Starting Over
dmndsr4eva
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Getting divorced is like someone dying...
I've heard people say this and I can say from my experiences it seems true. Although I wasn't married I was engaged with a small child. I just started reading the Pilot's Wife and completely broke down reading about her description of how she felt when she found out her husband died. So many of the emotions she was feeling sounded identical to the night my relationship ended. I guess it isn't this way for everyone, but for me it has been because I loved him so much.
"How often does the other woman get a happy ending?" Chuck Bass, Gossip Girl
Re: Getting divorced is like someone dying...
The grieving process is similiar, yes.
I agree with this in a way. There will also be married people who say that being dumped by your husband is worse than a fiancee, and someone who has been married 30 years and is getting divorced would tell you that it's worse than splitting with someone you've been married to for 5 years. Regardless, it sucks all around, even if it sucks to varying degrees. It could always be worse, but that's little consolation when you're the one in pain.
Speaking from a purely clinical standpoint, when I was in college we talked about life stressors. There's a scale they use to rate the physical and emotional impact of certain life changes. Death of a spouse carries the highest weight, divorce is #2. Losing someone else close to you rates a few spaces down from divorce, so just from that standpoint, it ranks up there with someone dying.
Divorces are very painful. Other things are more painful. There are a lot of different scenarios. Some people also handle the same situation very differently.
Basically it is complicated.
Agree with this
I agree with what the others are saying, but with you as well.
Either way, someone who was there regularly is gone for good.
Your world is rocked.
You are never the same person.
There's a hole.
There's reflection and tons of "what-ifs" in many cases.
It can all be sad no matter what, but when you are in the throes of it, it feels like death.
I agree with that. When you have someone in your life every single day and you expect to live out the rest of your life with them and you have children it is extremely devastating to all of the sudden have that taken from you. Even more devastating when it is taken from you and immidiately give to the idiot stick figure younger barbie doll like coworker.
I hope you're still in therapy.