When I was first diagnosed Bipolar I was on an inpatient psych unit to try to figure out medication. I was manic as hell and couldn't sleep. I was put on a mood stabilizer (m/s) and an antipsychotic (a/p). The meds helped but fukced up my balance which is obviously already messed up because of my Cerebral Palsy. I was less manic and doing better emotionally but my legs were so heavy I couldn't walk so I used a wheelchair to get around. Psychaitrist (who I no longer see) refused to change my meds since I was doing better.
Doc: You are so much better
Me: Yes but these side effects suck. I can't walk. Can we change something?
Doc: You could walk if you tried. The meds are fine.
Arguments ensue. Eventually I get put on more appropriate meds. I am still mad at him for just assuming I used the wheelchair to get attention. I suppose some people do but it isn't my first thought. So I believed this whole BVal thing which I guess is different because she is not advocating for herself. Now I feel duped by her.
Also, I look at the NY thing and can't buy/figure out why the kids would want to live with these outbursts. Maybe I am just naive. I also fear whenever I have new psych issues someone will accuse me of doing it for attention. I am a little overly sensitive to the suggestion of conversion.
Re: Confession
Do you mind if I ask you a few questions? I am trying to understand this a little better. Don't answer if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
Could you walk and it was difficult or could you not walk at all? How long did that last? Was it purely a meds thing and once you changed, your legs were fine again?
I get your perspective more and why you are sensitive to these things now. You are a person who trusts and who always gives the benefit of the doubt because it is what you wished for in that situation.