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Hard Week, Time to Hike It Out
Alright, I need to just take a time out from life. This week has been really emotional. A friend from high school and I reconnected on Facebook 7 or 8 years ago. I've gotten to watch her journey as she gave birth to two amazing kids. Two and a half years ago, her daughter was diagnosed with cancer. She's undergone rounds and rounds of chemo, losing her hair and becoming paralyzed on the left side of her face. She was still a spunky little kid through it all, and it's been really inspirational to watch her journey and battle. The community held countless fundraisers to support the family, and I even took my dad to the latest one. He remarked how normal she seemed, running around the restaurant, laughing and chasing the other kids. She was getting better, and then she wasn't. Last Friday, my friend's daughter was really really sick. She passed away on Saturday. She was 4. When I heard the news, I just cried and cried. I felt like the world stopped. Of all the injustices in the world, a 4 year old child dying of cancer has to be close to the top of the list. The rest of the week has been filled with tears, embarrassing tears when I was caught multiple times just crying in my cube by my coworkers.
Thursday was the wake, and we were all encouraged to attend. I didn't want to, but I figured I wouldn't be much of a friend if I didn't go and offer my support. To say that I dreaded the whole ordeal is an understatement. She has been the 4th person that I knew to have died this year. I wasn't sure if I could take it. Watching my friend at the wake was so inspirational. She is, without a doubt, one of the strongest people that I have had the pleasure of meeting. She didn't cry, and she comforted those of us (myself included) who were upset/tearing up/etc. She's got the mom back rub/pat down solid. I'm not sure if she is just numb because of what she's going through, but her calmness and stoicism is harrowing, no doubt. I only hope that she's got the support that she needs once everything sets in.
I'd like to put it out there that I don't think I can handle anyone else dying within the next 5 or so years. I'm serious.
"Always love. Don't wail til the finish line."-Nada Surf
Re: Hard Week, Time to Hike It Out
I'm not the best with words when it is so emotional, but I am so sorry that you and your friends and family have to deal with this. Cancer is never fair, and even moreso when it takes someone so young.
My cousin (he's now almost 16) was first diagnosed with lukemia at the age of 4, was in remission, and then relapsed by age 6. His sister then donated bone marrow for a transplant. I learned so much from my cousin and that side of the family. It amazed me at how much strength and optimism they had. They reached out to their community, were more involved than most family would ever think of being, and every day my Aunt posts something inspirational on her facebook. I can't even begin to describe all of the trips they've been invited to (they read books with the first lady, I can't remember which one). They took something so potentially tragic and made something better out of it. Of course, he was lucky to win his battle, but my point is that your only option is to be strong in a situation like this, or you wont survive mentally (I've seen the other side of this as well).
It's so unfortunate that this happened, and my heart goes out to you and everyone who was hurt by this. The only thing you can do is hold onto those amazing memories you have of her being an energenic and resilient child, and honor that.
((hugs))
Good for you for going on a hike. Take care of yourself. Let us know if you need anything.
I am so sorry to hear that
When I was in 5th grade, a good friend of mine passed away from Leukemia. I remember thinking, even at that age, that it wasn't fair. So many years later, and I still don't understand why it happens. The little girl's friends and family are in my thoughts
January 2, 2010
EDD October 10, 2013