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Lurker - Coming out of "hiding"!!
Hi all!! I just wanted to say first and foremost - all of you ladies are amazing, and just reading your posts make me feel better because most of you are going through / have gone through the same things I have.
My background: I got married in 2007, had a baby in 2008, and separated in 2009. My XH thought I was cheating on him (was not, he was an extremely controlling / jealous person). He threatened to take my daughter away and "barely" let me have visitation. It was because of this that I didn't file for divorce for a year and a half after separation, because I was terrified of this coming true. I did file for divorce in 2010, and it was final June of 2011, which also allowed me to move away from him, and back to my family, which was my ultimate goal.
I have dated a few times since separation, and they have all ended disasterously. First one, he still had a girlfriend, which he failed to tell me. Second one, he was extremely abusive, and my parents basically had to move me home in a day. Third one, he ignored me for a month, and then decided he wanted to be with me, and basically became a stalker. Wow - writing it all out is hard to do.
Anyways - I just wanted to say hi and that I am going to start contributing!! Any questions - feel free to ask!! 
Re: Lurker - Coming out of "hiding"!!
Hello! Sounds like you've had a rough go about things but are on the journey upwards.
If I could recommend some books about abuse/manipulation. It sounds like you may still have some old habits that would be worth exploring and then breaking.
Here's some of my favorites:
"Co-Dependent No More"
"Who's Pulling YOUR Strings: Breaking the Cycle of Manipulation"
"Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry, Controlling Men"
Welcome! Sorry you have to go through this. I am also going through a divorce with a small child.
Welcome, sorry you had to go through all that, but hopefully it will make you stronger!
I second Achase's reading recommendations - I need to re-read/finish the first one and am currently reading the second.