Starting Over
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
STBX and I had mediation yesterday...
...And I think it went pretty well. We decided on a 60/40 kind of arrangment. He will only have the children on the 6 days he has off from work. His work schedule is odd - he works 8 days on/6 days off. I will have the kids 8 days in a row, he will have them 6 days. As far as child support - he is paying $600/month, plus half of daycare. Altogether, he is providing $1,034 a month for the children.
Do you think this is a fair agreement? I am OK with it for now. It's a temporary agreement. I want to see how my son holds up with the 6 days-in-a-row with STBX. He is very attached to me and I'm worried how he will adjust.
Re: STBX and I had mediation yesterday...
He makes $35,000 more than me.
I can't determine if CS is fair or not because it depends on salary and location of living area(LCOL to HCOL ranges). Though I am curious about the days off your stbxh has.
How old is DS? And does stbx live close or far (concerning sickness and school)
Is STBX planning to take DS to daycare even though he has those 6 days off or he plan to have DS stay home?
DS and DD will be at home with STBX during that time. DS is 4 and goes to PreK part time right now. It works out that I will be taking DS to school when he is with me. STBX has DS and DD Thurs-Tues and works Wed-Wed. It's hard to explain without looking at a calendar. For example, STBX returns to work today. He will work until next Wednesday, and then he will have off next Thursday until the following Tuesday. He will have the children during that time.
It's not a custody schedule I would want to manage, but that's just me. I guess my concern would be how confusing that might be for school when the kids are old enough. How will the school know which parent to send them home with or what bus to ride, kwim?
This is what I was thinking and lugging stuff back and forth for school age children.
All in all, I think you got better than fair share of CS considering stbxh will be home on the days that he has them. It almost seems like he is with them more because of that and he gets no days off for himself.
It sounds good on paper, but how will you manage not seeing your kids for 6 days in a row. I know I couldn't handle that.
To answer the poster who asked about when is school, bus schedules, lugging stuff back and forth from one house to the other ... these things aren't always an issue. My ds is 5 and in kindergarten. His school is in my neighborhood, but his dad only lives a mile from us. There are no busses here. Everyone drops the kids off at school. So on the morning each week when ex has ds, he drops him off. I drop him off the other mornings. DS keeps his homework folder in his backpack at all times so homework is at which ever house he is at that night. If he forgets something at my house, his dad swings by after he picks him up from school and gets it, and vice versa. It really isn't a big deal if you keep organized.