Starting Over
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
I don't know how to react to being hit on!!
So I ocassionally fill in as a DJ/Karaoke hostess for a friend of mine's company. This means I go to bars quite frequently, even if I drink rarely. I've done this for 6 years now, kind of a side job +helping when he needs me.
In all these years...I was engaged or married (or in a sleazey bar so I'd wear a fake ring) so I have actually NEVER been hit on. Until Friday night. And I learned something...although it feels incredible...I don't know how to deal with it! Sad, right?
Any advice for being hit on? I just have a hard time, I feel insecure (even if I'm loving it) and in this case, he was pretty cute so in my tension, I froze mostly.
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Re: I don't know how to react to being hit on!!
Well, do you want advice on how to deal with when you want/like to be hit on or when you don't want/like it? Or both?
Right. Are you looking for flirt or to tell people to go pound sand?
If I'm not interested, I'll say something like, "Thanks, I'm flattered, but I'm really not looking for anything right now." If that doesn't work, slap on a polite smile and just keep repeating, "No, thank you" until he goes away. You are allowed to call him names if he tries more than thrice.
If you are.... That's trickier. It all depends on what you're looking for and what you're comfortable with.
So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.
I guess when I like, lol. I'm weird, I know. Just sooo weird for me, and I'm not used to it and felt awkward (but flattered)
Aw thanks for checking in. He was great, except we figured out the neighbors would actually make noise to get him barking and than complain about his barking! It came down to eviction for all, or rehoming him, so I had to do that. Actually finally gave into it on Monday...so we are still adjusting...
If you really want to welcome the attention I have a semi-scientific flirting method (not really, but I do advise my friends.) The main things are: make eye contact, smile, light touches on the arm and turn your pelvis towards the person.
Making little jokes about things the person has said can be good. Sometimes if I'm at a loss for something to say, I'll ask the guy to settle some imaginary dispute that I've made up with my friend (assuming that I'm with friends). Something that could be serious but is somewhat ridiculous can be a nice ice breaker and get the person talking. Extra points if it's about something you're actually interested in. An example would be, "I love the Raiders, but my friend here insist that the 49ers are actually better. We need a tie breaker." Said with a big smile.
Another ice breaker can be to ask a question about something that's controversial but is not actually serious. Like, "Godfather 1 or 2?" - if they say neither you can still segue into the types of movies you like. Or, "Who was the best Bond?" Or, "Should the toilet paper be placed over or under?"