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the nest just ate my long post
and I don't have it in me to retype. Summary (if you'll bear with me): the longer we live here, the more DH realizes his job in NYC suuuucked. Fair enough. But now he has me all stressed out about whether we even return to NYC when this gig is up and whether we shouldn't put off TTC even longer if he might be unemployed this time next year and whether we shouldn't be looking at job prospects in other US cities besides NYC for both him and me or trying to figure out whether we can apply for other international jobs elsewhere, etc. etc. etc.
Seriously? I am in France and I've got my head cluttered with all this? It's a good thing I finally started my intensive Alliance Francaise classes since that's six hours/week during which I have to focus on nothing but speaking, reading and writing French. But right now I am at home and wanting to cry just a little.
Re: the nest just ate my long post
I am sorry that things seem to be up in the air especially with TTC.
If I remember correctly, you havent been in France for that long. Perhaps, your DH is going through like a honeymoon phase.
I would just wait to see how he feels in a couple of weeks. Is it possible for him to stay at his job there or do you have to move back?
That's a lot for the mind and soul to deal with! From your previous posts, it really does sound like the quality of life is a lot better for you guys in France--but I agree with dulcemaria that you may find things that you miss more after being away a bit longer.
If your DH is serious about it (and you are on board), I would ask him to come up with a plan about how to make this work for your family (especially with you being the 'trailing spouse').
I think a lot of us are facing the challenge and opportunity of being a global citizen. Visa requirements aside, it's kind of amazing to live in an age where more and more people are able to pick where they live based on their life goals. It's really cool--and waaay harder.
Thanks, Dulce. I am especially upset/disappointed/sad on the TTC front. We put it off last year because things were being negotiated for the international move, a process that took almost 6 months just to tell us when exactly we were leaving for France. Then when we knew for sure, we decided it made sense to wait until we'd been here a while, acclimated, etc. to revisit our timeline. Now I can't help but feel there will always be some excuse to put it off even further and I'm tired of being practical. I'm of the "we'll figure it out if another baby comes along" mindset and DH is currently of the "our lives need to be perfect to have another baby" mindset.
As for the job here, at most they would extend his contract by another six months, just to cover any gap that might arise from a delay in the next person coming from NY. There's no chance of a long-term position here for him.
There is no "perfect" time to have a baby... or even another baby. If we all waited for everything to be "just right" or "perfect" none of us would be procreating... Life happens, get on with it, it's an adventure...
I vote that TTC is a point of negotiation. 'Honey, I agree with your plan as long as I can TTC.' Because why not?
Can you take out private maternity insurance just in case he's between jobs and you're in the states? Or is there another problem? I totally understand the insurance issue, but if it's just a timing issue obviously I would never recommend waiting since you never know!
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks, Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks
Insurance is a big one. I am self-employed, so all the coverage we have is through DH's job.
Good idea to look into the costs of private insurance. I never even thought of this.