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@ Fetus Party?

 I just read an article (link below, but it is in French) about the new anglophone tradition called a Fetus Party where the soon-to-be parents gather everyone together and show off the latest 3D sonogram.

 The article says that this is a violation of intimacy between parent and child by showing a child to the world before the baby is ready to be viewed, the construction of a baby is intimate. It also suggests that it puts to much pressure for this future baby, that the parents will be disappointed that the pooping crying bundle of flesh will not live up to their heightened expectations (bundle of flesh being my indirect translation lol) 

Do you think women have become slightly exhibitionist when it comes to pregnancy and the developing baby? Is our fascination with bumps and baby-making going too far? Do you think that your pregnancy should be more of a private affair or was it/will it be something you want to shout from the mountain tops and broadcast to anyone who will listen?

I thought that the articles take was a little to far-fetched, but also a party to show off a sonogram seems weird to me too!

 

http://www.magicmaman.com/,foetus-party-faut-il-tout-montrer,3110,2004467.asp

Re: @ Fetus Party?

  • imagemyblueangel19:

    The article says that this is a violation of intimacy between parent and child by showing a child to the world before the baby is ready to be viewed, the construction of a baby is intimate. It also suggests that it puts to much pressure for this future baby, that the parents will be disappointed that the pooping crying bundle of flesh will not live up to their heightened expectations (bundle of flesh being my indirect translation lol)  

    To me that sounds like a violation of adult intelligence and gauging how much other people give a sh*t about your fetus.

    I think the article (didn't read it, I admit) is waaaaaaay overthinking what is simply a stupid idea. 

    image
  • In a related vein, I will add that this:

    http://www.thepartypressblog.com/2012/01/a-potty-training-party-peace-out-pampers/

    Has made me lose faith in humanity.  There's no way we can compete with Tiger Moms and 12-hours-per-day studies pulling sh!t like this.

    ETA: I speak English, really I do... 

    image
  • imagewise_rita:
    imagemyblueangel19:

    The article says that this is a violation of intimacy between parent and child by showing a child to the world before the baby is ready to be viewed, the construction of a baby is intimate. It also suggests that it puts to much pressure for this future baby, that the parents will be disappointed that the pooping crying bundle of flesh will not live up to their heightened expectations (bundle of flesh being my indirect translation lol)  

    To me that sounds like a violation of adult intelligence and gauging how much other people give a sh*t about your fetus.

    I think the article (didn't read it, I admit) is waaaaaaay overthinking what is simply a stupid idea. 

    This. That's also how I feel about gender reveal parties. It's one of those things that's important to the parents and maybe the grandparents, but does anyone else really care? 

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  • I agree with what everyone else has said, by 'party' that means lots of people and  besides parents and maybe grandparents no one else cares that much about your fetus!

    My nanny's daughter had a private 3D scan at 13 weeks so she could find out the gender of the baby- so from 13 weeks onward the baby has had a full name and we received a Christmas card 'from' the 13 week old 'baby' (or should I say fetus). I find it very weird.

  • imagedublin:

    My nanny's daughter had a private 3D scan at 13 weeks so she could find out the gender of the baby- so from 13 weeks onward the baby has had a full name and we received a Christmas card 'from' the 13 week old 'baby' (or should I say fetus). I find it very weird.

    seriously??? that is all kinds of weird. I just got freaked out by the mental image of a fetus wishing me merry christmas...makes for some weird mental imagery!

  • imagewise_rita:

    In a related vein, I will all that this:

    http://www.thepartypressblog.com/2012/01/a-potty-training-party-peace-out-pampers/

    Has made me lose faith in humanity.  There's no way we can compete with Tiger Moms and 12-hours-per-day studies pulling sh!t like this.

    holy crap. *jaw drop*  wow. who knew that learning not to piss yourself deserved such a large celebration. Those kids are going  to grow up sadly disappointed that all of life's little triumphs don't end up with a massive party to reward them for their efforts

  • imagemyblueangel19:
    imagedublin:

    My nanny's daughter had a private 3D scan at 13 weeks so she could find out the gender of the baby- so from 13 weeks onward the baby has had a full name and we received a Christmas card 'from' the 13 week old 'baby' (or should I say fetus). I find it very weird.

    seriously??? that is all kinds of weird. I just got freaked out by the mental image of a fetus wishing me merry christmas...makes for some weird mental imagery!

