Trouble in Paradise
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
If you know what "eechie" means come in
I don't mean for this to be cryptic and will PM someone when I figure out who can help me. Even I am on the conversion bandwagon now. Why does this bother me so much?
Re: If you know what "eechie" means come in
I know that, but I don't understand what she's trying to say in her post?
Everytime I see eechie I automatically think lychee and then I want Chinese food.
A lot of us were fooled. You're a caring person that likes to give people the benefit of the doubt. There's nothing wrong with having that quality.
I think that there are those on here who felt bad for her if she was really suffering through all these things. I mean, not being able to walk and feeling like your family is a trainwreck that keeps hurting you. All of these things made her sympathetic and people want to help you when you post things like that.
I am with you on feeling really duped. There were those who really did try to help her have some constructive ways to make it all work, but all Bval wanted was for someone to go, "oh you poor thing. Its perfectly ok for you play on your husband's insecurities about his terminally ill mother that died. Yeah, you poor thing, go ahead and play video games all day & get waited on hand/foot" She didn't want solutions. She wanted the attention and people to feel sorry for her.
Its only when she went off the deep end and gave ALL of us the middle finger that my sympathy for her went away. I am not sympathetic to someone who wants to be the perpetual victim. Its one thing to have real health issues that make life difficult, but its another to be so incredibly fragile that you can't function.
I used to think she was truly sick with something grave. Now I think a lot of it is in her head and she just keeps working herself up in order to have something to bytch about. It would be entirely too easy to get real help and function. Its easier to live off your husband, and be a big baby all day long.
It bothers me too, and I have yet to see today's blog post. I should go read it. Talk it out Julie. I am sure you are not the only one feeling really stupid.
I have pretty much stayed out of this entire saga, but I do want to just say one thing
If BVal has conversion disorder or somatoform disorder, these are both very real mental disorders that people struggle with. To her, everything she is going through is very real...she truly feels the pain and truly does struggle. To others it may all seem completely fake.
Now, if she was diagnosed with malingering or even factitious disorder...that would be completely different since both of these mental disorders involve complete fabrication or exaggeration of the physical issues. Some people that suffer from these intentionally go about making their physical issues worse.
I don't know all of BVal's story, but from what I have read (and in my personal opinion), she has a very serious mental disorder (or possibly a combination) that is being overlooked or misdiagnosed.
I know a lot of you are truly annoyed by her situation, and I'm not trying to defend her BUT mental disorders are very serious. I think a lot of people are misinformed about them, and a lot of people don't realize that there truly are neurological disorders that can disable/cripple a person physically.
I agree that it sucks we were all fooled by someone who appeared to be very nice. I don't understand why some people lie on these boards about their life. It's pretty pathetic. I do think you internalize things and take them personally when they really aren't yours though Julie. Maybe this is something to talk to your therapist about.
Have you thought about finding some activities that you would enjoy to keep your mind from obsessing over things you can't control?
Peanut, I think what's making most of us call horseshit is the fact that she kept all this pathology well hidden until she was considered a reg, and then she opened the box, so to speak. And I do think many of us are well aware of somatoform disorders.
No doubt at all, Peanut. I believe it is serious what Bval is going through. What I think really works against her is to alienate people on this board who were ready & willing to help her talk it out. I mean, a couple people called her out and she had a meltdown on the entire board. Its really hard to want to continue to support someone when they basically tell you to F off, KWIM?
I really hope they are able to pinpoint what is going on with BVal's disorder and she is able to get ALL the help she needs. It was just poor form to burn bridges here.
I 100% get where all of you are coming from, and again, I'm not defending her....just food for thought to keep the conversation rolling really.
Broc, I am sorry if I came off like a know-it-all...didn't mean to offend.
Edith, I agree!
yea, I missed a lot. Like I said, I havent really followed her story/situation until the falling out.
I used to post every flipping day, but it's been a couple years since I've been on here regularly, so frankly, every time I see a screename with "Val" in it, my mind drifts to myvalentine2004...she rocks.
I have a huge issue with people that dish it out, but can't take it in return. So, maybe it's a good thing I'm just now hearing about all this.
What have you been accused of making up and by whom? If you don't mind me asking.
The highlights:
YAY I GOT 7 hugs today and I knew the whole bag was around so I bothered DH to tell me exactly where it was so I could eat it all.
Doctors won't give me my own medical records. I have to wait around hoping they'll see me. I'M waiting on everyone to do things for ME.
I want DH to stay home on Friday so he can take me to Petsmart and buy our friend a toy.
I feel better today so we're going out to eat with friends. They may come over after. CAN'T wait to see Annie!
and there's nothing really to report at all from the newest blog entry.
Bingo. The fact that she was able to turn her crazy on and off makes me believe she's a master manipulator that has crawled way too far up her own ass. I don't even feel sorry for Brandon - I think he's a Fixer and is getting his own jollies from this situation. Maybe he's into the idea of some threeway marriage-type thing with BVal and Annie, who knows.
I think maybe you should step back from the forums or chatrooms if this is a problem you struggle with it. I take everything I read on here with a huge grain of salt. You shouldn't feel so duped or cheated by someone you've never really met. For all we know, every single person on this board could be the alter-ego of a 57 year old man. That's the internet.
more info here: http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/63151362.aspx
Damnit! you caught me... Time to make a new SN.