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Huge Decision...

So...good news. FI got a job offer. A great job doing IT for hotels. The bad news: It's in Chicago. We JUST moved into a place 2 months ago with a friend and I just made manager at my current job. There's a lot of discussion going on before we decide anything. I can transfer through the hotel that I work at but I probably won't start out as a manager. Weighing that against the issues he's had finding work here though...Chicago might be the best option. We're trying to set up a date to go out next month to check the situation out.The guy offering the job wants to see what the FI is able to do an we'd have to discuss moving expenses and what not. 

It's really super exciting but totally terrifying too. I've never lived in a town with more of a population than  75000. We've been talking about me going back to school as well. So yeah...extremely crazy and lots of risk but we're trying to think it through. Thoughts?

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Re: Huge Decision...

  • Would it mean you could move out of the trailer? If so, I vote yes. Do it.
    image
    11/11/11 = 5 years. Woah!
  • I still don't think you should marry your FI. 

    He should take the job and you should stay.

    image
    "That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
  • lol Yes we would get out of the trailer. Roommate is completely understanding about it. 

    Cali I know you don't want me to marry the FI but I've never wavered in that decision since I said yes. FI isn't perfect but if I put down all of the changes he's made to try and be a better person it would be like reading the HP series. He's a good man and he's tried hard for me on a lot of things. They haven't all worked out but I'm not one to bail when things get tough.  

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  • Your FI's a wizard that has to save the magical world? That must be exhausting.
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  • imagebuddhagouda:
    Your FI's a wizard that has to save the magical world? That must be exhausting.

     

    Not quite. lmao He's magical in some ways though. *wink wink* Ugh..I did I really make that joke?

    My point is, he's done a LOT of changing. A list that would be about as long as the HP series. Bad analogy probably..but then I never claimed to be good with them. lol 

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  • imagebuddhagouda:
    Your FI's a wizard that has to save the magical world? That must be exhausting.

     

    Not quite. lmao He's magical in some ways though. *wink wink* Ugh..I did I really make that joke?

    My point is, he's done a LOT of changing. A list that would be about as long as the HP series. Bad analogy probably..but then I never claimed to be good with them. lol 

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  • imagebuddhagouda:
    Your FI's a wizard that has to save the magical world? That must be exhausting.

     

    Not quite. lmao He's magical in some ways though. *wink wink* Ugh..I did I really make that joke?

    My point is, he's done a LOT of changing. A list that would be about as long as the HP series. Bad analogy probably..but then I never claimed to be good with them. lol 

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  • imagebuddhagouda:
    Your FI's a wizard that has to save the magical world? That must be exhausting.

     

    Not quite. lmao He's magical in some ways though. *wink wink* Ugh..I did I really make that joke?

    My point is, he's done a LOT of changing. A list that would be about as long as the HP series. Bad analogy probably..but then I never claimed to be good with them. lol 

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  • Ugh. Didn't mean to post that 4 freaking times. Glitchy forum. :( 

     

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  • So, the offer will remain open for nearly a month while you "try" to go out there and maybe negotiate moving expenses? 
  • Something doesn't add up. He's been offered a job? But you aren't going out to "check things out" in a month? Who hires someone and sits around for a month. And who hires someone without knowing what they are able to do?
  • imageCalledOut:
    So, the offer will remain open for nearly a month while you "try" to go out there and maybe negotiate moving expenses? 

    I don't get this either.  Or the part where you say the guy needs to see what FI can do?  How do you offer someone a job without knowing what their abilities are?

    Also is the job actually in the city?  Even so, you can move to one of the outlying suburbs if living in the city freaks you out.  It would also probably be cheaper than living in the city.

    IMG_2788

    2/20/2011
  • So did he actually get an offer, or do they just want him to come to Chicago so they can assess his skill level and see if they want to hire him? Those are two completely different things.
    image
  • The time table is kind of open on this one. They've been looking for about six months to find someone that can do what they need which is be on call and go wherever they need within the city. FI has been talking to the guy for awhile and said he'd hire FI if we could get out there. He does want to assess FI's skill level before we agree to anything solid. The FI told him up front that we can't make a big move like that out of the blue due to expenses and just the risk. Boss agreed and said he's going to try and contact one of the hotels he services to see if they can comp him a room. 

     We don't want to blindly go out there and have is crash on our heads but if it's a legitimate offer we want to check it out.  

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  • And it is directly in the city. I'm not opposed to being in the city. Just a little wary. I've never even driven in a big city. I feel like such a country bumpkin. lol 
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  • Uh yeah, that doesn't sound like an actual job offer.
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  • I don't have your backstory which seems important here.

    Without that, my thoughts are, first and foremost, this opportunity sounds a bit off.  Do not move there until your have a firm offer and acceptance in writing.  And a legit company will fly you out for an interview and to look around if they want you badly enough.  Second, Chicago is a very, very expensive city, especially compared to your experience in small towns.  You need to look very hard at your salaries there and your budget.  You need to do a ton of research into costs of apartments/transportation/food/fun/everything before going a step further.  

    image
  • Then don't define it as a job offer? 

    I figured it's easier then saying "So a guy said he would hire my FI but first we need to go out there so he can make sure that my FI can do the job as needed. And if that works then we will perhaps move out there." every time.

    The point is..there is a possibility that we may relocate. The guy seems really interested and is willing to work with us in our situation to give my FI a chance. All I can say (with a bit of reservation) is YAY.  

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  • If the guy?/company? is legit, he should foot the cost of your H flying out to try out, imo.
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  •  We're trying to get it to fall into the time I already have off for the honeymoon. So if he can get a hotel comped, at the very least we get a free hotel for an unexpected honeymoon out of it. 
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  • It's not just tomato / tomah-to.  It's sort of a stretch to make any decisions about re-location before the interview even takes place.  And speaking of the interview - employers generally don't schedule interviews in a "whenever you can get out here, maybe sometime next month" sort of way.  It's supposed to go something like this:  "We'd like to meet with you during the week of________.  Give us your availability and we'll make the travel arrangements."  I would assume that any "guy" charged with IT for hotels in a major metro-area would be familiar with the process.  The fact that he's not seems weird.  And by "weird" I mean "not a real job."

     Also - scheduling a honeymoon around a job interview so that you can get a free night a hotel?  That sucks. 

  • imageCalledOut:

     Also - scheduling a honeymoon around a job interview so that you can get a free night a hotel?  That sucks. 

    on so many levels 

    image
  • Can't you just, like, drive your trailer up there or something?
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  • imageZombri:

    imagebuddhagouda:
    Your FI's a wizard that has to save the magical world? That must be exhausting.

     

    Not quite. lmao He's magical in some ways though. *wink wink* Ugh..I did I really make that joke?

    My point is, he's done a LOT of changing. A list that would be about as long as the HP series. Bad analogy probably..but then I never claimed to be good with them. lol 

    Husband are not projects.  You don't marry the guy who tries really hard and is improving, you marry the guy whose a catch already.  You seem really really naive.  I worry about you living in a city too. 

    image "...Saving just one pet won't change the world...but, surely, the world will change for that one pet..."
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