Starting Over
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
---------starryfish
Did you break up with your BF? 
(That was you, right?)
Sorry for calling you out if you don't want to talk about it.
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Re: ---------starryfish
Please don't feel like you have to! I was just thinking about you when I saw you post and just hoped that it went as well as those things can.
Its okay, I don't mind at all.
So on Monday night I decided to have a talk with him about one dealbreaker that would make me walk away. The dealbreaker was he only wants bio kids, is against fertility stuff and adoption. I told him that I can't compromise on this and bc of that I needed to walk away. I ended up leaving his place and he called me on my way home. We talked some more, he said he "didnt know" if he could do fertility/adoption if it came down to it (before he was a flat out 'no'). I told him that I need to be with someone with is open to other methods since I have a higher chance to be infertile bc of a condition i have. I got home and he ended up calling me again. We talked some more and he decided that since he really does want kids, that he would be open to consider other methods (except IVF, which is fine with me). I was NOT expecting him to change his mind. I decided to give him another shot since he did change his stance on it.
I am still unsure if that was the right move for me. I am afraid I am mentally checked out already since I had decided so far in advance that I wanted to break up with him and I had already started planning my new single life. I talked to my therapist about it yesterday and she told me that I can take my time and don't have to decide right away if I am checked out. She also told me that if i DO decide to leave, that I am leaving for valid reasons and am not running away.
I dont know what to do....I feel like there are STILL some issues that i am not 100% with and in the back of my mind, I wonder/feel like there is someone out there that would be better suited for me.
So there you have it....I am still confused.....
Hmm. I guess my first thought is that he might just be saying that because he wants to keep you. Do you know why that was his stance on the topic in the first place? Is it against his religion? Did he have a bad experience somehow? The answer to those questions might help me better understand his stance, and would also probably help me see if I should believe his "change of heart" or not.
I'm sorry you're going through this
It is not religion. His ex-gf did have a kid (10 year old) and he ended that relationship bc he decided that he could not accept the kid. He just really believes in "blood" and doing things naturally. If he had flip flopped right away, I would not have believed him; it took him several hours to do so.
I know it means he was not ready to lose me (he wants me to meet his parents next week, which is HUGE For him).
But there are other issues that bother me too that make me wonder if we are really a good match/compatible.
A part of me wants to be single again and just have no responsibilities to another person. But i dont know if that is what I "truly" want or just because it was fun imagining my life single again....