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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: I wish I didn't look through this website...
Especially this page about infants in daycare.
http://www.daycaresdontcare.org/math.htm
Andrea, you can find a ton of studies and experts who will support both sides of an issue.
That's where YOU come in, though. YOU select a daycare and use your Mommy Sense that will tingle if you notice something not perfectly well about your child. You will build a relationship of trust so that he will tell you if he is not happy at "school."
Nothing takes the place of a mommy.
And I know lots of daycare professionals who love their jobs-- and take pride in the fact that parents trust them with their most precious possessions, as well as take that responsibility seriously.
You're going to be a great mommy-- whether you decide you need to stay at home or go back to work. Trust and believe in yourself! [hugs]
Having worked at a daycare center, having Evie in daycare and Sawyer going next week and now working on starting my own home daycare, this site is not accurate and is going to extreme. If you choose the right daycare, your child will get the attention, care and love. The baby room that Sawyer is going in has the most wonderful worker who is a grandmother to all the babies in the room. It is state law that all babies are held during feedings, and need position changed every half hour if awake. It is hard to leave your baby but if you made the right choice your children will be very muched loved and well taken care of.?
Evelyn has been going full time except during the summer and she loves it and most days I thave a hard time getting her to leave. I also find it helping her socially and interacting with Sawyer.
Keep your chin up! ?
I didn't even open the site. I just can't bring myself too but when i read what you wrote, I totally thought the same thing as Megan. Our DCP was standoffish the first few weeks but we finally found things to connect on and were able to talk openly about concerns, worries, triumphs, frustrations, etc that have to deal with my child. I've been pleasantly happy to see this relationship develop and wasn't sure what to expect. I know she kept her safe, but when she told me that she has been doing exercises to help strengthen DDs eyes even before we talked about our concerns about her eyes. I've seen the older kids be happy to come to daycare, be excited to see each other and happy to spend their days there. It's been a nice comfort to me.
Thanks ladies. I can't afford to stay home, so I don't really have a choice. I keep telling myself that by having me work I will be giving him a better life. I know that I will come to value our time during the evenings and weekends together. I think that by working all day and being away from him, we will appreciate each other more and the time we do have I will make sure it's actual quality time.
I think my biggest concern right now is that taking care of him during my maternity leave is a full time job. The ratio at his daycare is 4 kids to 1 teacher (or whatever they are called). I worry that he will lay there crying because they are tending to the other kids. I can't stand the thought of him not getting the same attention I can give him at home. I think I'm going to talk to our daycare about my concerns though.
I'm not reading that link.
He won't get exactly the same attention as he does at home.
But, I have worked in 3 different organizations and they all had at least 3 staff per room.
The max group size for an infant room is 8. So 2:8 = 1:4 with an extra person to do what is needed.
Plus since all the babies follow their own schedule some will be asleep and more staff are available to interact with the awake ones. There are also often older babies in the room counting to the 8 max. So Sebastian will get more attention while the babies who can chill play "alone" for a minute.
It all works out. And if it doesn't and something feels wrong, talk to them, and if it still feels wrong, start looking for other care.
This. I couldn't bear to open the link either. I think this post sums up being a good mommy. Your gut will tell you if your kiddo is happy or not. It helps for me to hear my DCP tell me on a daily basis how much she loves Abby. I know she cares for so much - seeing Abby literally RUN into the house closes the loop. She doesn't even look back most days. If she has to be with someone else, I'm glad it's this way. I keep reminding myself that it takes a village to raise a child :-) And then I really, really look forward to squeezing her when I get home.
I won't click on the link but I want to comment how great my daycare is so you know that there are awesome places out there and it is up to you to find the right fit.
I know that the women in the infant room love Abrahm. I know they love all the babies they have in there. They are always attentive and very caring. Abe was and still is a clingy baby and they accommodate that. They hold him a lot and carry him around. They feed him the specific things that I ask. They rock him to sleep. This morning he was crying when I left and the lead teacher rushed right over and snuggled him in and held him until he stopped crying (I was peeking in the window).
It sucks to have to drop your baby off at daycare but you have to look at your options and face the facts. Can you make it as a SAHM? If so do it. If not find a provider that you trust. I would love to be a SAHM but it isn't an option for us.
And stop reading bullshit on the internet!!
I also didn't read it - there are crazy people out there who can contort and twist words to support whatever the hell they want.
I would hope whomever "researched" and compiled this website is giving their children as much time & effort as they gave to this bull$hit. They obviously have huge self esteem issues or hang-ups about being home all day with their child if they have to bash the other side so extensively.
There are legitimate studies that show definite benefits to kids in daycare too. Neither SAH nor daycare kids have it "better", just different with different benefits.
Jake blowing out the candle at Katie's coming home party
Katie Belle
Kristen, Chad, Jake, Katie & Sadie the Wonderdog, est. 6/17/06
Whoever made that site should jump off a bridge - not you!
And the Comic Sans is killing my eyes.
I mean really. Someone writes the BS below (just one of their many "definitions" that made me stabby) ... I can't take them seriously even if they have shreds of a good point somewhere beneath the piles of crap.
Lame.
I didn't bother getting too deep- it isn't even a very well put together website to convey its point and I can't deal with digging that much.
I know that James' daycare thinks he's great. They really care and give him hugs and kisses and care about his well being, development, and things that seem off. They've seen things that I haven't and suggested I look into it- while being professional and caring.
Yeah, they don't love him like I do, but duh! They aren't his mom! His mom needs to work to pay the bills, and so I have no other choice. I knew when I talked and visited to them they were perfect. I haven't doubted them for a moment and adore them.
Don't sweat it... anyone who posts this as a "fact" on their "Diseases" page, is an idiot:
"...autism may be statistically linked to early non-maternal child care."
Oh! So that's what happened to my girl with autism - she had a SAHD! Glad we solved that mystery.
Doesn't quite explain my boy with autism with a SAHM - but I'm sure it was spending too much time with Nana on the weekends...