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depressing topic--

so hercules is my first dog--and i've never put a dog down or really know when it's "time"....he's old, has cancer, arthritis, and is just generally deteriorating.

at what point do you put a dog down? i've asked the vet several times, and they just keep telling me "quality of life"---- 

he still seems happy--but he's hurting. he can hardly stand up on his own, he slips and falls, his tumors are growing so big he's losing bladder control and now pees 8-10x's a day (which leads to multiple accidents per day), he is also losing control of #2 (or it just hurts too much to stand up) that he just goes on the ground while he's laying there.

*but* he is definitely still happy. he still loves food (i heard that when they stop eating is when they don't have the will to live anymore)..he loves food--he still eats a lot of it, loves treats, and he still gets up to bark if someone is at the door. or if there's somebody walking around outside.

so...tell me... how much longer do we do this?

♥ bfp2 02/15/2012 ♥ edd 10/23/2013 ♥
♥ bfp1 06/14/2011 ♥ edd 02/22/2012 ♥
♥ baby jennlin born on 02/15/2012 ♥

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who says you can only wear your wedding dress once?

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jumped ship to the new and improved nest. back to TB for baby boards.

Re: depressing topic--

  • For past pets, we've used eating as a guide. Once they stop eating and drinking, you know it's time.

    On another sad note, that seems to be a correct indicator for people as well. My grandmother stopped eating, then stopped drinking, and passed a day or two later.  

  • Im no help as all our pets have gone on their own but I feel bad when people get to that point of having to decide what is best. I would say keep close eye and when its starts looking like his unhappy times are more than the happy it would be time to start thinking about it.
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  • I have never been through this, but... **HUGS** That has got to be one of the hardest things to deal with. :( I'm so sorry.
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  • The food (not eating) is a great indicator but really I think you just kind of *know*....
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  • I don't have any advice. I'm so sorry you're going through this. *hugs*
  • i'm so sorry jenn. i'd use the eating thing too.

    are you guys giving him any pain meds?

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  • So sorry, this sucks.  My mom went through this recently and it was really hard. 

    Our dog couldn't use the bathroom and stopped eating within a week, so my mom knew and the vet also told her it was time.  I think you know your dog better than anyone.  And they hide their pain so well, you never have any idea how much pain they're really in.  I think you just have to go with your gut on this one and be prepared to ball your eyes out for a day or two; make sure DH has time to give you lots of hugs.  Sorry!

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  • I've been through this a couple times and it is hard. So I'm sorry you have to come to this decision soon. My first dog had a brain tumor and when her bad days became more frequent than her good days, we put her down. By bad days I mean she never left her bed. Stopped greeting people at the door and just seemed in bad health. My second dog we had to put down was not able to get up anymore. Her back legs wouldn't work anymore and she too had tumors. We made the decision when she couldn't make it outside anymore to go to the bathroom. I understand why the vet says 'quality of life'. Because we know our animals best and we know when they are suffering. My advice would just be to keep an eye on Hercules and really watch him. If he's happy, that's great, but keep track of how his attitude changes. It's a big sign. Hope this helps!
  • Oh no!  I almost started crying reading this - I'm soooo sorry for you, jennlin.  I know how hard it is to have a sick pet.  :(

    In terms of making your decision - I can't remember exactly what your due date is, but it's sometime in February, right?  Do you think Hercules is doing well enough to hold on until the little one arrives, just so s/he can meet Hercules?  Even if they won't ever remember the meeting, you could snap some photos and you'll always have that to hold on to.

    If it appears that he won't make it that long... I would just look at Hercules and ask yourself - would you want to be in his shoes?  While he can't communicate with you directly, I'm sure you know what level of discomfort he's in because you've known him for so long, so just do for him what you would want done for you if you were in his situation (I know it sounds kind of weird to think of yourself in your dog's situation but I think you get what I'm saying).  

