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My boyfriend never wants to have sex
About us...my husband and I have been together for almost 2 years and if I'm lucky, we might have sex twice a month. For the past 6 months our sex life has been almost nonexistent. He's never in the mood. He always makes an excuse like he's too tired, etc. I work a very stressful job and work very long hours and I can still make time for him. He has told me that ever since the birth of his son 2 years ago (from a previous relationship) that he hasn't really been that interested in sex. Sorry, but I call BS on that one because when we first got together we had an amazing sex life. He says he's not cheating on me (I believe him) and he says that he thinks I'm beautiful and sexy and he is attracted to me and I'm trying really hard to believe him, but it's getting to the point where he's made me feel unattractive and unwanted. We've tried talking about this and he says that he feels like I just want sex all the time and that I never just want to have him hold me when we are in bed. I've gotten to the point where I don't even try anymore and have lost my sex drive. I just don't know what to do anymore. This isn't a reason to end our marriage, but something has got to give. My self-esteem is very low now and him not wanting me is the reason. Ladies, if you have any advice, it would be greatly appreciated.
Re: My boyfriend never wants to have sex
So is he your boyfriend or your husband?
I'd also like to know more about your timeline. He has a two-year-old child by another woman and the 2 of you have been married for almost 2 years?
Are you married to this guy legally or not -- or are you in a committed relationship and calling him your "husband"?
This also is what my sentiments are, also:
So is he your boyfriend or your husband?
I'd also like to know more about your timeline. He has a two-year-old child by another woman and the 2 of you have been married for almost 2 years?
Because if you and he are not married, you might as well call it a day. Why would you want to stay with a boyfriend who never is in the mood for sex?
The relationship has run its course or he's emotionally checked out or both. If you are dating him, you might as well cut your losses, go -- and find a guy who is on the same page as you regarding sex and sexual activity.
He's got a son that is 2. How the heck long have you been with this guy -- and how much "time off" from that former relationship did he have before he began dating you? Seems like you and he rushed into a relationship in a hurry if he hooked up with you not long after the birth of his child.
(and if seeing another woman while he's been with you for the last 2 years to the extent where there is a child because of that union....don't ask me what I think of that one.)
If you are legally married to him, the situation is a bit more complicated.
You need to sit down adn tell him what you told us.
He owes it to you to meet you at least halfway on this - sex once or twice a week would be great; I can't see why he would not be rarin' to go and eager to meet that requirement.
What this is about with him is his character, his willing to accommodate you and ensuring you are happy and satisfied.
Do as i suggested: have a good long and frank discussion about your sex life and do it when you are out of the bedroom.
You and he not only need to communicate, you need to work on this together as a team -- and if he still won't ante up or comply or do anything to ensure your satisfaction and happiness, you've got a great deal to contemplate and face the music on. You did not get married to eventually wind up with a roommate.
A guy who complains he only wants to cuddle?
Never heard of it. What planet is he from, anyway?
Where thi is at:
He may have decided not to have sex with you any longer (for only reasons he can give), he may have checked out of the relationship, he's having an affair or the relationship may be over. Do what's right by you and you get down to the bottom of this issue and make sure the solution is one that is satisfactory to you. GL.