Starting Over
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
What to say to a four year old...
I'm 90% certain my marriage is over. I'm feeling as good as I can about it...I know it's the best decision for me and also for my 2 boys -- ages 1 and 4. I don't know what to tell my 4 year old. Right now we've been saying that daddy is gone for work, he was gone fishing for the weekend (both of these things were true, but the real reason he did those things was to not be here). Now he keeps asking when daddy is coming home to stay and it kills me. I can't even begin to form words. He loves his daddy and this will tear him apart -- it's almost worth staying in the marriage -- but I know that isn't the best choice. Can anyone offer suggestions?
Thanks.
Re: What to say to a four year old...
My son was 4 when I left my XH. I think what you say to him really depends on what you have decided to do which doesnt' really sound clear at this time. Are you separating? Getting a divorce? Is he still going to see his dad? How often? If you have a better idea of what the plan is, I can try to help you figure out how to say it to your son. And I'm sure he'll be fine. My son doesn't even remember when we all lived together (he is 6 1/2 now)
Thanks for the response. I don't think the conversation is ever easy, but I think because nothing is firm, it's even harder. I don't know where H will live. I don't know how often DS will see him. I would say that we are separating right now, but divorce feels inevitable to me. And my husband won't talk logistics with me because he's so angry/hurt/emotionally unstable. So I feel stuck. This doesn't help much, does it?