    We didn't actually have to put our first dog down; she got really sick really fast and died at home, but I am almost crying now thinking about it... and that was 12 years ago.  I can empathize and I hope you and H just do your best to cherish any good moments you get with Hercules now.  I am sooo sorry.  :(  

  • I'm so, so sorry Jenn. I don't really have any experience with putting down dogs as my past pets have gone on their own, but from what I've heard, eating/interest in what's going on is a big indicator. I know how important it is to you that Hercules meet your LO, so I'm crossing fingers hoping he can hang on until then. If he's still seeming interested in what's going on around him and his personality is still visible, he's probably ok for now. HUGS!!!

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  • thanks you guys for all the support, insight, knowledge, etc. i guess we do still have some time to go with him, since he still eats, acknowledges us, and overall still "there" mentally.

    he's on quite a regimen of pills - pain killers, steroids (for arthritis and reduction of tumors), anti-itch (his tumors are itchy), anti-acid (the cocktail of drugs make his tummy sensitive), and glucosomine for his arthritis.... 3 times a day-

    the vet says she's not sure if he'll meet the baby--and i'm really not sure if i want him to anymore. i think hercules deserves our 100% attention, and if he *and* the baby are here, the baby *will* be priority..and it makes me sad. i don't want him to be 2nd best at the end of his life. so i want him to either go quickly soon, or drag out for months. but...the latter isn't likely. Crying

    ♥ bfp2 02/15/2012 ♥ edd 10/23/2013 ♥
    ♥ bfp1 06/14/2011 ♥ edd 02/22/2012 ♥
    ♥ baby jennlin born on 02/15/2012 ♥

    image
    who says you can only wear your wedding dress once?

    honeymoon biomarried bioplanning bio
    jumped ship to the new and improved nest. back to TB for baby boards.
  • I was going to reply to this yesterday, but I honestly don't know what else to say that hasn't been said.

    I'm so sorry, honey, I know how hard this is for you. Just know you have our complete love and support!

    *hugs* 

    greenbaby
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  • So so sorry that you're going through this. I'm sure it's even harder emotionally being preggo. My parents said goodbye to our family 13 yo lab the day of our engagement pictures. They didn't tell us until the next day. It's such a hard thing to do but there comes a point when you will just know that it's time.

    I've always liked this story from a young boy to a vet when it was his dog's time to go: "People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life ? like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right? Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don?t have to stay as long."

    My heart breaks for you and I hope you give Hercules lots of hugs and cuddles.

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  • I have nothing helpful to add to this other than I hope you're doing ok throughout all this. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. <3
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  • **HUGS AND MORE HUGS** It's never easy. I've been there for the end for both my doggies and had to make the decision for my last cat (although he beat me to the punch and it ended up just making the process quicker by a few hours for him). With our German Shepherd, it was an obvious quality of life: she stopped getting up to greet my dad when he came home. The day she stopped even making a good effort to lift her head or thump her tail? That was time. It didn't make it easier to do it, but it showed she was in more pain than anything.

    And don't beat yourself up, I agree with your worries that you want him to meet baby, but you don't want him to spend the very end of his life being "second," either. Hopefully, he'll find a way to let you know he's ready.

    (and it won't be a few days of balling your eyes out, and that's ok! It's taken me 3 years to be able to think of the end of my kitty's days without bawling.)

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  • I'm soooo sorry that you have to go through this, especially with a baby on the way!  It's been almost two years since we put my childhood dog down.  She was almost 19, and she was the first pet I'd ever had.  She too couldn't get around much anymore, had accidents, and was on a lot of meds, and she was a little "alzheimer-y", but she was happy...you could just tell.  I would get so irritated when people would tell me "oh my goodness I can't believe you're keeping her alive", but when I'd ask when they would say goodbye, the answer was always, "You'll just know".  In the end, she aspirated some water and just couldn't cough it up, and the vets couldn't do anything for her. 

    Before she had the weird water issue, we had decided that we would use her appetite and general happiness as a gauge.  I could tell that walking hurt her, but when she was just hanging out on the couch with her food next to her, she was perfectly fine, so I wasn't going to put her down then, if that makes sense.

    Anyways, I don't know how helpful this was, but I thought I'd share how we had planned to handle the end of Freckles' time with us.

     HUGE HUGE HUGS!!!

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