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OKC Guy Predicament

I posted about this in the WTF Wednesday post.....

Background: I recently decided to give the online dating thing a shot again.  Ex and I split up over a year ago.  I tried Match around 6 months after that and went on a lot of first dates.  I got frustrated and took a break from dating.

Now I'm on OKC and I get a lot of emails, but most I don't respond to.  I met a really great guy, we clicked right off the bat, when on a date, and then he told me he just wanted to be friends.  This was a couple weeks ago and we haven't been out again since.

Since then, he texts me almost daily.  90% of the time, he's the one to initiate contact.  He was texting me last night and his last text saying good night was "Xoxo."  Wtf?!  This is not the first time he's sent mixed messages.

I really want to call him out on this and say WTF?!  But I haven't said anything at all since.  I haven't heard from him today, but I'm sure I'll hear from him tomorrow at the latest.

What say you, SO?  Do I call him out on this or ignore it?  I know all about he's just not that into you, but why the hell is he doing this?  I've given him ZERO indication that a FWB arrangement would be acceptable, and I completely shut him down if he makes flirty comments.

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Re: OKC Guy Predicament

  • Classic FWB situation, but sounds like you already know that and wont fall into that trap.

    I would just ignore him until he sends you mixed messages again, then I would def call him out.  Just tell him you have enough friends and not interested in a FWB. 

    ETA.  Wouldnt surprise me if there arent at least a couple other women he is sending "mixed messages" to.

  • I'd stop texting him back.  There's no reason to proceed with anything, knowing that you're on two different pages with what you want.  You don't need a text buddy.  And you're a mom so you don't really have the time or energy to waste on someone who's toying with you like that.
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  • If he really wanted you, he'd be more serious about it. I'd just stop talking to him.
    It's just me and my Marlon now... and I LOVE it that way!
  • Yeah, throw that fish back. The minute he said he just wanted to be friends (and you met on a dating site), but he keeps texting you, means that he's putting you on the back burner for some possible midnight nookie if his other prospects don't work out.
  • Initially I thought maybe he and I could be friends.  Granted that's not what either of us went on OKC to find, but I do think he's a good person and someone I'd probably enjoy hanging out with.  But I think everyone's right in that he's trying to spin the just friends thing into a FWB situation and I don't have time for that.

    Next!  I do have a date set up for next Monday with a different guy.  Don't worry ladies...I haven't been sitting around waiting for this one.  I had a date this week too Smile

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  • Haha this is funny, I did not think this was a FWB situation. Man, I need to understand boys more. I thought maybe he changed his mind after telling you he wanted just a friendship. When you were totally okay with it, he might have found that attractive - the fact that you didn't get upset or freak out or act desperate.

    But yeah now after reading people's responses I just may be way off. I'm sort of now rethinking scenarios I've had like this in the past...darn.

  • imagejm5855:

    Classic FWB situation, but sounds like you already know that and wont fall into that trap.

    I would just ignore him until he sends you mixed messages again, then I would def call him out.  Just tell him you have enough friends and not interested in a FWB. 

    ETA.  Wouldnt surprise me if there arent at least a couple other women he is sending "mixed messages" to.

    This. Call this little slut out.

    Vacation
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