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Did I do the right thing?
My brother left his wife 11 years ago. She was very controling and he was not perfect (meaning he did things he should not have). So when he left she would not let anyone in our family see my niece or nephew. (She had a son before they met and changed his name but my brother never adopted him) So, 11 years later, I find my neice. I contacted her and she talked to me, at the same time my brother found her and contacted her. They talked for a while and then her mom got mad. So she deleted me and my brother.
I found her today and sent her this message....
I wanted to give you my number. . I don't care about anything but I would like Jaysa to know her cousin! And I want to talk to my neice! I will never say anything to anyone about talking to you if that's what you want. But I love you and Jaysa wants to know her older first cousin!
Re: Did I do the right thing?
No, they live in NC
She is 19 now. When I talked to her last she was 18 and her grandma paid for her phone. They did not want her having anything to do with our side of the family. My brother told her he would buy her a phone and send it to her but she was worried about what her mom and grandma would think. So, now IDK why she can't talk to me but I let her know I will not tell my bro we even talk. It's hard...
She is 19 now. When I talked to her last she was 18 and her grandma paid for her phone. They did not want her having anything to do with our side of the family. My brother told her he would buy her a phone and send it to her but she was worried about what her mom and grandma would think. So, now IDK why she can't talk to me but I let her know I will not tell my bro we even talk. It's hard...
I was going to ask how hold she is... Since she's 19, and old enough to make her own decisions about who she keeps in contact w/, I think its okay that you contacted her.
However, if her Mother asks her not to talk to you, i think you have to respect those wishes. .. What would you do if it was the other way around? No snark - honest question.
Honest, my brother was a *** to her not the kids.And, she was a b8tch to him. (I didn't live with them so IDK what went on in the house when they were alone. We were always very nice to her and the kids. She got mad at him and told him he nor his family would ever see the kids again. And she moved with her mom.
I would hope that I'm never so spiteful that I would keep my DD away from family that has been nothing but great to her.
It doesn't hurt to try if you want to have a relationship with her.
My brother's ex took his two sons away from him 9 years ago and changed her name and left the state so he has not seen his kids and he can't find them.
It is very sad. I know how you feel so good luck!