September 2008 Weddings
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Is this a wedding no-no?
Friends of ours are getting married in Tampa next January (the ones I originally thought were having the shin-dig in Chicago).
They weren't going to be register for anything, saying that being present at the destination was "gift enough." Okay fine.
Yesterday they tell JP and me that they're going to register, but it's really only for people who can't make it to the wedding.
[side note: the wedding will only have about 30 people- inviting maybe 40 total]
Is it me, or is this outrageously tacky to intentionally have a super small wedding and then ask people [who you chose not to invite to the wedding] to buy you presents?
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Re: Is this a wedding no-no?
This is where I'm leaning.
I had a cousin who recently had a destination wedding that we weren't invited to. She had a shower that I was invited to. I was iffy on that, but not really that annoyed because we would not have even considered going to the wedding since it involved significant travel. I ended up sending a gift with my mom to the shower since I had a prior engagement.
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I agree with Kara.
I don't really have an issue at all with a bigger shower for a destination wedding. I have pretty much no desire to take a vacation for a wedding (traveling to a wedding is fine; taking a week off to go to an AI is not) so it kills that bird for me.
FF and I don't plan on registering anywhere -- I don't want any showers and we don't want people to bring gifts to our wedding. However...I've been reading things that say even if you really, truly don't want gifts, that you should still create a small registry somewhere. There's bound to be a person who wants to get you a wedding gift (even after you tell them NOT to), and it's better to be able to direct them to a small registry than get a something you'll likely never use/don't have a need for. Maybe that's what they're doing?
I think this is fine, too. You would only tell people if they ask. We had a couple gifts arrive in the mail from people who were not invited to our wedding (think my grandparents' siblings). We did not tell them about our registries, but they still wanted to give us something. It was very thoughtful and appreciated.
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The bolded part is what I am thinking is their motivation behind suddenly wanting to register. Which I have also heard.
The bolded part is what I am thinking is their motivation behind suddenly wanting to register. Which I have also heard.
Maybe you're both right about the bolded part. It just struck me a super odd after being "so against it" to begin with.
Maybe you're both right about the bolded part. It just struck me a super odd after being "so against it" to begin with.
That bold part is why we registered. I was against it, but a couple of people pointed out that it made things easier for people who are going to buy you a gift regardless.
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