    That is pretty ridiculous.  Though I am really opposed to calling a fetus by its "name" before it's born. 

    At 13 weeks what is there even to see in a 3D scan?  Aren't they pretty blob-ular by that time still? 

    image
  • I have a feeling the same people who do this are the same ones obsessed with a pretty, pretty princess wedding.

    That said, we did share photos of the ultrasound with our parents and siblings, and we called them as soon as we found out the gender. If we lived close to them, we probably would have had dinner with them and told them over dinner. so I guess that would have been a gender reveal party of sorts.

    imageBabyFruit Ticker
  • imagekelly321:

    This. That's also how I feel about gender reveal parties. It's one of those things that's important to the parents and maybe the grandparents, but does anyone else really care? 

    Really?  People have these?  I thought that was a joke when I heard about them first...

    Lilypie Trying to Conceive 21 to 37 day cycle tickers
  • imagekelly321:
    imagewise_rita:
    imagemyblueangel19:

    The article says that this is a violation of intimacy between parent and child by showing a child to the world before the baby is ready to be viewed, the construction of a baby is intimate. It also suggests that it puts to much pressure for this future baby, that the parents will be disappointed that the pooping crying bundle of flesh will not live up to their heightened expectations (bundle of flesh being my indirect translation lol)  

    To me that sounds like a violation of adult intelligence and gauging how much other people give a sh*t about your fetus.

    I think the article (didn't read it, I admit) is waaaaaaay overthinking what is simply a stupid idea. 

    This. That's also how I feel about gender reveal parties. It's one of those things that's important to the parents and maybe the grandparents, but does anyone else really care? 

    Agreed, it's like your wedding--no one will care about it as much as you do.  Except grandparents perhaps. 

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  • I've never heard of this before.  While it does sound strange and awkward to me and never in a million years would I attend one, the article appears to be grasping at straws.
  • imagewise_rita:

    In a related vein, I will add that this:

    http://www.thepartypressblog.com/2012/01/a-potty-training-party-peace-out-pampers/

    Has made me lose faith in humanity.  There's no way we can compete with Tiger Moms and 12-hours-per-day studies pulling sh!t like this.

    ETA: I speak English, really I do... 

    This party is absolutely overflowing with precious ?potty? detail. From the tootsie rolls in the little toilet to the ?I gotta go? Juice, it just does not get more creative. Each child took home two favor bags ? a #1 and a #2 (with corresponding treats to their respective actions? yellow jelly beans and tootsie rolls!) They also each received a potty chart & a sticker sheet. What little one wouldn?t think underwear was cool after this!?

    Ummm, I think that mom seriously needs to up her meds, or stop the happy pills, one. Not sure which.

    "Cause life
  • In a related note, my FSIL likes to carry aorund her doppler so random friends and extended family can listen to the baby's heartbeat. That strikes me as odd.
    Mum to W (4) and M (nearly 2)
  • imagewelshgirl:
    In a related note, my FSIL likes to carry aorund her doppler so random friends and extended family can listen to the baby's heartbeat. That strikes me as odd.
    This is too funny!!
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers PitaPata Dog tickers Screen Shot 2012-11-15 at 8.25.16 AM
  • Wow. I don't know if I'd go to something called a fetus party (and even less to a potty party). My SIL had a gender reveal party of sorts but it was just with the future grandparents and parent's siblings, which I think is fine (it was sweet to sweet my PIL so excited to cut the cake and find out). I agree that including friends in something like that would be ridiculous.

    Here they also have a habit to name the baby as soon as they find out the sex, and then refer to it by name all the time (like the christmas card thing) which kind of bothers me. I think it's a cultural thing.

