Trouble in Paradise
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We've been invited to a redneck wedding

And it promises to be a sure fire trainwreck. I want to go SO BAD but BF doesn't want to introduce me to his extended family under these circumstances. Spoilsport.

Anyways, the bride is his cousin and her parents are in the middle of a nasty divorce. Plus uncle has been known to get very drunk at weddings and get mouthy. To make things even better, the bride didn't ask her siblings to be in the wedding party and they're throwing a shiit fit. Her older brother will be bringing his FI. They've been dating 3 months. She's 6 months pregnant.

Attire for the wedding: country casual. No shoes on the dance floor.

The happy couple will honeymoon by camping in Florida (in the summer) and then return to Virginia where they will reside with his mother. 

This is my siggy.

Re: We've been invited to a redneck wedding

  • Oooh shucks. How could you miss that glorious occasion?? Country casual with no shoes and everything.
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  • No...shoes....gasp...

    /dead 

    - namaste mothafockaaaas - image
  • Ew, what a sweaty, gross honeymoon.

    ETA: hold the phone!

    imageBowiesInSpace:
     Her older brother will be bringing his FI. They've been dating 3 months. She's 6 months pregnant.

    Forget the barefoot dancing, that is crazy!

  • it is 93 degrees in April, they will die of heat exhaustion in the summer.

    Also, how DARE your boyfriend deny you the ability to share so many memorable stories about the wedding day. That's not FAIR!

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  • Originally I wasn't even invited, but his uncle called him and told him his STBXW sent the invites without talking to him. She only invited his family members, no kids, spouses, or SOs. Apparently it was a way to "get" at him. I don't even know if she's aware that he called all his family members to invite more of them. He's paying for the majority of the wedding, so he feels OK in doing this.

    I do feel legitimately sorry for the bride. Everyone deserves a happy wedding day, but she's pretty much guaranteed not to have one since her parents are using it as a battleground.

    And, yeah, her older brother is under the assumption that Internet dating (he was deployed) can result in pregnancy. Or, at least, he's hoping people are too dumb to do the math there. 

    This is my siggy.
  • can I go?

    I live in FL, so I already qualify as redneck. I'll blend right in.

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  • I want to say that I would do everything within my powers to attend this....

    But I turned down attending a "mock ceremony" after one of my high school BFFs went and did the JP wedding 6 months before that because they "woke up and decided to go get married." This included a WalMart registry on the bottom of the invitation, or you could make a donation to their Honeymoon Fund at the ceremony. The pictures are priceless. The aisle was basically a mud pit, Her dad walked her down the aisle in sweatpants. Half of the pictures have a big blue porta-potty in the background.

    I swear she wasn't trash when we were friends.

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  • OMG kmw, thank you for reminding me! There will be Porta Potties at the event since it is taking place in a field. That alone is giving me pause about going. Porta Potties in the summer around people who have been known to drink too much.....yeeeeeeaaaahhhhhh.
    This is my siggy.
  • Bowies pleeeeease go and take pictures or at least take notes and report back.  I feel bad for the bride because of the way her parents are acting about it all, but as an outsider who is unaffected by the family drama I want to know how it turns out!
  • imageBowiesInSpace:
    OMG kmw, thank you for reminding me! There will be Porta Potties at the event since it is taking place in a field. That alone is giving me pause about going. Porta Potties in the summer around people who have been known to drink too much.....yeeeeeeaaaahhhhhh.

    Surprise

  • imageBowiesInSpace:
    OMG kmw, thank you for reminding me! There will be Porta Potties at the event since it is taking place in a field. That alone is giving me pause about going. Porta Potties in the summer around people who have been known to drink too much.....yeeeeeeaaaahhhhhh.

    Ick! 

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  • imageBowiesInSpace:
    OMG kmw, thank you for reminding me! There will be Porta Potties at the event since it is taking place in a field. That alone is giving me pause about going. Porta Potties in the summer around people who have been known to drink too much.....yeeeeeeaaaahhhhhh.

    Oh.  Ew. Ick!

  • You should def go, but bring this:

    image 

    You don't mess with drunk people's portapotties!

    - namaste mothafockaaaas - image
  • Sounds like a blast.

    FWIW, I don't find a camping honeymoon to be redneck, although maybe that makes me a redneck.

  • imageBowiesInSpace:

    Attire for the wedding: country casual. No shoes on the dance floor.

    +

    imageBowiesInSpace:
    There will be Porta Potties at the event since it is taking place in a field. Porta Potties in the summer around people who have been known to drink too much.

    = Ick!

    You know people aren't going to just take their shoes off to dance and then put them back on when they leave the floor. People be going barefoot to the schitters.

  • Oh my God, you have to go to this wedding and report back!
  • I don't know if I want you to go. I have the most excellent visual in my head now and I am fearful of ruining it.

     

    Gah! What am I saying?? Go! Go!

    I agree with everything that muddled said. You should listen to her. -ESDReturns
  • You need to go and you need to take pictures.
  • imagepolling:

    Sounds like a blast.

    FWIW, I don't find a camping honeymoon to be redneck, although maybe that makes me a redneck.

    I don't think a camping honeymoon sounds redneck either.  I think it sounds fun and romantic.  DH and I weren't really into camping when we got married, but we are now.  Of course, I wouldn't go to a campground, I'd go deep into the wilderness where we wouldn't have to share out babbling mountain brook with anyone.  

    I feel bad for the bride though.  It must really suck to have her parents behaving that way about her wedding.   

  • srgwsrgw member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    imagesillygoosegirl:
    imagepolling:

    Sounds like a blast.

    FWIW, I don't find a camping honeymoon to be redneck, although maybe that makes me a redneck.

    I don't think a camping honeymoon sounds redneck either.  I think it sounds fun and romantic.  DH and I weren't really into camping when we got married, but we are now.  Of course, I wouldn't go to a campground, I'd go deep into the wilderness where we wouldn't have to share out babbling mountain brook with anyone.   

    I don't think it's redneck either. My parents went camping for their honeymoon in 1971. They are very outdoorsy people though. Me personally, I liked a soft bed surrounded by four walls. To each their own.

  • imagesrgw:
    imagesillygoosegirl:
    imagepolling:

    Sounds like a blast.

    FWIW, I don't find a camping honeymoon to be redneck, although maybe that makes me a redneck.

    I don't think a camping honeymoon sounds redneck either.  I think it sounds fun and romantic.  DH and I weren't really into camping when we got married, but we are now.  Of course, I wouldn't go to a campground, I'd go deep into the wilderness where we wouldn't have to share out babbling mountain brook with anyone.   

    I don't think it's redneck either. My parents went camping for their honeymoon in 1971. They are very outdoorsy people though. Me personally, I liked a soft bed surrounded by four walls. To each their own.

    Agreed. Our honeymoon was at a cabin in the woods. With a hot tub.
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