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*Steps out of lurker closet*
I've been lurking for a few weeks and have determined that you are all actually wonderful and not at all crazy, so I thought it was time to say hello.
The short version of my story is that STBXH and I were in counseling, working on the fact that our life goals were really different, we had different views on the priority of our relationship, and some intimacy issues, and things were going well, I thought. Then I found some sketchy texts and (since I said this was the short version) found out that he'd been meeting a female friend of his at bars without telling me (just lying about what he did that night). It wasn't the first time I found sketchy texts but I decided it needed to be the last. I approached him about it in front of our therapist and we spent that night apart, and when I told him the next day that I thought we should split up he said "OK." That was a few days after Christmas, and we've been split ever since.
I moved out, got my own place (we had a house but I don't want anything to do with it and don't think I'll be living in this area much longer anyway) and got a lawyer. He got roommates.
So I think that's where I'm at right now. Putting my apartment together, rebuilding, all of that. Terrified about the idea of going on a date, but excited that it might happen...one day. Worried that no one would want to date me. But I'm definitely taking time for myself first. I've never actually lived alone and I love it so far.
Anyway, thanks for all the secret support you've given me so far! I hope, now that I'm not such a creepy lurker, I can give it right back to you.
Re: *Steps out of lurker closet*
I'm not currently in counseling. I'm in school and the semester just started, so between that, work, and moving, I haven't had a chance to find someone near me. But that's on my list for sure.
We were married just shy of 3 years. I'm still pretty young (under 30), and no kids, so I know I have plenty of time to work on myself and get to know me before I try to introduce someone else to this mess.
Hi! Really sorry that you're going through this, it definitely sounds like you're taking the right steps. How great that you're loving living on your own! (It took a while for me to get used to
)
What are you going to school for? How much longer? What do you do for work?
This board's "nest rep" always gives me the LOLZ.
Anyhoo, welcome. I know it's a dubious distinction to be here, but there's lots of support and advice to be found.
Welcome to the board. Everyone seems really nice and supportive on this board.
I hope to be a bit more active on this board as I am coming out of my shell.
I know! We've got our crazies, but so does every board.
Welcome, OP!
Thanks, everyone! It's nice to feel like I can reply now and not keep it all in
I'm getting my master's degree and have about a year left, so I feel like there's a lot of change ahead for me...but good change, you know?