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    Anniversary
  • I get that gender reveal parties,etc are weird and self-involved, but what's the problem with referring to your child by name before its birth? Most people find ouy the sex around 20 weks and the earliest a baby can survive prematurely is around 25 weeks so it's pretty much all formed by then. If a child can survive outside the womb why is it weird to call it by name?
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • imagewelshgirl:
    In a related note, my FSIL likes to carry aorund her doppler so random friends and extended family can listen to the baby's heartbeat. That strikes me as odd.

     So few people can actually correctly use a doppler that the people are probably happy listening to the placenta or your FSIL's heartbeat!

  • Wow, I just looked at the 'potty party' some people have way too much time and money on their hands.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • imageLadyMadrid08:
    I get that gender reveal parties,etc are weird and self-involved, but what's the problem with referring to your child by name before its birth? Most people find ouy the sex around 20 weks and the earliest a baby can survive prematurely is around 25 weeks so it's pretty much all formed by then. If a child can survive outside the womb why is it weird to call it by name?
    Agreed. 

    And if you think gender reveal parties are something no one does, you haven't spent much time on the bump ;) I also find them odd and AW-ish, but to each their own I suppose.  

  • imagePublius:
    I've never heard of this before.  While it does sound strange and awkward to me and never in a million years would I attend one, the article appears to be grasping at straws.

    Ditto. That said, I do think entirely too much about every aspect of everyone's lives, from their fetuses (feti?) to what they had for breakfast, is shared these days thanks to blogs, facebook, etc. Nonetheless, I think this extreme level of over-sharing is hardly newsworthy.

    Photobucket Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • yea - totally lame IMO

    I documented a LOT of my pregnancy - photos, weekly updates, etc

    but I just put it all on my blog - including my scan photos - but I like the blog thing - that way if someone cares - they can come & look & read about it, if they don't care - don't look!

    I do agree that a party like that is assuming people care WAY more than they do about stuff like that - a baby shower is enough!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imageMintChocoChip:
    imagekelly321:
    imagewise_rita:
    imagemyblueangel19:

    The article says that this is a violation of intimacy between parent and child by showing a child to the world before the baby is ready to be viewed, the construction of a baby is intimate. It also suggests that it puts to much pressure for this future baby, that the parents will be disappointed that the pooping crying bundle of flesh will not live up to their heightened expectations (bundle of flesh being my indirect translation lol)  

    To me that sounds like a violation of adult intelligence and gauging how much other people give a sh*t about your fetus.

    I think the article (didn't read it, I admit) is waaaaaaay overthinking what is simply a stupid idea. 

    This. That's also how I feel about gender reveal parties. It's one of those things that's important to the parents and maybe the grandparents, but does anyone else really care? 

    Agreed, it's like your wedding--no one will care about it as much as you do.  Except grandparents perhaps. 

    I totally agree with MCC.

    I only give my family updates because I know no one else really cares!

    As for these potty parties, who the hell has this much time on their hands? 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I say a potty party is only ok for a developmentally challenged child who needs that kind of incentive. And the guests for said party should be: mom, dad, siblings. period. Possibly a very involved aunt, uncle, or grandparent.

    That's about it, though. I can't think of another acceptable scenario.

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  • At 13 weeks, you can see limbs and something somewhat like a face. I wouldn't say it's blobular. I know some people are freaked out by u/s, esp. 3D so I'm not going to PIP it, but here's a 3D 13-week if you wanna see an example. (not mine)

    I'll be honest, I'd go to a fetus party if I was invited, just because I just think u/s is cool. BUT I would only go if they already knew at the time of scheduling the party that everything was ok. No one wants to show up and find out there's some big issue with the baby. That's the only real problem I see with this. It may be self-absorbed or whatever, but if there are people who want to throw the parties and people who want to attend, then eh. To read into the existence of the party as an indicator for what kind of parents they will be or what kind of problems the child will have in the future is just laughable.

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • Oh, and I referred to my girls by their names before they were even conceived, so?.
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