Trouble in Paradise
res932
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Why does this bother me?
3 months ago I had a beautiful baby boy, my first. During the pregnancy and afterwards my DH and I went through a rough patch and I started taking Zoloft for my anxiety and also to keep me from getting as upset as quickly. We also did about 2 months of couples therapy. In the meantime, my ex has messaged me and told me that he is getting married and his new fiance is pregnant. I am not sure why this bothers me so much. My ex isn't someone I want to be with. He doesn't really have a job, and with this new baby he will have had 3 babies with 3 different women. My DH is a great provider and allows me to be a SAHM. He is good with DS and SS but DH isn't very affectionate with me. I love DH but I am looking for more affection and despite how many times I tell him this it doesn't seem to help. Now when I find out this stuff about my ex it is making me jealous. Why is this?
Re: Why does this bother me?
You're imagining that he and his new fiancee are happier than you are. Since he has kids all over town, I'm doubting that's really the case.
I think you are right. I don't want to be with him, but since he is an ex I also feel like I don't want him to be happier than we are. I think it makes it harder because DH and I have been going through a rough patch.
Was this ex affectionate in the way your H is not?
You're comparing your life to your ex's life. That's not healthy, don't do that.
It is up to you to be as happy as you can be in your own life. The only thing you're giong to hear from everyone else is what they aspire to be, not what they actually are.
Having a baby with another woman doesn't prove your ex is happier. It only proves that both his and his fiancee's reproductive organs are functioning.
Please remind yourself of this as often as you need to considering that if you keep fixating on this douchebag's fertility, you'll put a wedge in your own marriage making you more miserable by default.
Click me, click me!
I haven't posted in awhile but....
All the pp's are WRONG!
Here is the real deal, when we break up with someone, they are supposed to be so crushed over the loss of us that they cannot imagine life with anyone else. They just mope around the world the rest of their days wondering how they can fix it, what did they do to screw up and how they lost the best thing EVER!
Okay, not really.....please stop chatting with this person and ask yourself why you ever would have wanted to be his baby-mama #3?