s/o of picking out names

jgreg29 · January 2012

For those who have chosen boys names, how many husbands wanted a Jr? If you didn't go with Jr, how did you dissuade your husband? MH has mentioned, a couple of times, that he would like to do that if we ever have a son. I'm less than thrilled with the idea for a couple of reasons. I'm not sure how I would go about dissuading him or nicely wielding a veto (if we allow vetos in our name-changing process). I'm hoping MH isn't all that serious about it but can't tell!

rbagsgirl · January 2012

My DH is a 3rd his dad is a JR and his Grandfather is a Sr...I asked him if he wanted to keep the tradition going and have DS be the 4th but he said no. His reason was that he hated his FULL name growing up and having to sign everything with his full name was a pain in the butt. So for me it was an easy no, had he wanted to keep it going I totally would have let him since its a family "tradition"

mesa81 · January 2012

Well, it's Jewish taboo... so it was a non-negotiable! That doesn't help you though.

lauram730 · January 2012

MH is against the Junior thing, so it's a non-issue for us, thankfully - I'm not a fan, either. Both of our brothers have our fathers' first name as their middle name (I am sure the grammar of that sentence is seriously off...), which I like, but again, DH is against. I'd suggest using his name as a middle name, so you're honoring him, but giving your son his own identity.

MrsHahn11062010 · January 2012

DH didn't want a junior, we even were considering Cole and he didn't want to because it can be a nickname for Nicholas. Our first son will share the same middle name as him though, it was his grandfathers name and means a lot to DH.

tanyamc81 · January 2012

I really did not want to name my son after MH but it was something that he wanted soooo I had rules set before I was 100% on board Embarrassed awful, I know!

I did not agree to Jr. because I did not want everyone calling my son Jr!! I'm not one for nicknames.....but that's just me!
I did the II
MH has always been called Josh.....not one person ever called him Joshua well until our son was born then the IL's thought they were going to call him Joshua and our son Josh....ummmm, no! Not going to happen! They were just doing it to start conflict because that's how mature they are! Anyway, it was well known that MH would be called Josh and our son would be called Joshua....so there was no confusion! (My brother is named after my dad but it's Gary so when someone would call asking for one of them we would have to ask "which one".....it was kind of a pain!)
Now that my son is old enough......he loves being named after his dad! He's very proud to say his name is Joshua Barrett II ......which I do think is cute!

BUT it really comes down to what is going to make both of you happy! Some men care and others don't! Talking out the pros/cons is the best way to make the right choice for your LO!!

maeghan21 · January 2012

and this is why I was thankful that DD came out a girl

DH really really really wants his boy to be a 3rd. When we try to compromise he says that he just wants the initials since even though he is only a Jr, the intials go way way back in his family and there has always been someone with those initials. But, then i agree to that and he changes it

I'm all for naming after family, but his dad goes by his first name, DH goes by his middle name. Even though DH doesn't go by his dad's name (if this makes sense) that is the one that is most important. My problem with this? It's Willis. As in, whatcho talkin bout Willis.

danieleandwayne · January 2012

Heck no! MH isn't even that impressed with his name and he wasn't named after anyone, so there was no tie for him to feel the need to name any of our future children after him.

I told him before we were married that I really wanted to name a future daughter after my grandmother who died just after he and I started dating. He was fine with that. For boys, I had already thought of a first name (I have two actually, which is good because a Nestie beat me to the punch! LOL), but suggested that he choose a middle name. He's tentatively selected his grandfather's name Veikko. Which is a cool name, even if the man himself was a raging alcoholic who is somewhat responsible for raising my infamous MIL.

The only name issue I would have fought were the Jr thing and naming a boy after MH's dad, who was a big douche-canoe (good thing he and I never met).

Personally, I think couple should really agree on their kids' names-- it's kind of a big deal, really. But like any good "deal" being brokered, you have to have some non-negotiable items and deal-breakers included, right? Wink

jgreg29 · January 2012

danieleandwayne:

Personally, I think couple should really agree on their kids' names-- it's kind of a big deal, really. But like any good "deal" being brokered, you have to have some non-negotiable items and deal-breakers included, right?

I completely agree. I'm not comfortable with a name if both of us don't like it. The thing is we can both be a little insistent so it's doing this nicely that can be the challenge. ;-)

@Maeghan21 - I can live with the idea of using the same initials. Maybe I can suggest that. And Willis is awful for exactly the reason you state!

