERY awkward. Finally, they bring the salads.
He then tells me as he eats his salad that he won't eat the chocolate dessert either. Ok, so I order him a diabetic plate to accomodate him (assorted fresh fruit.) I'm about to play the slideshow I made when I notice out of the corner of my eye, they have their coats on and are leaving, one hour after their arrival and prior to dessert. My sister says to my aunt, "Hey I know you live far away but the slideshow is about 10 minutes, can you stay for that and then leave? We're about to play it right now."
"No, we need to leave NOW," says my aunt. They say bye to my dad and leave. My poor father looked crushed. He is not the type to show any emotion, but I could tell he was so hurt that they couldn't even give him one more hour to finish the party. I don't know if it was the food or what, but I am so completely floored that they couldn't give my parents 2 hours of time over the course of 2 YEARS. They are retired, by the way, and have no obligations forcing them to leave at a specific time.
Everyone else was bowled over by the food and couldn't stop complimenting our choices, so I have a truly hard time believing that was it. We also hosted a bar, so they could have had free drinks but didn't. And, it was noted on the invitation and the facebook event that it was a CHEESE AND CHOCOLATE FONDUE PARTY. It's not as though he showed up and was shocked by the offerings.
I just feel so bad for my father. He doesn't deserve to be treated that way by his only relative. This type of behavior is typical of them so I shouldn't be shocked (for instance, when their dad was dying, she left EVERYTHING in my father's lap and just took her half of the money when it was said and done.) I just wanted to scream at them for throwing a wet rag on such a special night.
She just posted something to my facebook about wishing she saw the slideshow... Uhhh why didn't you wait ten little minutes then? On the bright side of things, once their negative aura was gone, it was a much better night. I just hope my dad doesn't associate his party with the memory of his sister doing that to him. 
Re: Family Vent (long)
From what you described, everyone had a wonderful time except these two. Who in their right mind doesn't like cheese and chocolate fondue? You made a great night, and I'm sure your parents had a blast.
There are just some people in the world who choose to be miserable. It wouldn't matter if you gave them a million bucks, they'd probably complain about the taxes. I'm sorry your dad doesn't have the family support he deserves, but I think he's done all right creating his own family. Obviously, his daughters think the world of him, and what more can a man ask for? Please, don't let these idiots ruin a wonderful night.
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Sounds like an amazing party.
Some people just have their thing--maybe they are jealous that no one would throw them a party like the one you threw. Maybe they are jealous of the closeness of the rest of your family and couldn't hide their feelings so drew negative attention to themselves.
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Sounds like my aunt. She came to Molly's birthday party and asked my husband to fix her a plate. While her husband, son, and granddaughter all sat right beside her. She is perfectly capable and zumbas 4 times a week. She just wanted him to wait on her. My husband said, "I already cooked for you I'm not fixing you a plate" I was proud of him.
Don't let the haters put a damper on your obviously fab party.
Ugh, that's such a bummer. It's a shame that people can't just live and enjoy such a special time. Sorry they had such crumby attitudes.
The good thing is that the party relaxed and it sounds like people had an even better time once they were gone. I doubt your dad will associate his sister and BIL to the amazing party you guys threw.
Kim, the party that you and your siblings threw for your parents anniversary sounds amazing! I am certain that your father will only associate positive things with the party, especially that he has wonderful kids that love him.
Unfortunately, we have a few family members that act the same way at each family gathering. There is just no pleasing them. I am sorry that they acted so rudely, and really hurt your dad. Try not to let it bother you though, there is just no changing some people.
1. The party you threw sounds amazing.
2. Your parents are proably so proud, amazed and thankful for you.
3. Your aunt sounds like she can't be happy, so try not to worry about her, everyone else had a great time.
That sucks! It sounds like you and the sibs did an amazing thing for your parents. I agree with others....don't let your Aunt ruin it. I saw my Dad go through the same thing for years with his only brother. Well, long story short, they no longer speak at all.
I agree with PP. Your Dad has HIS family (your Mom and their kids).
Wow, I'll never people that act like this towards their family
I'm sorry that happened but I'm sure your dad concentrated more on the awesome party and his thoughtful kids
Kim, I'm so glad you're party went well and your parents were happy. It was seriously such a kind thing to do!!
As for your aunt, I"m very sorry that there had to be a debbie downer in the room. At least she didn't stay long, right?
I do feel the need to caution, though: is it possible there are any food allergies/health problems involved? Its just the "We have to leave NOW" reminded me of what I've said before when my husband realizes he's eaten something that has disagreed with him. He is very sensitive to certain foods and sometimes he doesn't even realize he's eaten them until he's running to the bathroom. Maybe her husband's stomach was upset but they were still trying to make it through the party? Seriously, I've been there. I know its not likely, but its better to think of that way then to think your dad's sister would be such a bummer.
Thanks for the kind words, everyone.
I talked to my dad last night and we discussed his sister's abrupt exit and how it made him feel. Although he was bothered by it, he basically told me he felt it was par for the course with her and her DH... no surprises there, and that although he is sad about his lack of relationship with his sister, he had an easier time focusing on his children and the family he created once those two were gone... so I guess it worked out better in the end that they left.
D-- funny you should call her a Debbie Downer since her name is indeed Debbie! Tee hee
Her husband's only allergy is acting normal towards people. He's mean and enjoys making people feel awkward, and has been that way since I was 3. His greatest satisfaction in life comes from believing he ruined someone's day or event, or made them feel inferior to him. You should see the way he talks to his poor mentally disabled daughter. 
Oh well, he's basically done in my book so I don't have to worry about him anymore!
I'm so glad I could vent this to you girls, it means a lot to get this kind of support and to remember that I really did work hard on this party. Thank you, thank you.