Trouble in Paradise
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Glad it's finally Friday, but nervous for H to come home

I'm so glad it's finally Friday and H is coming home from ND.  It will be really nice to get some help with DD this weekend to get half of a break.

 

As much as I'm happy for that, I'm also kind of nervous.  We talked on the phone last night and we both ended up crying with nothing to say.  I'm glad H is finally showing some emotion and he SAYS he is going to work on changing things, but at this point I don't believe it being the last promise he made, he broke and lied about it.  I'm hurt right now and I don't know what the next step is until we actually start counseling.  We have tonight to actually talk, and that's about it this weekend.  We will be around family all weekend, putting on a fake happy face to pretend everything is okay.

 

We set up our first counseling appointment for 4/12 and I lined up daycare to be able to take DD for an extra half hour twice a week, so we can cut out of work a half hour early twice a week to make time for counseling appointments.  That's only a couple weeks away, but right now it feels like that couple weeks is an eternity.  I don't know how to move forward tonight or the next couple weeks.  We've been talking and it seems like I've got as much out of H as I'm going to until we start counseling, and it doesn't seem like enough.   

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Re: Glad it's finally Friday, but nervous for H to come home

  • <hugs> the initial time seeing each other after something like this can be a bit awkward.  Just keep communication open and definitely go to counseling if he is willing and see how it goes. 
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  • Again, a general, oh you have to be better isn't going to break the pattern you two have already set. Just start being clear about your expectations every time the opportunity comes up.

    Give him the baby, tell him to do the dishes, tell him the kid is hungry and hand him a bottle. Little things along the way. If he balks, side eye his ass until he does it. Do not sit back and wait for him to pitch in or it won't happen.



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