The funny thing is, we are set on a first middle name for both a girl and a boy since those are traditions in our family. Luckily, there are no girls in MH's family and the boy's name is the same! So, if we did initials, all we would need is a first name.

tanyamc81 · January 2012

maeghan21:
My problem with this? It's Willis. As in, whatcho talkin bout Willis.

This made me LOL!! I would have a problem with that too Wink

chayer227 · January 2012

It wasn't an issue with us, thankfully. I would have fought with DH if he wanted to name DS Jr. I truly believe that everyone deserves their own name and their own identity.

And, what if there ends up being more than one son? How does that make the non-Jr. son feel? My neighbors growing up were a set of twins - one was named after dad, the other (obviously) wasn't. How do you choose who is Jr and who gets just some other name?

But, more practically: how do you differentiate which person's attention you're trying to get when shouting a shared name up the stairs? Big Smile My name is Mel and my dad was Phil - when my mom shouted to us in our rooms upstairs, we couldn't tell the difference half the time. Food for thought. LOL.

MrsSweetpeaMagee607 · January 2012

I would have fought DH if he wanted a junior... his name is Joshua.. he goes by Josh... I am not a fan of either name, but I love DH so his name is just part of the package lol!

There are no juniors in my family, but my uncles son/grandson/great grandson all start with R... which I think is kinda cool... but I don't really like the names Roderick, Roderick (not a junior), Randal and Rylan... I like Rylan... not keen on the other...

and we totally not on purpose have the same initials as the boys (except Jack's middle name starts with D and DHs starts with A)

We thought about giving the boys our brothers' names as middle names... I like my brothers name but wouldn't use it as a first because I have an uncle with the same name and I never know who anyone is talking about... but we decided against it and just gave them original names because that was what we liked!

If we have a girl in the future she will probably have the same middle name that I have, as it is my mom's middle name and also my paternal grandmother's name...

meganinmaine · January 2012

chayer227:
My neighbors growing up were a set of twins - one was named after dad, the other (obviously) wasn't. How do you choose who is Jr and who gets just some other name?

Oh man. It never bothered me when people had two and the older was a junior, but when they come out at the same time? Come on.

I always loved the name Joshua, but I don't want any kind of junior and I don't think he does either, so that's out. We'll use his middle name as a middle name if we have a boy, but I don't like how it goes with any of the names I like, so we'll see. He claims it's a family name, but as far as I can tell, it's his middle name and his uncle's first name, so it's really more that he wants it to be a family name, I think.

I feel like I'm hyper-concerned with how potential names sound with our last name, so I'll probably end up not worrying about how it sounds with the middle name...I don't know anyone who uses their middle name in everyday life unless they go by it.

jgreg29 · January 2012

chayer227:

It wasn't an issue with us, thankfully. I would have fought with DH if he wanted to name DS Jr. I truly believe that everyone deserves their own name and their own identity.

And, what if there ends up being more than one son? How does that make the non-Jr. son feel? My neighbors growing up were a set of twins - one was named after dad, the other (obviously) wasn't. How do you choose who is Jr and who gets just some other name?

But, more practically: how do you differentiate which person's attention you're trying to get when shouting a shared name up the stairs? My name is Mel and my dad was Phil - when my mom shouted to us in our rooms upstairs, we couldn't tell the difference half the time. Food for thought. LOL.

These are all my concerns! My dad grew up in a family where names were passed down, particularly on my grandmother's side. Even though he wasn't named after his father, he was always known as Jimmy because there were so many other James and Jims. I cringe when people call my 60-year-old dad Jimmy.

SBTibbs · January 2012

DH briefly seemed interested in naming our son after him, but was quickly dissuaded. His dad is a jr (John) and instead of having his brother be the third, then named him Jonathan (just as confusing if you call shorten it to Jon!) I did want a jr for the reason's Mel listed and am glad I didn't have to fight more against it.

We did use family names for both kids first and middle names, which I think is just as nice of a way of honoring family heritage.

mrscjwatts · January 2012

When we were picking out names, one of the rules was,, we were not allowed to choose a name of someone we know (family, or otherwise). So this automatically rules out the JR. I don't think he cares for his name anyway.

My parents did the initial thing. My father and two brothers have the initials JDM and my mother and I have/had JAM. Which of course changes to JAW for me lol

Because I hated that all 5 of us were J's growing up, there will be no "J" names for us either. The only requirement now, is that the next daughter of mine will have a boys middle name, as I do.

s/o of picking out names

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